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BS: Cartoon Characters who didn't make it.

24 Aug 05 - 06:38 PM (#1548954)
Subject: BS: Cartoon Characters who didn't make it.
From: GUEST,Ralphy Rabbit

Unbeknownst to the general public, there were thousands of cartoon characters who never made the big time. I was one of them. I tried my best to break into the business right from the late 20's, into the "talkies", and on into the color movies. I tried Disney, Hanna Barbera, I tried 'em all.

You haven't heard of me, have you? No, but you've heard about Bugs Bunny! And you've heard about Peter Rabbit! And you've heard about Bre'r Rabbit! Well, Bugs was a syndicate-connected crook who bribed and slept his way to the top. Peter was a closet pervert. And "Bre'r" didn't even have a proper NAME! Those guys were bums, all of 'em. They were third rate hacks. I found out early that you can have all the talent, all the skill, all the heart...and Hollywood just spits you out on the trash pile if you don't know the right people and sleep with the right people. I never filched one carrot. Not one. I worked 7 days a week in lousy hash joints. What did I get for it? A skin ailment, that's what!

But enough about me. I'm just one sad casualty of the destructive cartoon industry's war on good taste and honesty in art.

Here are some of the others who should have made it big and never did. Bow your heads in a moment of silence when you read their names:

Horace Horsecollar (reduced to embarrassing "Guest" appearances at the whim of "the rodent" (you know who!)

Gus Goose (portrayed as a goof, he was brilliant)

Joe Jellyfish (had an act that had to be seen to be believed)

Andrew J. Morgenstern IV (a gorilla who could tapdance and juggle better than Gloria Gaynor)

Ima de Best (Mexican jumping bean character. Shot down in a Tijuana
nightclub and then roasted and eaten!)

Pie-Eye the Sailor Man - was shafted by Thimble Theatre and ended up starving in an alleyway in downtown Peoria. Popeye stole all of Pie- Eye's best routines and parlayed them into a lucrative career.

AND...(drum roll..........................)

* * * Licky Louse * * * - (had great plan for future Licky Louse Club, but was betrayed by Walt Disney and YOU-KNOW-WHO (the filthy rodent)! Licky took his own life by jumping into a vat of hot melted butter. He was undoubtedly the greatest "toon" of them all.)

I would appreciate it if other unsung cartoon characters of film and TV got a brief moment of recognition here...the recognition that the industry and public never gave them.

Thank you very much. Now I am going to go out and get very, very drunk.

- Ralphy Rabbit (the Star you never knew)


24 Aug 05 - 07:17 PM (#1548965)
Subject: RE: BS: Cartoon Characters who didn't make it.
From: pdq

Related to, but not exactly 'on subject' is the story of the Gaynor family. There were actually four kids:

Mitzi Gaynor became a pinup girl in the 1950's, apparently not knowing that WW II was over.

Fred "Half" Gaynor was a famous dwarf in the "Circus Boy" movies, best known for saying "hand me the pliers".

Siegfried "Full" Gaynor was the world hotdog-eating champion in 1963.

Gloria, who was not pleased with the rest of her family, showed it by singing "I Will Survive".


24 Aug 05 - 07:23 PM (#1548971)
Subject: RE: BS: Cartoon Characters who didn't make it.
From: Bill D

if I had time, I'd tell the whole story of the Nelson family. Full, Half and Ozzie.....


24 Aug 05 - 07:26 PM (#1548974)
Subject: RE: BS: Cartoon Characters who didn't make it.
From: Ebbie

Ralphy, I've heard of you! So now you spend your days getting drunk? With food stamps, no less. I'm embarrassed for you.


24 Aug 05 - 07:33 PM (#1548979)
Subject: RE: BS: Cartoon Characters who didn't make it.
From: GUEST,Loretta Louse

Everything Ralphy said is true, except that it was Mitzi Gaynor to whom he meant to compare the great Andrew J. Morgenstern IV, the tapdancing gorilla. Mitzi had great legs, but she couldn't tapdance like Andrew could. Licky was my great uncle, a true gentleman, and he was probably the most talented insect in the history of film. He is greatly missed. We also had the good fortune to know Ima de Best, because he stayed at our apartment once for 3 weeks. He was amazing. If he had been a human being, I feel sure that he would be as well known today in Mexico as Benito Juarez.

When Licky threatened to sue "the rodent" for blatantly stealing his Licky Louse Club idea, a bunch of "heavies" showed up at his house late one night with baseball bats and a can of bug spray. Licky was not afraid of them, but they threatened to rub out the entire family. Licky couldn't allow his own interests to imperil his wife and children, so he walked away into the sunset. He tried to get work at the other studios, but Disney had blacklisted him. All the doors were closed. It was over for Licky. The vat of hot butter may have killed his body, but it was Hollywood that killed his spirit.

I dearly hope that "the rodent" has had a few sleepless nights over it, that's all I can say.


24 Aug 05 - 09:26 PM (#1549027)
Subject: RE: BS: Cartoon Characters who didn't make it.
From: open mike

actually i think there was Henry...
who didn't have any hair. HE may
have had a pal named Sally whose
hair sort of looked like a scrub brush.

how about the Katzenjammer kids?

Gasoline Alley? I do not see these
comics these days.

and i miss gary larson,
but he DID make it, and
chose to back off of his
own accord.


24 Aug 05 - 09:29 PM (#1549030)
Subject: RE: BS: Cartoon Characters who didn't make it.
From: Cluin

Sucky the Tick wasn't too popular on Saturday mornings I remember. Got yanked off the air and replaced with Hong Kong Phooey.


24 Aug 05 - 09:45 PM (#1549048)
Subject: RE: BS: Cartoon Characters who didn't make it.
From: GUEST,Felix the Cat

I was a big item once. So were Archy and Mehitabel, but that was literature. Still, they were really in much the same field, I think. Mehitabel was a cool cat to whom I could very much relate. Archy was a cockroach with a great soul, God rest it.

I don't miss the fame. I have retired to a quiet life in California, not far from the famed Cannery Row. I look back on those glory days with a warm feeling. I have no regrets.


24 Aug 05 - 09:56 PM (#1549060)
Subject: RE: BS: Cartoon Characters who didn't make it.
From: number 6

Bert the Turtle.

sIx


24 Aug 05 - 09:58 PM (#1549066)
Subject: RE: BS: Cartoon Characters who didn't make it.
From: Cluin

Tippy Turtle on SNL about 20 odd years ago.

Hey, Tippy Turtle
Whatcha gonna do today?
First I'm gonna bother ev'rybody I see
Then I'll prob'ly go home an' get drunk


24 Aug 05 - 10:20 PM (#1549081)
Subject: RE: BS: Cartoon Characters who didn't make it.
From: Rapparee

And Crusader Rabbit and his pal, Rags the Tiger, who was ripped off by Hobbes. Or Dudley Doright's horse, who by his great acting upstaged Dud once too often and ended up as Alpo. Or -- dare I mention? -- Sniffles, Mary Jane's mouse "friend." Green Lantern's youthful sidekick, Dimbulb. The Blue Tick. Major Canada, somewhat less well known than Captain America. And, of course, Heckle and Jeckle.

Ah, corporate America's beancounter culture has so very much to answer for!


24 Aug 05 - 10:29 PM (#1549088)
Subject: RE: BS: Cartoon Characters who didn't make it.
From: GUEST,Conway Coon

You are so right, Rapaire! They have no conscience. I had a promising career planned. I was to play a dashing Zorro-like racoon hero who rescues other forest animals from the nefarious plots of bad guy developers led by arch-villain Mad Major Quantrill who goes around bulldozing the natural habitat. Then affirmative action came along. They decided that my name, "Conway Coon" had racist connotations, and the show was axed! Can you believe that? I AM a racoon! How can my name be deemed racist by anyone? It's ridiculous. I'm not racist, they are specist! I have had to eke out a living working in a convenience store. I could have been a contender.

I may consider a segue into country music...


24 Aug 05 - 10:32 PM (#1549091)
Subject: RE: BS: Cartoon Characters who didn't make it.
From: Cluin

Captain Canuck and his sidekick Al Coholic.


24 Aug 05 - 10:34 PM (#1549093)
Subject: RE: BS: Cartoon Characters who didn't make it.
From: GUEST,Mr Gator

I had a small comic strip going in the 50's and early 60's. It was cute, but it's gone now. I basically lost out to Walt Kelly's Albert Alligator. I was cuter.


24 Aug 05 - 11:14 PM (#1549116)
Subject: RE: BS: Cartoon Characters who didn't make it.
From: frogprince

Then there was Winky the one-eyed wonder lizard...


25 Aug 05 - 12:31 AM (#1549148)
Subject: RE: BS: Cartoon Characters who didn't make it.
From: number 6

Does anyone remember what song Bert the Turtle sang??

sIx


25 Aug 05 - 12:45 AM (#1549150)
Subject: RE: BS: Cartoon Characters who didn't make it.
From: Peace

Reminds me of an episode of "Barney Miller" in which a guy was arrested and taken to the station. Deitrich asked him why he was so sad. He said he was sad because no one ever laughed at his jokes. Deitrich asked him his name. The comedian replied, "David Hitler."


25 Aug 05 - 04:13 AM (#1549197)
Subject: RE: BS: Cartoon Characters who didn't make it.
From: Cluin

Wasn't that a Hill Street Blues episode, with Vic Hitler, the narcoleptic comic?


25 Aug 05 - 08:36 AM (#1549304)
Subject: RE: BS: Cartoon Characters who didn't make it.
From: Rapparee

Winky Dink was on TV during the mid-1950s. I wonder what ever happened to him? Anybody know?


25 Aug 05 - 08:43 AM (#1549314)
Subject: RE: BS: Cartoon Characters who didn't make it.
From: gnu

It was originally "Bugger the Bunny", but, with a little PR makeover, it eventually became successful.


25 Aug 05 - 08:46 AM (#1549319)
Subject: RE: BS: Cartoon Characters who didn't make it.
From: Rapparee

And don't forget the re-spelling of Elmer Fudd's last name.


25 Aug 05 - 09:12 AM (#1549342)
Subject: RE: BS: Cartoon Characters who didn't make it.
From: GUEST, Topsie

and not exactly cartoons, but do you remember the Bumblies?


25 Aug 05 - 10:09 AM (#1549397)
Subject: RE: BS: Cartoon Characters who didn't make it.
From: number 6

Where they like Bill and Ben the Flower Pot Men?

sIx


25 Aug 05 - 10:26 AM (#1549412)
Subject: RE: BS: Cartoon Characters who didn't make it.
From: EBarnacle

What, no one recalls Okie Doaks, from the court of King Korny?


25 Aug 05 - 12:21 PM (#1549514)
Subject: RE: BS: Cartoon Characters who didn't make it.
From: Cool Beans

I remember Okey Doaks, and Princess Pomona, his girlfriend.
But what of Alice the Malice and Craig the Plague, a coupla Dennis the Menace comic book knockoffs?
Peter Potamus.
Wuff the Prairie Dog.


25 Aug 05 - 01:36 PM (#1549577)
Subject: RE: BS: Cartoon Characters who didn't make it.
From: wildlone

The Bumblies song-
Bumbly, Bumbly what do you say?
Let's sing a Bumbly tune.
Bumbly, Bumbly flying away
And shooting over the moon.
I'm Bumbly number one.
I'm Bumbly two, that's me.
I'm the one that's not very bright -
I'm Bumbly number three

The Bumblies


25 Aug 05 - 04:48 PM (#1549719)
Subject: RE: BS: Cartoon Characters who didn't make it.
From: GUEST,Mrr

Anybody remember Tobar the 8th man? (there's a prehistoric monster that's come from outer space / it's (something something something) to destroy the human race / the FBI is helpless, it's 20 stories tall! Whom shall we get whom shall we call? Call Tobar, the 8th man - faster than a rocket, swifter than a jet, he's the mighty Tobar, he's the one to get! Call Tobar...) - he had a big 8 on his shirt. This is all I remember about him, other than this had to be before 1966 when we went to Africa, and I thought it was "the ape man" until I noticed the 8.


25 Aug 05 - 04:49 PM (#1549722)
Subject: RE: BS: Cartoon Characters who didn't make it.
From: Charmion

I've heard that Oswald the Rabbit ended up sipping Aqua Velva under a bridge, after YOU KNOW WHO squeezed him out of Unca Walt's affections.

And whatever happened to Andy Panda, and Cecil the Seasick Sea Serpent and his little pal Beanie? (Practically the very first thing I remember seeing on television, circa 1960.)


25 Aug 05 - 05:12 PM (#1549738)
Subject: RE: BS: Cartoon Characters who didn't make it.
From: Cluin

Andy Panda ended up working as a fluffer for the Thundercats.


25 Aug 05 - 05:27 PM (#1549748)
Subject: RE: BS: Cartoon Characters who didn't make it.
From: Charmion

Roger Ramjet, he's our man, the hero of our nation,
The only thing that's wrong with him is mental retardation!


25 Aug 05 - 08:29 PM (#1549855)
Subject: RE: BS: Cartoon Characters who didn't make it.
From: Lonesome EJ

Some of the Cartoon characters sitting around the Old Tunes Retirement Home are sadder than the ones that never made it. What about the King of Saturday Morning Cartoons? The mouse who made Micky look like a hairdresser? The one who made "Here I come to save the day!" a common figure of speech in the 50s and 60s? The James Bond of rodents who nailed Krakatoa Katy after he lassoed the volcano shut with a cable from the Golden gate Bridge? Mighty Mouse!! What the hell happened? They made a feature film of Inspector Gadget and left Mighty Mouse to fade into a dim memory?! Where's the justice in that? Don't we need him more than ever, really? Jeez.


25 Aug 05 - 08:38 PM (#1549863)
Subject: RE: BS: Cartoon Characters who didn't make it.
From: Bob the Postman

Please, someone, post the words and chords for the Bill And Ben theme song.


25 Aug 05 - 09:20 PM (#1549894)
Subject: RE: BS: Cartoon Characters who didn't make it.
From: Rapparee

Winky Dink, and you
Winky Dink, and me
We are pals through fair and stormy weather.
Presto-chango, that's a thing of the past
Winko, winko works twice as fast....


Ah, ou sont les chansons d'antan?


25 Aug 05 - 09:28 PM (#1549900)
Subject: RE: BS: Cartoon Characters who didn't make it.
From: number 6

"Bill and Ben... Bill and Ben...
      Bill and Ben, Bill and Ben, Flowerpot Men!"

That's the best I can come up with Bob.

sIx


25 Aug 05 - 09:35 PM (#1549904)
Subject: RE: BS: Cartoon Characters who didn't make it.
From: Severn

Anyone remember the League of Animal Super Heros?:

Public Serpent

Trouble Bruin

The Lone Shark

Wonder Whooo, (The Telepathic Owl)

and a couple of nice Catholic girls, MagnifiCat! & The Flying Buttress-Nanny Goat Of Steel!("Nice butt, girl!")

....to go with that overpowering SheSkunk, Maid Scents-Defender Of Law 'n' Odor

"Take THAT!, Insti-Gator!!!!"....Ahhh yes! Those were the days!


.....And who could ever forget the short-lived attempt at a male action hero to cross over to the Saturday Morning Little Girl Market, none other than.....

RAMBO BRITE!!!!

"I'LL teach you to mess with The Color Folk, Hugh Neutral! EAT HOT SPECTRUM, INFIDEL!!!"

"You'll never put any MORE kids to sleep, Lord Kumbaya!"


(Lasted about two weeks.....)


At one time...."All part of this nutritious breakfast!" And far more absorbing than Sponge Bob.


25 Aug 05 - 09:44 PM (#1549909)
Subject: RE: BS: Cartoon Characters who didn't make it.
From: GUEST,Ralphy Rabbit

Oh, my aching head....

I am just in tears here over all this. So much promise, so many broken dreams...


25 Aug 05 - 10:03 PM (#1549924)
Subject: RE: BS: Cartoon Characters who didn't make it.
From: GUEST,Popeye

I yam disgustipated! Ralphy Rabbit is tellin' lies about how I stole the thunder from Pie-Eye the Sailor Man. I yam innocent! Pie-Eye was an okay guy, but he had some weaknesses. I yam not the type to gossip, so I ain't sayin' what they was, but I did not steal nothin' from him. If you was in reach, Ralphy, your head would be achin' worse, lemme tell ya! What nerve! I yam infuriorated!

Popeye the (real) Sailor Man


25 Aug 05 - 10:12 PM (#1549929)
Subject: RE: BS: Cartoon Characters who didn't make it.
From: GUEST,Brutus

Get over and let me puch ya right in the eye ya sissy sailor!


25 Aug 05 - 11:22 PM (#1549961)
Subject: RE: BS: Cartoon Characters who didn't make it.
From: Severn

Hey, Sailor!

You may have been strong to the Finnish, Popeye, but the Swedish preferred your rival! However, they DO prefer your FRIED chicken, (even if they stole the rights to "Chicken Pot-Pie" from you!)

And if you were REALLY any good, You'd have a successful chain of SPINACH restaurants. You're just lucky those N'awlins folks made some money off your dance craze years ago and still have a soft spot in their hearts and wallets for you. Not enough to include ANY spinach (or yams, for that matter) on the menu, of course! Now, by the time they'd actually cooked your spinach, it would likely be charred anyway, but the Collard Folks would probably still like it!

(My apologies to the Green Collard Workers. Fuzzy Zoeller made me tell that joke!)

...And how many poor kids got deformed forearms from eating that vile green stuff? And blue toes? What kind of steroids did they lace that s**t with anyway?!?!

What's more, if those folks could have read the funnies in the Chinese papers, They's know that "General Tso's Chicken" was far more hilarious than you ever were, and HE'D have the franchise.

SO THERE!


26 Aug 05 - 12:51 AM (#1549983)
Subject: RE: BS: Cartoon Characters who didn't make it.
From: Peace

"Wasn't that a Hill Street Blues episode, with Vic Hitler, the narcoleptic comic?"

Cluin, you might be right. But for some reason I have Deitrich in the pictue. But, my memory ain't what it used to be and never was (with thanks to Will Rogers).


26 Aug 05 - 02:38 AM (#1550006)
Subject: RE: BS: Cartoon Characters who didn't make it.
From: dianavan

Baron Barracuda ?????

A vague memory.


26 Aug 05 - 02:59 AM (#1550011)
Subject: RE: BS: Cartoon Characters who didn't make it.
From: SharonA

GUEST Mrr(zy?):

I remember the 8th Man. Also I remember that his name was spelled "TOBOR" (because it was "robot" spelled backward). No one was supposed to know that Mr. Tobor was a robot, so this clever cover-up was devised; I remember being surprised that the inventor of such a mechanical marvel wasn't smart enough to come up with a better ruse.

I remember that Tobor used to change from his disguise-as-a-human to his costume-with-number-8-on-chest in an odd way: a vertical line would appear down the center of his body and then the two sections of his body would retract somehow, like a Star Trek door opening up, revealing the different costume behind the "panels" of the "door". I recall that the sound effect for this was similar to an ocarina going halfway up a major scale (and the change back to the Mr. Tobor disguise was accompanied by the ocarina going back down that half-scale). Or was it down and then back up? Either way, it was cheesy.

I found the lyrics to his theme song:

There's a prehistoric monster who came from outer space,
Created by the Martians to destroy the human race.
The F.B.I. is helpless. It's 20 stories tall.
What can we do?
Who can we call?

Call TOBOR, The 8th Man
Call TOBOR, The 8th Man
Faster than a rocket, quicker than a jet,
He's the mighty robot, he's the one to get.
Call TOBOR, The 8th Man
Quick, call TOBOR, the mightiest robot of them all.


Seems that Ralph Bakshi worked on the animation for the show's title sequence, according to this site: http://www.alphalink.com.au/~roglen/tobor.htm (the site includes a link to listen to the song)


26 Aug 05 - 04:04 AM (#1550027)
Subject: RE: BS: Cartoon Characters who didn't make it.
From: John MacKenzie

Old UK TV Bits

What about the Boy's from the Bush remember them?
There was Pappy George 'Gulf' Bush and the kids George 'What National Guard' Junior, and Jeb 'Where the fuck is Florida' Bush. I wonder whatever happened to them, they were really funny weren't they?
Giok


26 Aug 05 - 07:04 AM (#1550125)
Subject: RE: BS: Cartoon Characters who didn't make it.
From: Severn

Wasn't Baron Barracuda a puppet dangled from on high in the absolutely horrible low-low-budget "Diver Dan", where a guy in a deep sea diver's mask walked around against a blue backdrop talking to wooden fish on strings? Production values were almost non-existant in this one. (Uh oh! Now all the divers out there will bring up the divers-ity question!). Anyway, I always wondered what a nice guy like Dan was doing in a dive like that in the first place!

I'd think that maybe the Puppets Of Yesterday's Saturdays could "stand having a few threads of their own" (so to speak). Someone should definately take a hand in this.

And what about live-action animals, like Lancelot Link?

.....Ahhhh, but they're NOT cartoons!

As for "The Boys From The Bush", Giok, Saturday morning half-hour animated Op-Ed Toons could be the next frontier. Work on it!


26 Aug 05 - 09:09 AM (#1550210)
Subject: RE: BS: Cartoon Characters who didn't make it.
From: Severn

Licky Louse actually got all his best lines from the ancient Chinese philosopher, Lao Tsze. A case of Poetic Lice-Sense, I guess!

And as for Conway Coon, your brother Ty atually had a running supporting role on Deputy Dawg for a few years, so what are you griping about?!?! Ty, as I remember, was in serious consideration in the '70s as running mate in the Muskie Campaign. Hey, you could be like a California Raisin, and have no Bran Recognition at whatsoever!


26 Aug 05 - 09:15 AM (#1550214)
Subject: RE: BS: Cartoon Characters who didn't make it.
From: Rapparee

The shortest running cartoon series I know of starred Larry Lynx and his sidekick, Vic Vole. You might remember the first and only show, where they got lost in the mountains and Larry got so very, very, hungry....


26 Aug 05 - 09:21 AM (#1550218)
Subject: RE: BS: Cartoon Characters who didn't make it.
From: MMario

8THman site


26 Aug 05 - 09:31 AM (#1550225)
Subject: RE: BS: Cartoon Characters who didn't make it.
From: MMario

This brazilian site has a picture of 8th Man smoking his "special cigarette" to renew his energy....

http://www.mofolandia.com.br/index_anime.htm


26 Aug 05 - 09:55 AM (#1550246)
Subject: RE: BS: Cartoon Characters who didn't make it.
From: bobad

Mr.Wong - he never made the big time but you can catch his show here


26 Aug 05 - 09:56 AM (#1550247)
Subject: RE: BS: Cartoon Characters who didn't make it.
From: bobad

If you liked Mr.Wong check out Jesus and his brothers.


26 Aug 05 - 02:56 PM (#1550469)
Subject: RE: BS: Cartoon Characters who didn't make it.
From: SharonA

Thanks for the sites, MMario! I'd forgotten about Tobor's energy cigarettes. Can you imagine him trying to re-energize nowadays? Lots of scenes of him excusing himself to go outside the office, a restaurant, etc., for a smoke -- hmmm, doesn't exactly move the plot along. Besides, the villains would always know where to find him -- they'd just zap all the groups of smokers on the sidewalks and parking lots till they got 'im (while anti-smoking lobbyists cheered them along). Nah, I guess ol' Tobor wouldn't "make it" in TV these days.


26 Aug 05 - 06:50 PM (#1550601)
Subject: RE: BS: Cartoon Characters who didn't make it.
From: GUEST,Andy the Accountant

So after the raging success of "Bob the Builder" some genius studio execs decided to pilot some other shows of an alliterative occupational nature. There was me, Andy the Accountant, and Carl the Chemist, Randy the Radiologist and lots of others. We all went over like lead balloons. The only one that came close to flying was Milton the Mechanic, but the studio couldn't get him to stop calling hard-to-reach sparkplugs "filthy fuckin' whores" and that just wouldn't do with a mostly preschool audience.


26 Aug 05 - 09:13 PM (#1550676)
Subject: RE: BS: Cartoon Characters who didn't make it.
From: The Fooles Troupe

Did 8th Man smoke Mary Jane Brand cigaretes?


27 Aug 05 - 12:09 AM (#1550741)
Subject: RE: BS: Cartoon Characters who didn't make it.
From: Peace

Mickey the Rat


27 Aug 05 - 12:43 AM (#1550752)
Subject: RE: BS: Cartoon Characters who didn't make it.
From: GUEST

Spunky and Tadpole?


27 Aug 05 - 12:51 AM (#1550757)
Subject: RE: BS: Cartoon Characters who didn't make it.
From: Cluin

Contrary to popular belief, Archie Andrews never made it.

If he would have just quit chasing that stuck-up bitch Veronica, Betty would have let him get his end away long ago.


27 Aug 05 - 01:15 AM (#1550767)
Subject: RE: BS: Cartoon Characters who didn't make it.
From: Peace

LOL


27 Aug 05 - 11:56 AM (#1550826)
Subject: RE: BS: Cartoon Characters who didn't make it.
From: John MacKenzie

Ronnie Wood and Blondie!
G..


27 Aug 05 - 01:37 PM (#1550883)
Subject: RE: BS: Cartoon Characters who didn't make it.
From: GUEST,Veronica Rutledge

You are clueless as usual, Cluin. Your offensive remark about Veronica Lodge is nothing more than envious sniping at your betters, in my opinion. I have rather modelled myself after Veronica, my namesake as it were, although she is a brunette and I am not. (I have hair the colour of dark honey, which suits my complexion really quite well.) Veronica has style and she knows how to use it. Betty is a nice girl, but really quite ordinary. She's the kind who ends up working behind a counter, marrying some stupid yobbo who drinks too much, and turning into a fat frump with curlers in her hair in some pathetic walk-up in East London filled with screaming kids.

Veronica Lodge, however, is the type who dates gorgeous men from all over the world, travels to places like Monaco and St Tropez, and gets her picture on the front of famous magazines. My type, in other words. I have studied these things quite carefully, using the example of my Aunt Penelope as my inspiration, and I am now approaching what Aunt Penelope terms the "dangerous age". I intend, like Veronica in the Archie comics, to have adventures, go interesting places, and see interesting people who are fun and extremely rich. The cream does rise to the top, you know.

As for that silly Archie Andrews, I imagine you are right. He's soooo pedestrian. Veronica would never surrender her virtue to a boy like him. Not a chance. Sad to say, there simply ARE no desirable boys in that comic. Not one. Reggie thinks he's desirable, but he's wrong. Archie thinks so too...and he is DEAD wrong! LOL! Even Jughead is cooler than Archie, in my opinion.

* Veronica


27 Aug 05 - 03:36 PM (#1550963)
Subject: RE: BS: Cartoon Characters who didn't make it.
From: GUEST,Ron Davies

Mortimer Mouse needed a makeover and a name change.


27 Aug 05 - 04:13 PM (#1550992)
Subject: RE: BS: Cartoon Characters who didn't make it.
From: Rapparee

Mortimer Mouse was Mickey's brother, according to Berke Breathed's Outland.


27 Aug 05 - 05:39 PM (#1551078)
Subject: RE: BS: Cartoon Characters who didn't make it.
From: Azizi

Severn,

I'm just reading this thread, and want to tell you how much I liked your witty 25 Aug 05 - 11:22 PM post.

I have to admit that it took me two reads to get "srong to the Finnish" , but the play on words that I have to give you the most props for are:

"Now, by the time they'd actually cooked your spinach, it would likely be charred anyway, but the Collard Folks would probably still like it!

(My apologies to the Green Collard Workers....}"

"Collard folks"- LOL!!



Azizi


27 Aug 05 - 06:06 PM (#1551099)
Subject: RE: BS: Cartoon Characters who didn't make it.
From: GUEST,Ron Davies

According to Disney, Mortimer was Minnie Mouse's uncle, "retconned"---- (how's that for a word?--contraction of retroactive continuity)---- in 1936.

Mortimer Mouse was also, as you're probably aware, Disney's name for Mickey, before his wife suggested Mickey was a better choice.


27 Aug 05 - 06:46 PM (#1551131)
Subject: RE: BS: Cartoon Characters who didn't make it.
From: gnu

Originally, it was Mickey Moose, but, back then, production costs for the extensive artwork reduced the character to a mouse.


27 Aug 05 - 06:58 PM (#1551141)
Subject: RE: BS: Cartoon Characters who didn't make it.
From: Donuel

The Simsons did a show about many of the old cartoon characters that didn't make it.


27 Aug 05 - 08:34 PM (#1551198)
Subject: RE: BS: Cartoon Characters who didn't make it.
From: Little Hawk

The Simpsons never would have made it either...back when North American society was still more or less sane and half-reasonable. ;-)


28 Aug 05 - 01:25 AM (#1551332)
Subject: RE: BS: Cartoon Characters who didn't make it.
From: Cluin

Whatever that means.


28 Aug 05 - 09:33 AM (#1551492)
Subject: RE: BS: Cartoon Characters who didn't make it.
From: GUEST,Daisy and Minnie

Yes, it's us. Donald and Mickey's long-suffering girlfriends. We're posting this together to let you know the truth about these bastards.

This is Daisy. I gotta tell ya, that Donald is one sex-crazy sonofabitch. If I hadn't had my oviduct tied years ago I'd be the mother of who know how many little Donnies. And do you know why he talks like that? Because he's drunk all the time, that's why! Crazy duck wears that sailor suit, do you know how many times I've tryied to get him to wear a shirt and tie, but only to be tossed aside for that thing he wears? And it gets sooooooooo filthy, what with the slobber he spits out when he's mad.

Honey, you got it easy! (This is Minnie.) You know why Mickey's voice is so high? You ever hear of "mouse balls?" Well, he ain't got any. And don't come around to me about those "nephews" of his, because they're really a couple of guys he picked up at one of "those" bars. No, in that first film he made, "Steamboat Willie" it was called, he got his willie caught in the, well, it's not nice to talk about it. Anyway, it should have been called "Steamboat Unwilly."

Come on, girlfriend, let's have another beer and go see Pluto and Horace.


28 Aug 05 - 10:21 AM (#1551520)
Subject: RE: BS: Cartoon Characters who didn't make it.
From: Tannywheeler

Ebbie, I remembered Mighty Mouse, too, coming to save the day. It was operatic, all sung.

Back in the early '50s there was a bakery that delivered in Rockville Center, out on Long Island outside of NYC. Great 7-layer cake and eclairs. In each delivery there was a "comic book" of stories about a prince of something or other who rode around on?/in? a swan(boat). Everything was pretty. Memory's pretty faint. Tw


28 Aug 05 - 12:54 PM (#1551609)
Subject: RE: BS: Cartoon Characters who didn't make it.
From: Little Hawk

I detested Mighty Mouse, for some reason. Well, I'll tell you what is was. I had noticed that there was, for some reason, a conspiracy of prejudice against cats in the cartoons and comics. Cats were being unfairly picked on, abused, and depicted as bad guys by a host of ridiculous, self-righteous, wisecracking mouse characters. I hate that sort of thing. Accordingly, I hated Mighty Mouse with a passion.

But not as much as I hated the fecking ROAD RUNNER!!!!   ARRGH! I wanted to see him die hideously, after being subjected to ever torture and indignity the coyote mind could devise.


28 Aug 05 - 01:01 PM (#1551613)
Subject: RE: BS: Cartoon Characters who didn't make it.
From: Cluin

I could never figure that Roadrunner cartoon out. By the time the Coyote had finished squashing, lasering or blowing-up his intended prey, there'd be fuck-all left to eat. With his credit limit for devices from ACME, why didn't he just order some take-out KFC?


28 Aug 05 - 01:03 PM (#1551616)
Subject: RE: BS: Cartoon Characters who didn't make it.
From: Cluin

Then sit back and wait for the West Nile virus or that new Avian Flu thingy to knock off the roadrunner...


28 Aug 05 - 01:11 PM (#1551623)
Subject: RE: BS: Cartoon Characters who didn't make it.
From: Little Hawk

In the case of the Roadrunner, whose only real purpose was to endlessly tantalize, torture, and frustrate Wile E. Coyote, using any weapon on the little bastard would have been justifiable, including nuclear devices. If Wile E. had decided to just retire to Florida and forget all about the Roadrunner, I'm sure the wretched thing would have gone there after him and started buzzing past his front porch 85 times a day until he snapped. What a stupid cartoon it was.


28 Aug 05 - 01:12 PM (#1551624)
Subject: RE: BS: Cartoon Characters who didn't make it.
From: Cluin

...I'd like to see the coyote eat the road runner
And I'd like to see Knievel blown to bits
I'd like to see Rex Humbard lay his hands upon Maude Aimee
But I'd love to see that Dolly Parton's tits...


    ~McLean & McLean


28 Aug 05 - 01:14 PM (#1551625)
Subject: RE: BS: Cartoon Characters who didn't make it.
From: GUEST,Ron Davies

LH--

You're dead right about the anti-cat prejudice then in cartoons and comics. It was pretty blatant.


28 Aug 05 - 01:17 PM (#1551628)
Subject: RE: BS: Cartoon Characters who didn't make it.
From: Cluin

There was one cartoon where old Wile E. talked and was after Bugs Bunny. He got his ass kicked there too, after proclaiming himself "Wile E. Coyote, Super Genius".

Basically, America (et al) dislikes intellect and loves to see them get their comeuppance. They prefer their bumbling loveable morons. Hence their Comm-in-Chief (minus the loveable part).


28 Aug 05 - 01:18 PM (#1551629)
Subject: RE: BS: Cartoon Characters who didn't make it.
From: Cluin

I dunno. Fritz the Cat got laid a lot. And Top Cat got away with a lot.


28 Aug 05 - 07:27 PM (#1551840)
Subject: RE: BS: Cartoon Characters who didn't make it.
From: The Fooles Troupe

My favourite is Wile E. I collect his stuff, and it is very hard to get her in Australia. He is the continual underdog with a superiority complex - always having to prove just oho clever he is, but he ain't all that bright. A true anti-intellectual. Once read an article in Playboy (see!) about him suing ACME Co. He lost - he wasn't using their gadgets for their intended purposes... just love him!


28 Aug 05 - 07:47 PM (#1551863)
Subject: RE: BS: Cartoon Characters who didn't make it.
From: GUEST,Elmer Fudd

My bwother Thaddeus could never catch a bweak. The bwacklisting duwing the McCawthy ewa weawy hurt his caweer. All because he once scwewed Wonald Weagan's girlfwiend back in the twenties.


28 Aug 05 - 08:22 PM (#1551883)
Subject: RE: BS: Cartoon Characters who didn't make it.
From: Severn

Little known fact:

Poor blacklisted Lickey Louse's last screen appearence before his tragic demise was an uncredited stunt turn in a religious movie called "Sects, Lice & Videotape".

....As for Sucky Tick, I always kinda liked his sidekicks Looney & Spazz and his Country Cousin Russ. And his girlfriend "Lips" was pretty hot!


29 Aug 05 - 04:59 AM (#1552039)
Subject: RE: BS: Cartoon Characters who didn't make it.
From: The Fooles Troupe

We certainly didn't...


29 Aug 05 - 08:59 AM (#1552144)
Subject: RE: BS: Cartoon Characters who didn't make it.
From: Rapparee

Little known fact: Wile E. Coyote was originally Wile E. Coli, and the Road Runner was originally called Lunch Runner. Photographic difficulties (and good taste) required the change to non-microscopic creatures.


29 Aug 05 - 02:16 PM (#1552335)
Subject: RE: BS: Cartoon Characters who didn't make it.
From: GUEST,Mrr

Yes, it is I, Mrrzy. Those of you who remember the 8th man, where did you grow up / where do you remember him from?


29 Aug 05 - 05:50 PM (#1552473)
Subject: RE: BS: Cartoon Characters who didn't make it.
From: Severn

Where have you been Mrrzy? We've been BEGGING for you! We dote on you! ("Mrrzy dotes and dozy dotes and little kids need IVs....." or however that went....)


21 Jan 08 - 02:50 PM (#2241483)
Subject: RE: BS: Cartoon Characters who didn't make it.
From: GUEST

Peter Wheat


21 Jan 08 - 08:33 PM (#2241718)
Subject: RE: BS: Cartoon Characters who didn't make it.
From: SINSULL

I remember Felix:
Felix the cat
The wonderful wonderful cat.
Whenever he gets in a fix
He reaches into his bag of tricks.
Felix the cat
The wonderful wonderful cat,
You'll laugh so much
Your sides will ache
Your heart will go pitter pat
Watching Felix the wonderful cat.

As for Diver Dan:
He moves among creatures of frightening features...
He protects and he guards his friends under the sea
That's where you'll find Diver Dan.

How about Towlie, the druggy towel? Lame at best.


22 Jan 08 - 05:45 PM (#2242378)
Subject: RE: BS: Cartoon Characters who didn't make it.
From: Mrrzy

Can't believe I just found this... thank you for your dotage!


22 Jan 08 - 09:16 PM (#2242517)
Subject: RE: BS: Cartoon Characters who didn't make it.
From: Slag

Does anybody remember Leonardo Lion? King of Bongo Kongo? My baby sister loved that one and I 'd always watch it with her. Curse with a memory that retains just about every useless fact I remember the opening song:
   
   Here comes Leonardo, Leonardo Lion
   King of Bongo Kongo, that hero lion of Iron.
   And there's Odio Cologney who's loyal and true blue
   That royal skunk with skill and spunk comes through to save the day

   I say there's the booming Hunter and wiry, witty Fox
   And Tutor who brings fun to you in Wizard's magic box

   There's Biggy with his pistols and Itchy with his fleas
   They plot against the Kingdom to over throw the King
   But Odio Cologney steps in to change the play
   That royal skunk with skill and spunk comes thru to save the day!

Or something like that.
With regards to Licky Louse, Mr. Krabs is now appearing with Spongebob Squarepants and is doing quite well but Licky would definitely be a more interesting character, IMO.


23 Jan 08 - 09:02 AM (#2242765)
Subject: RE: BS: Cartoon Characters who didn't make it.
From: Rapparee

I always thought Mighty Mouse kinda got it in the shorts.


23 Jan 08 - 10:11 AM (#2242808)
Subject: RE: BS: Cartoon Characters who didn't make it.
From: kendall

I remember Horace Horsecollar,
Henry,
The Little King
Stanley (work horse)
Sparkplug, Barney Google's horse.
Smokey Stover
"Riddles Barlow"
Clara the cow. Had huge nostrils
TNT and Dan the dynamite
The Doll man
The Atom. He used to travel by roller skating on the telephone wires.
Captain America
Battle Brady
Combat Kelly

Most were too silly to survive.


23 Jan 08 - 10:46 AM (#2242836)
Subject: RE: BS: Cartoon Characters who didn't make it.
From: SINSULL

I remember Farmer Gray - Hungarian Rhapsody with cats and mice chasing each other and only occasional dialogue.


23 Jan 08 - 02:17 PM (#2243003)
Subject: RE: BS: Cartoon Characters who didn't make it.
From: Rapparee

Smokey Stover
The Yellow Kid
Buster Brown (who we thought was a pantywaist)
Sergeant Rock of Easy Company
Phoebe Zeitgeist
Barbarella


23 Jan 08 - 03:47 PM (#2243060)
Subject: RE: BS: Cartoon Characters who didn't make it.
From: kendall

The Yellow Kid was the first cartoon character to appear in an American Newspaper.


23 Jan 08 - 04:02 PM (#2243066)
Subject: RE: BS: Cartoon Characters who didn't make it.
From: Amos

Don't forget the Katzenjammer Kids and that crazy brick-throwing alleycat with stripes whos ename I have forgot....



A


23 Jan 08 - 05:56 PM (#2243158)
Subject: RE: BS: Cartoon Characters who didn't make it.
From: Rapparee

Krazy Kat.

There was also "our Boarding House With Major Hoople" and the one about Jiggs and Maggie.


23 Jan 08 - 06:56 PM (#2243199)
Subject: RE: BS: Cartoon Characters who didn't make it.
From: Amos

It's really nice having you around, Rapaire. Every home should be equipped with a big strong clever librarian.


A


23 Jan 08 - 09:48 PM (#2243293)
Subject: RE: BS: Cartoon Characters who didn't make it.
From: Rapparee

Yeah, who has swords.


23 Jan 08 - 10:06 PM (#2243306)
Subject: RE: BS: Cartoon Characters who didn't make it.
From: Donuel

I had a character named Thin Man
He was a super hero in the 2D world since he could turn on one axis and essentially disappear from his other 2 D associates.


23 Jan 08 - 10:42 PM (#2243327)
Subject: RE: BS: Cartoon Characters who didn't make it.
From: bobad

There was the shape shifting, funnel hatted Tom Terrific, and his trusty sidekick Mighty Manfred the Wonder Dog, and their mortal foil Crabby Appleton. Also Gerald McBoing Boing - I wonder what they're up to today?


24 Jan 08 - 03:19 AM (#2243406)
Subject: RE: BS: Cartoon Characters who didn't make it.
From: GUEST

Cool McCool


24 Jan 08 - 09:03 AM (#2243548)
Subject: RE: BS: Cartoon Characters who didn't make it.
From: Rapparee

Don't forget Winky Dink.


24 Jan 08 - 10:25 AM (#2243611)
Subject: RE: BS: Cartoon Characters who didn't make it.
From: GLoux

remember Oil Can Harry, Mighty Mouse's nemesis...

Lippy the Lion and Hardy Har Har?

Who said "Heavens to Mergatroid?"


24 Jan 08 - 12:13 PM (#2243676)
Subject: RE: BS: Cartoon Characters who didn't make it.
From: kendall

Snagglepuss said that.


24 Jan 08 - 12:16 PM (#2243679)
Subject: RE: BS: Cartoon Characters who didn't make it.
From: kendall

Snidely Whiplash
Dudley Dooright
...something Duck, the cockeyed wonder
Sniffles and Mary Jane
Was it Tom Terrific who also had a nemesis called the master cylinder?


24 Jan 08 - 03:58 PM (#2243886)
Subject: RE: BS: Cartoon Characters who didn't make it.
From: kendall

Smiling Jack
Sparkey Watts
Ally Oop
Big Chief Wahoo
The Gren Lanturn
Submariner
Plastic Man
Joe Palooka


24 Jan 08 - 04:42 PM (#2243928)
Subject: RE: BS: Cartoon Characters who didn't make it.
From: GLoux

Clutch Cargo


24 Jan 08 - 05:08 PM (#2243948)
Subject: RE: BS: Cartoon Characters who didn't make it.
From: Rapparee

The Magenta Maggot


24 Jan 08 - 05:20 PM (#2243959)
Subject: RE: BS: Cartoon Characters who didn't make it.
From: john f weldon

Has anyone mentioned Walt Disney's first character, Oswald Rabbit? Walt"s creation was "ripped off" and given to Walter Lantz, of Woody Woodpecker fame, and fell into obscurity.
Walt's second character, Mickey Mouse, was better protected, and is still alive and kicking.
Or, at least, squealing.


24 Jan 08 - 07:20 PM (#2244057)
Subject: RE: BS: Cartoon Characters who didn't make it.
From: kendall

I remember Clutch Cargo. Used to watch it with my girls when we lived in Rockport Mass.(1962)


24 Jan 08 - 07:23 PM (#2244060)
Subject: RE: BS: Cartoon Characters who didn't make it.
From: kendall

The Shield and his sidekick, Dusty
Vigilante. (rode a motorcycle)


24 Jan 08 - 08:36 PM (#2244107)
Subject: RE: BS: Cartoon Characters who didn't make it.
From: Nick E

I have to say I am running about a 96% recognition rate on these guys. SO many posts, and so many things i want to say to most of them, I'm just going to have to let 99.9% of it go.
So here is the other .1% or less...

Winky Dink was a problem because the kids kept drawing on the screen without the plastic sheet that made the show an interactive experience in the late 60's Early 70's

I have a female co-worker, late 40's who admits to a physical attraction to Mighty Mouse.

Surprised no one I noticed has mentioned these borderline individuals...
Marine Boy, Gigantor, Kimba, the White Lion - for animation, or Thunderbunny for comics.

Not surprised no one mentioned these of my own invention...
Enormouse ( Yup a superhero who was a VERY Large Mouse) or The Elephant Lamb, a misunderstood crime solving Victorian Ovine with a bag over it's head.

I love this thread


24 Jan 08 - 08:45 PM (#2244109)
Subject: RE: BS: Cartoon Characters who didn't make it.
From: Rapparee

Winky Dink was '50s, man.


24 Jan 08 - 09:56 PM (#2244160)
Subject: RE: BS: Cartoon Characters who didn't make it.
From: John on the Sunset Coast

Hey guys and girls, if you visit www.toonpedia.com you can get a      
'biography' of many of the characters mentioned above...and many, many more.
Also there are a couple of sites whence one can download, free, old comic books, of all genres, and read them on-screen...though I suppose someone computer savvy could print them out. Caveat, some of the scans are hard to read; some are quite clear. www.goldenagecomics.co.uk is one site that comes to mind.