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BS: qu. for middle aged men ???

GUEST,same bloke as you 01 Jul 06 - 11:55 PM
Bobert 02 Jul 06 - 12:02 AM
Bob Hitchcock 02 Jul 06 - 12:04 AM
John O'L 02 Jul 06 - 12:14 AM
gnomad 02 Jul 06 - 03:56 AM
gnu 02 Jul 06 - 04:56 AM
Dave (the ancient mariner) 02 Jul 06 - 04:57 AM
gnu 02 Jul 06 - 05:04 AM
John MacKenzie 02 Jul 06 - 05:04 AM
John O'L 02 Jul 06 - 06:16 AM
*daylia* 02 Jul 06 - 07:03 AM
Midchuck 02 Jul 06 - 07:11 AM
GUEST,DB 02 Jul 06 - 07:22 AM
Clinton Hammond 02 Jul 06 - 03:04 PM
Liz the Squeak 02 Jul 06 - 03:10 PM
GUEST 02 Jul 06 - 03:29 PM
Folkiedave 02 Jul 06 - 03:31 PM
gnu 02 Jul 06 - 03:34 PM
Dead Horse 02 Jul 06 - 05:22 PM
Dave the Gnome 02 Jul 06 - 05:50 PM
GUEST,Wesley S 02 Jul 06 - 07:43 PM
Bee-dubya-ell 02 Jul 06 - 08:22 PM
Little Hawk 02 Jul 06 - 08:34 PM
Dave (the ancient mariner) 03 Jul 06 - 06:50 AM
manitas_at_work 03 Jul 06 - 07:24 AM
David C. Carter 03 Jul 06 - 07:27 AM
Mr Red 03 Jul 06 - 07:57 AM
*daylia* 03 Jul 06 - 09:11 AM
*daylia* 03 Jul 06 - 09:17 AM
Little Hawk 03 Jul 06 - 09:23 AM
GUEST 03 Jul 06 - 11:17 AM
gnu 03 Jul 06 - 03:37 PM
gnu 03 Jul 06 - 03:41 PM
gnu 03 Jul 06 - 04:08 PM
GUEST,Joe_F 03 Jul 06 - 04:53 PM
Catherine Jayne 03 Jul 06 - 05:09 PM
gnu 03 Jul 06 - 06:57 PM
Liz the Squeak 04 Jul 06 - 05:12 AM
GUEST, Topsie 04 Jul 06 - 06:02 AM
John MacKenzie 04 Jul 06 - 07:30 AM
Liz the Squeak 04 Jul 06 - 07:31 AM
jacqui.c 04 Jul 06 - 07:39 AM
Catherine Jayne 04 Jul 06 - 08:14 AM
John MacKenzie 04 Jul 06 - 08:18 AM
Mr Red 04 Jul 06 - 08:21 AM
John MacKenzie 04 Jul 06 - 08:47 AM
GUEST 04 Jul 06 - 10:08 AM
Big Al Whittle 04 Jul 06 - 10:31 AM
Dave the Gnome 04 Jul 06 - 10:38 AM
John MacKenzie 04 Jul 06 - 10:41 AM
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Subject: BS: qu. for middle aged men ???
From: GUEST,same bloke as you
Date: 01 Jul 06 - 11:55 PM

so you are not as young or fit as you may have been..

50 will be your next big birthday.



so.. are women still a problem. !!!???

would you rather have a quiet sit down
with a damn good old cowboy or war film on the TV

while the mrs is snoring upstairs ..


or be out clubbing it trying to shag young girls ?



this is scientific research.. so behave and don't takre the piss


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Subject: RE: BS: qu. for middle aged men ???
From: Bobert
Date: 02 Jul 06 - 12:02 AM

stick with the mrs....

might of fact, go wake her up slowly... know what I mean???


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Subject: RE: BS: qu. for middle aged men ???
From: Bob Hitchcock
Date: 02 Jul 06 - 12:04 AM

As a 55 year old, I would rather be out chasing women untill 4:00 am but my wife would have a big problem with my doing so. So I just hang out, surf the web and answer stupid questions on Mudcat.


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Subject: RE: BS: qu. for middle aged men ???
From: John O'L
Date: 02 Jul 06 - 12:14 AM

this is scientific research.. so behave and don't takre the piss

Only someone under fifty could expect that to be taken seriously.


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Subject: RE: BS: qu. for middle aged men ???
From: gnomad
Date: 02 Jul 06 - 03:56 AM

Age 52, yes, they're still a problem [never found the right one at the right time, see] but I can watch the film or go out as there has never been a Mrs Gnomad. Lucky that as there's no upstairs here either.

Rather go out and have a bit of music than most of the stuff on TV.

As for going out shagging it and trying to club young girls, well I was crap at it in younger days, I don't suppose I'd be any better now. I think they would see me coming ;-)

Wondered if the title meant queue for m.a.men, wasn't sure whether it was a queue I needed to join, or one for those who might want me. Quite a relief that it was neither.


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Subject: RE: BS: qu. for middle aged men ???
From: gnu
Date: 02 Jul 06 - 04:56 AM

Out at the clubs playing Russian Roulette? Not likely. Been separated / divorced for 7 years. Been celibate for 9 1/2 years. It's really quite simple : no women, no problem.


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Subject: RE: BS: qu. for middle aged men ???
From: Dave (the ancient mariner)
Date: 02 Jul 06 - 04:57 AM

Advice for men 50+ ;-)

a: Never waste a good erection.

b: A good bowel movement is essential, take your time to achieve one every day.

c: If you can get some sleep. sleep.

d: Never waste a good erection (see a:).

e: Eat healthy Colon cereal everyday and drink lots of water(see b:)

f: Naps are essential, if you can sleep, sleep (see c:)

g: If it has tits or tires you are going to have trouble with it, be carefull.

h: Don't waste your time arguing with teenagers, their minds are made up and your opinion doesn't count.

i: The television cannot hear or reply to you, stop shouting at it. (don't worry Sony and RCA are working on a fix for this problem)

j: If your yuppie neighbours are being nice to you, they want something, (probably a babysitter or to borrow your tools or snowblower)

k: It's better to do it for them than lend them something ( and always have a good excuse why you and your wife cannot babysit for them)

l: Never waste a good erection.


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Subject: RE: BS: qu. for middle aged men ???
From: gnu
Date: 02 Jul 06 - 05:04 AM

I am confused... there is such a thing as a bad errection?


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Subject: RE: BS: qu. for middle aged men ???
From: John MacKenzie
Date: 02 Jul 06 - 05:04 AM

As the biblical allocation is 'Three score years and ten', we must assume that middle age is 35, and not 50+.
I mean how many centenarians do you meet these days?
G.
[Who is never going to be 126]


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Subject: RE: BS: qu. for middle aged men ???
From: John O'L
Date: 02 Jul 06 - 06:16 AM

Giok I don't meet many because, being only in my 50's, I tend to hang with a different crowd. When I'm a hundred I expect to know lots of them well.

Am I being overly optimistic?


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Subject: RE: BS: qu. for middle aged men ???
From: *daylia*
Date: 02 Jul 06 - 07:03 AM

Gnu, you must have led a charmed life! Course there's such a thing as a bad erection. WHen my ex was about 8, he was fooling around with a shampoo bottle in the bathtub one day. Getting to know it, in the biblical way, kinda. Well, not kinda -- he got to know it so well he couldn't get off get it off. It was absolutely excruciating! We could hear him from next door, howling away ... and the embarrassment that continued must have been excruciating also.

Lasted a lifetime, as a matter of fact.

He's middle aged now, still steers clear of the beauty parlors.


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Subject: RE: BS: qu. for middle aged men ???
From: Midchuck
Date: 02 Jul 06 - 07:11 AM

I am confused... there is such a thing as a bad errection?

Well, no, but some are better than others...I am often reminded of the old cowboy's complaint:

"I been f***ing so long with a limber dick, I could row a boat with a rope!"

Peter


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Subject: RE: BS: qu. for middle aged men ???
From: GUEST,DB
Date: 02 Jul 06 - 07:22 AM

The prospect of shagging young(ish) girls, or somewhat older women for that matter(!), is not an unattractive one, but experience suggests the following:

(i) It can be difficult to get them to agree (or at least it always was for me).

(ii) If you can get them to agree they then decide that they have a licence to criticise your every little fault. As I have many, many, many, many, many ... many ... 'minor imperfections' this can get a little wearying.

(iii)Being loved passionately one moment then hated equally passionately the next, and then back again, is emotionally draining:

"Her heart was like a Navy shower - from hot to cold in a quarter of an hour"   Cyril Tawney.

As a result of these snags I gave up long ago ...


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Subject: RE: BS: qu. for middle aged men ???
From: Clinton Hammond
Date: 02 Jul 06 - 03:04 PM

"50 will be your next big birthday"
If you're 50, you've been middle aged for 10+ years


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Subject: RE: BS: qu. for middle aged men ???
From: Liz the Squeak
Date: 02 Jul 06 - 03:10 PM

So Manitas is past middle age then... explains the sudden burst of beige clothing and ability to wear a stupid hat regardless of people pointing and laughing....

LTS


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Subject: RE: BS: qu. for middle aged men ???
From: GUEST
Date: 02 Jul 06 - 03:29 PM

There are many middle-aged woman who WISH their men felt up to a good shag: Look Here!


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Subject: RE: BS: qu. for middle aged men ???
From: Folkiedave
Date: 02 Jul 06 - 03:31 PM

As a single bloke of any age there are women to suit.


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Subject: RE: BS: qu. for middle aged men ???
From: gnu
Date: 02 Jul 06 - 03:34 PM

Ah, but if you are a suitor, that's just the beginning.


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Subject: RE: BS: qu. for middle aged men ???
From: Dead Horse
Date: 02 Jul 06 - 05:22 PM

"Her heart was like a Navy shower - from hot to cold in a quarter of an hour"   Cyril Tawney.
Delete "Navy". Insert "Pussers".


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Subject: RE: BS: qu. for middle aged men ???
From: Dave the Gnome
Date: 02 Jul 06 - 05:50 PM

Shag? Young women?

Feck! Arse! Drink!

Oh, bugger you've got me going now...


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Subject: RE: BS: qu. for middle aged men ???
From: GUEST,Wesley S
Date: 02 Jul 06 - 07:43 PM

I'm happily married so young girls are for looking at - nothing else.


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Subject: RE: BS: qu. for middle aged men ???
From: Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 02 Jul 06 - 08:22 PM

I skipped middle-age. I went straight from being a horny young buck to being a dirty old man without breaking stride.


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Subject: RE: BS: qu. for middle aged men ???
From: Little Hawk
Date: 02 Jul 06 - 08:34 PM

50? Hell, that was SEVEN years ago!

Okay, back to the question: are women still a problem?

Yes and no. They're not as frequent a problem. They have receded considerably in overall importance and urgency, in terms of romance. There's still some attendant risk of "falling in love" with one now and then, but it's a far less acute risk than it used to be. When it does happen, however, it's as bad as it ever was, meaning it's the worst f**king problem short of a really nasty terminal illness.

So, yes, I would have to say that women ARE still a problem to some extent.

Other problems are mostly linked to the gradual decline in energy, physical flexibility, and the old "been there, done that, the thrill is gone" syndrome.

If I could snap my fingers (presto!) and have a 25 year old body again...ha! I would do it without hesitation.

Daylia - That thing with the shampoo bottle has probably happened to a great many men. I betcha! ;-) Curiosity is a terrible thing. I heard about one guy who had a nasty incident with a hose type vacuum cleaner! You don't want to hear the gory details. Then there are knotholes in tree trunks...never forget that there may be a squirrel inside there, and she may resent the sudden intrusion upon her peaceful residence and react accordingly. Then there are knotholes in fences...and the vicious dog on the other side! So many perils in this life for the unwary...


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Subject: RE: BS: qu. for middle aged men ???
From: Dave (the ancient mariner)
Date: 03 Jul 06 - 06:50 AM

Knotholes in trees, vacuum cleaners, shampoo bottles? I have not been at sea long enough, stranded on a deserted island long enough. nor have I ever been intoxicated enough, to consider anything like that in my wildest dreams.


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Subject: RE: BS: qu. for middle aged men ???
From: manitas_at_work
Date: 03 Jul 06 - 07:24 AM

" explains the sudden burst of beige clothing and ability to wear a stupid hat regardless of people pointing and laughing..."

yeah, well I was feeling left out when we went out as a family


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Subject: RE: BS: qu. for middle aged men ???
From: David C. Carter
Date: 03 Jul 06 - 07:27 AM

It's hard to imagine what kind of "foreplay", is required with a vacuum cleaner!Or do you just have to finger the correct button?

Sucking The Mop.


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Subject: RE: BS: qu. for middle aged men ???
From: Mr Red
Date: 03 Jul 06 - 07:57 AM

in my experience (29 and holding) it don't get any easier the older you get. And I am not talking about sex.

an embarrassment of riches is always a problem if you have a conscience - but as for younger woman? I heard it said that women 14 years younger than men is quite a norm for born again bachelors. That's me normal for once in my life.

Having said that I escorted (in the nicest most honerable way) an elderly lass to a singaround last year so I could collect a song or two and she was in her element, a young beau at her side. Only much later did I realise that her boyfriend is two years younger than me. Gulp. Mind you I have weathered a bit better.


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Subject: RE: BS: qu. for middle aged men ???
From: *daylia*
Date: 03 Jul 06 - 09:11 AM

If I could snap my fingers (presto!) and have a 25 year old body again...ha! I would do it without hesitation.

I'd hesitate just long enough to find out if I'd have to accept the brain that matched that bod again. If I could keep what I know now, presto indeed! If not, I'll keep the gray hairs thanks.   At 48 I have just as much energy as ever - or more! - and I'm a lot happier, more satisfied too.

Healthier as well. When I turned 25 my oldest son was almost 6, my twins had just celebrated their first birthday. I was just overwhelmed with responsibilities - 48 private music students/week, 3 little kids, and a new husband (who was more like an overgrown kid). I had post-partum depression which lasted for years -- in my 25 year old brilliance, I'd made it worse by starving myself (I was determined not to gain weight). I remember -- breakfast+lunch used to = one hard-boiled egg and a piece of toast. No butter, no jam. No nuthin.

I was exhausted for about 5 years .... and I wouldn't do all that again for a million bucks! Thanks for listening, and sorry, I'm on the wrong thread here I think. This is a guy's thread.

Pardon me!


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Subject: RE: BS: qu. for middle aged men ???
From: *daylia*
Date: 03 Jul 06 - 09:17 AM

PS -- Only a hoser could fall in love with a vacuum cleaner, I think. Or maybe not ... suckers!!


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Subject: RE: BS: qu. for middle aged men ???
From: Little Hawk
Date: 03 Jul 06 - 09:23 AM

Men don't fall in love with vacuum cleaners...they lust after them briefly...usually quite briefly. And, yes, you have to be a complete idiot to stick it in a vacuum cleaner.

Shane? You listening to any of this?


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Subject: RE: BS: qu. for middle aged men ???
From: GUEST
Date: 03 Jul 06 - 11:17 AM

gnu=Schopenhauer


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Subject: RE: BS: qu. for middle aged men ???
From: gnu
Date: 03 Jul 06 - 03:37 PM

Arthur Schopenhauer? 1788-1860. The guy that said the will to live is the fundamental reality, and, as such, the constant striving which cannot be satiated ultimately and inevitablby brings only suffering?

Could be. I dunno.


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Subject: RE: BS: qu. for middle aged men ???
From: gnu
Date: 03 Jul 06 - 03:41 PM

... satiated, ultimately...

Sorry, I was thinking about sex.


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Subject: RE: BS: qu. for middle aged men ???
From: gnu
Date: 03 Jul 06 - 04:08 PM

Actually, the original reads okay. Perhaps I comma too quick.


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Subject: RE: BS: qu. for middle aged men ???
From: GUEST,Joe_F
Date: 03 Jul 06 - 04:53 PM

ObSongs: Way down south in the sycamore timber, If you can't get it hard, stick it in limber. Ala boogy, that's all I crave.

--- Joe Fineman    joe_f@verizon.net

||: For axolotls & humans growing up is a desperate remedy. :||


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Subject: RE: BS: qu. for middle aged men ???
From: Catherine Jayne
Date: 03 Jul 06 - 05:09 PM

I married a man 35 years older than me not sure what that says about either of us though!!


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Subject: RE: BS: qu. for middle aged men ???
From: gnu
Date: 03 Jul 06 - 06:57 PM

I think it means you are in love. Congrats. Not everyone finds love. You are very lucky. Treasure it.


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Subject: RE: BS: qu. for middle aged men ???
From: Liz the Squeak
Date: 04 Jul 06 - 05:12 AM

I don't actually posses any beige clothing. Shades of coffee, terracotta, cream and ivory yes.. but no beige.

LTS


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Subject: RE: BS: qu. for middle aged men ???
From: GUEST, Topsie
Date: 04 Jul 06 - 06:02 AM

And my clothes are the colour of pale biscuits, honey and Cotswold stone - it's everyone else who is wearing beige.


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Subject: RE: BS: qu. for middle aged men ???
From: John MacKenzie
Date: 04 Jul 06 - 07:30 AM

Sitting on the dock of the beige, huh?
G.


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Subject: RE: BS: qu. for middle aged men ???
From: Liz the Squeak
Date: 04 Jul 06 - 07:31 AM

Just starting our own version of Beigewatch.

LTS


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Subject: RE: BS: qu. for middle aged men ???
From: jacqui.c
Date: 04 Jul 06 - 07:39 AM

I think I need help - I just found some beige in my wardrobe.....


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Subject: RE: BS: qu. for middle aged men ???
From: Catherine Jayne
Date: 04 Jul 06 - 08:14 AM

No beige in either my wardrobe or Micca's, we must be doing well!!! *G*


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Subject: RE: BS: qu. for middle aged men ???
From: John MacKenzie
Date: 04 Jul 06 - 08:18 AM

From someone who wears a lot of black I don't find that surprising KJP!
G. ¦¬]


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Subject: RE: BS: qu. for middle aged men ???
From: Mr Red
Date: 04 Jul 06 - 08:21 AM

No beige here - though I had a nasty dream last night and thought I had been cast up on a dessert island & all my clothes had turned dark red.

I woke up when I realised I had been marrooned


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Subject: RE: BS: qu. for middle aged men ???
From: John MacKenzie
Date: 04 Jul 06 - 08:47 AM

That is one post I wish I hadn't red all over!
G


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Subject: RE: BS: qu. for middle aged men ???
From: GUEST
Date: 04 Jul 06 - 10:08 AM

correct, gnu

"Sex, does not hesitate to intrude with its trash, and to interfere with the negotiations of statesmen and the investigations of the learned. Every day it destroys the most valuable relationships. Indeed, it robs of all conscience those who were previously honorable and upright."


reminds me of (y)gnu


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Subject: RE: BS: qu. for middle aged men ???
From: Big Al Whittle
Date: 04 Jul 06 - 10:31 AM

Just read through all this lot. I've forgotten what the question was now.

I do think you get more detached as you get older. By the time your 're in your 20's the hormones aren't driving you crazy like they do when you're 16. I expect the guys who worried a lot about sex in their 20's are still worrying about it.

The things that really piss me off, is the stuff I didn't achieve - like guitar playing. I always wanted to be really good - not just some asshole that tries hard. i worried about that in my 20's - drives me nuts now, because I know I never will do it. In fact I'll probably start getting worse before too long.

Like Paul Simon says,....after changes we are more or less the same...


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Subject: RE: BS: qu. for middle aged men ???
From: Dave the Gnome
Date: 04 Jul 06 - 10:38 AM

Nah - Missus and telly for me anyday. I remember the days of shagging and clubing. Trouble was everyone talked about it but no-one actualy did!

The other thing I have notcied about getting older is that I am getting stronger as well. Whan I used to get an erection 30 years ago I couldn't bend it. It's dead easy now...

:D (tG)


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Subject: RE: BS: qu. for middle aged men ???
From: John MacKenzie
Date: 04 Jul 06 - 10:41 AM

Or as Alphonse Karr(1808-1890) said long before Paul Simon.

"Plus c'est la meme chose, plus ça change"

Giok


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