Folk songs appropriate for medical students

Subject: RE: Folk songs appropriate for medical students
From: beeliner
Date: 21 Nov 09 - 11:19 PM

It's kind of a long thread, so I might have missed it, but did anyone mention "Oh Doctor" by Malvina Reynolds, on the "Another County Heard From" album?

---

Thread closed because it's been a target for a heavy barrage of Spam. If you have something to add to the discussion, feel free to start a new thread on this topic.
-Joe Offer-

Subject: RE: Folk songs appropriate for medical students
From: Sandra in Sydney
Date: 21 Nov 09 - 10:31 PM

a few songs here -
Lyr Add: The Colorectal Surgeon's Song- see Haruo's initial post for the title song 'Working where the sun don't shine' aka The Colorectal Surgeon's Song

Bob Bolton's post of 10 Mar 04 - 11:51 PM for 'Rectal Bleeding Calypso' Words & Music ©: John Dengate

Clinton Hammond's post of 30 Jan 05 - 04:47 PM for chords

I'll try to get copies of John Dengate's other medical masterpieces "Solar Melanoma Blues" (tune - Nobody loves you when you're down and out) & "Because I neglected dental hygiene" (sung thru his new dentures!)

sandra

Subject: Nice to meet all of you
From: GUEST,SoundJohn
Date: 21 Nov 09 - 07:43 PM

Hey! Thanx for this beautiful place of the Inet!!

Subject: RE: Folk songs appropriate for medical students
From: GUEST,Edthefolkie
Date: 07 Oct 09 - 06:19 PM

Hey thanks Robd, it 's great to see the words of "Terrible Operation Blues". That takes me back a bit, Georgia Tom's version (was there a lady on it too?) made me larf out loud when I first heard it.

Got it on vinyl or tape somewhere but I can't remember what, when, where or how! MIGHT be on a Mike Raven compilation album (Mike used to do a blues programme on BBC radio 40 years ago)

Subject: RE: Folk songs appropriate for medical students
From: sing4peace
Date: 06 Oct 09 - 08:30 PM

Here's one my Dad wrote to the tune of "The Rickets Hornpipe"

Rickets, berri-berri and pellagra too
Can be caused by not enough of vitamins in you
Lousy vision after dark
And even colds and flu
These symptoms can be caused they say
By lack of vitamins in you.

You may think you're having fun
But without the vitamin [pronounced vita-mun]
Your bones get soft they start to itch
Your ankles weigh a ton
So if you have to go to sea for any length of time
Be sure that once a week
You get to eat
a carrot and a lime.

Forget about psychiatry and don't go on a binge
Eat a navel or a temple or valencia orange.

----

(Yes! that does rhyme the word orange. Anybody who knew Jody Gibson knew that you just couldn't tell him a thing couldn't be done without him setting about to prove you wrong.)

--

Joyce

Subject: RE: Folk songs appropriate for medical students
From: GUEST,fantum
Date: 06 Oct 09 - 08:13 AM

PILLS OF WHITE MERCURY straight out of the database

Subject: RE: Folk songs appropriate for medical students
From: Gweltas
Date: 05 Oct 09 - 08:14 PM

How about "Lily The Pink" and her wonderful "Medicinal Compound " ??

Subject: RE: Folk songs appropriate for medical students
From: Jack Campin
Date: 05 Oct 09 - 07:46 PM

Tom Lehrer's song about the epidemiology of STDs: I Got It From Agnes.

Subject: Terrible Operation Blues,RE: for medical students
From: robd
Date: 05 Oct 09 - 06:52 PM

So sad I missed this one, but since these threads may yet serve a useful purpose someday. And, a quick search of the site finds only a single mention of the song, but no words. I first heard Magpie sing it, and they credited Homer Clemons and his Texas Swing Billies.


TERRIBLE OPERATION BLUES
Thomas A. Dorsey aka. Georgia Tom - 1930

Bring in the next patient, nurse

Get up on this table, pull off that gown
Raise up that right leg, let that left one down
Pull off them stockings, that silk underwear
The doctor's got to cut you, mama, don't know where
You got two or three tumors, shaped like a cube
Two or three leaks in your inner tube
Bring on that ether, bring on that gas
The doctor's got to cut you, mama, yas, yas, yas
The doctor knows to fix it, the doctor knows just what to do

Oh doctor, can I have a glass of water?
Oh, not now
Oh doctor, I'm so sick!
Sh, be quiet, doctor ain't gonna hurt you
Oh, what you gonna do with that long knife?
Oh, that's just the doctor's tools
Oh doctor, what you gon' do with that saw?
Oh, we take off legs with that, that's all
Ooooh!
Be quiet, now, just a moment
There you are, the doctor's through!
Oh doctor, what did you take out of me?
Oh, just a minute, I'll tell you, dear

Four monkey wrenches, two horse-shay
Pair of old britches and a bale of hay
Your ribs were kinda loosened, they moved about
If I hadn't sewed you up, everything woulda fell out
I put in new tubes, tightened up the exhaust
Went into your hood and cleaned your spark plugs off
Your body's kinda weak, don't be hard
From now on you'll be careful with them there connection rods
Alright, doctor!

The doctor knows to fix it, the doctor knows just what to do
Gee, doctor, but I feel better
That so?
Yes, I feel kinda like I wanna do a little messin' 'round
Fine, go ahead!
Ooooh, my my my my
That's the way patients do that come to this hospital

Your body's kinda weak, don't be hard
From now on you'll be careful with them there connection rods
Alright, doctor!
The doctor knows to fix it, the doctor knows just what to do

Subject: RE: Folk songs appropriate for medical students
From: breezy
Date: 21 Nov 05 - 03:45 AM

'Transplant calypso' written awhile ago by Jeremy taylor doesnt appear to have been mentioned here

Jeremy -who had a big hit with 'Ag Pleez deddy' - will be appearing at the Windward Folk club at the Comfort Hotel in St Albans UK on Sunday 27th Nov 2005

on Fri 25th it'll be george papavgeris

Subject: Lyr Add: A NOTE OF THANKS TO DR. REES
From: Howard Kaplan
Date: 20 Nov 05 - 09:30 PM

Five years and ten months ago (January 2000), Marymac90 posted this paragraph:

I was looking to see if I had a recording by some male member of People's Music Network of an extremely funny song describing a proctoscopic examination, but I don't think I do. Perhaps it wasn't so much the lyrics as the ASL interpretation, but it had us all ROTFL.

I found her posting today while following links from another thread ("Where can I buy leeches & medical songs"), and I am pleased to be able to provide more details. I wrote A Note of Thanks to Dr. Rees in 1994, and you can click on the link to find a lead sheet and a MIDI file of the melody. Here are just the lyrics:

Doctor Rees (colon): I'm writing this letter
To thank you for what I have recently learned.
After our talk, I now understand better.
That would not be so, had you not been concerned.
Needing more facts, I perused the collection
The library keeps; I found quite a good book.
So now, I know much about rectal inspection,
Though rectums are places I rarely need look.

When we succeed with this change we've been trying,
When few folk will smoke, through persuasion and laws,
We'll see a change in statistics of dying,
With lung cancer being a less prominent cause.
Next behind lungs on the list as a locus
Where tumours develop, in rich lands like these,
Are rectum and colon, and so we must focus
On them, in our work of preventing disease.

Some say it helps to consume much more fibre
And rarely eat Häagen-Dazs, lamb chops, or Brie;
Those vegetarians I've met in cyber-
Space out on the Internet tend to agree.
But, for the millions who won't change their diet,
Although that would also be good for the heart,
There is a technique, if they're willing to try it,
That often ensures no malignancies start.

The flexible sigmoidoscope was invented
To enter our guts through the holes in their ends
Where feces well coloured and gases ill scented
Both exit the body. It threads through the bends
In the sigmoid, the part of the colon just over
The rectum that's shaped like an "S", and can go
Inside the left colon. It's used to discover
Conditions for which, perhaps, no symptoms show.

Polyps are growths that should not be occurring.
The ones in the bowel, when young, are benign,
But they can enlarge, and there's danger deferring
Removal, because, when they're old, they malign.
Most bowel polyps, statistics have shown us,
Are found near the sigmoid. A primary care
Physician can look for them, and, as a bonus,
Remove them, by using a scope and a snare.

Fibres bring outside light in to illumine;
An image is focused on fibres of glass.
Three millimetres wide, there's enough room in
The biopsy channel for thin tools to pass.
One has a loop on its end, which is tightened
To snare polyps' bases, then current's applied,
And heat cuts their stalks as the flesh becomes whitened.
A biopsy's made from the parts that weren't fried.

And so, Doctor Rees, thanks again for these verses
That I'd not have written without your request.
We, who must visit physicians and nurses,
Should try to keep current with what they suggest.
As it ascends, up that slippery slope in
The base of my gut, every three years or two,
When I feel the flexible sigmoidoscope in
My rectum, I'll surely be thinking of you.

Subject: RE: Folk songs appropriate for medical students
From: GUEST,Sean
Date: 12 Dec 03 - 05:11 AM

The Humours of whiskey
Tippin it up to Nancy

Subject: Lyr Add: THE FUNNY FARM (Homer & Jethro)
From: Jim Dixon
Date: 12 Dec 03 - 12:40 AM

Lyrics transcribed from the sound file at http://www.geocities.com/u2page6/

THE FUNNY FARM (tune: When Johnny Comes Marching Home)
(As sung by Homer & Jethro)

I took a short vacation on my doctor's good advice.
Four men in white escorted me. They treated me so nice.
They strapped me in a jacket till I couldn't move an arm,
An' now I am patient out at the funny farm.

CHORUS: The nurses drink. The doctors drink. The patients do the same.
While we are psychoanalyzed, we sip our pink champagne.
Before I'd sell my padded cell, I'd amputate my arm.
I'd be a lunatic to ever leave the funny farm.

I can't help feelin' sorry for the guy right next to me.
He thinks that he's a refrigerator, strange as it may be.
The doctors don't believe it an' I think that he's a fake,
But when he opens up his mouth, the light keeps me awake. CHORUS

A guy thinks he's a chicken, but I'm sure that he is wrong.
He sits out in the chicken coop an' cackles all day long.
The doctor never tries to cure him though he begs and begs,
For they get sixty cents a dozen when they sell the eggs. CHORUS

[Recorded by Homer & Jethro on "Fractured Folk Songs," 1964; and "The Playboy Song," 1968.]

Subject: Lyr Add: ANYBODY ILL?
From: GUEST,Q
Date: 21 Jan 03 - 05:09 PM

Lyr. Add: ANYBODY ILL?

I am a learned surgeon, and my name is Doctor Quack,
My draughts and pills, to cure your ills, I carry on my back,
My med'cines are the nastiest that ever cured a pain,
If once you've tasted them I know you'd ne'er be ill again.

Chorus:
Then oh, my! Anybody ill, anybody ill,
Anybody ill, oh my Hi!
I'm Doctor Quack, quack, quack-a-ka-quack,I cure you of any attack,
I've syrup of squills and I've camomile pills,
And my name is Doctor Quack.

I've lotions for the measles and I've powders for the croup.
I cure the girls of whooping cough by taking off their hoop,
My plaisters are so very strong, they draw out all your teeth,
And last week drew a ton of coals from here to Hampstead Heath.

I've pills for the complexion if you rub it in at night,
If you've been red as beetroot, in the morning you'll be white,
They'll cure a smoky fire and take away the kettle's boil,
They're made of railway grease and soap, Dutch cheese and castor oil.

I've got a syrup you can take for tooth ache in the nose,
I've powders for a wooden arm, and pills for timber toes.
I stop the mouths of scolding wives, their double teeth I draw,
I clap a padlock on their tongues which makes them hold their jaw.

I've ointment for a mother-in-law, she swallows half a pound,
She'll never trouble you again for she will sleep so sound,
Who'll have a gross of leeches? Shall I put them on your back?
You won't- then he must go elsewhere to trade, must Doctor Quack.

I've heard a doctor sing this to MacNamara's Band, and do the chorus with a little music hall-minstrel hop. Quite funny.

Bodleian Library, printed by R. March, 1881-1884, Firth b.28(4a/b)

Subject: RE: Folk songs appropriate for medical students
From: Santa
Date: 21 Jan 03 - 02:58 PM

Strawhead tend to end their act with a rousing rendition of "Here's to the Colo-Rectal Surgeon" complete with gestures that really cannot be repeated on a family forum.

The chorus goes something like

"Here's to the Colo-Rectal Surgeon,
Misunderstood and much-maligned
Slaving away in the heart of darkness
Working where the sun don't shine."

The verses are fortunately gone beyond recall.....but they certainly amused the medical member of this family (and the non-medical ones).

Subject: Lyr Add: COCONUT (Harry Nilsson)
From: Arkie
Date: 21 Jan 03 - 12:31 AM

COCONUT
Harry Nilsson

Brother bought a coconut. He bought it for a dime.
His sister had another one. She paid it for a lime.

She put the lime in the coconut. She drank them both up.
She put the lime in the coconut. She drank them both up.
She put the lime in the coconut. She drank them both up.
She put the lime in the coconut. She called the doctor, woke him up

And said, "Doctor, ain't there nothin' I can take?"
I say, "Doctor, to relieve this belly ache?"
I say, "Doctor, ain't there nothin' I can take,"
I say, "Doctor, to relieve this belly ache?"
"Now let me get this straight:

"Put the lime in the coconut. You drank them both up.
Put the lime in the coconut. You drank them both up.
Put the lime in the coconut. You drank them both up.
Put the lime in the coconut. You called your doctor, woke him up,

And say, "Doctor, ain't there nothing I can take?"
I say, "Doctor, to relieve this belly ache?"
I say, "Doctor, doctor, ain't there nothin' I can take?"
I say, "Doctor, dooooctor, to relieve this belly ache?"

Put the lime in the coconut. Drink them both together.
Put the lime in the coconut, then you feel better.
Put the lime in the coconut. Drink them both up.
Put the lime in the coconut and call me in the morning.

Wouh wouh wouh wouh wouh.
Brother bought a coconut. He bought it for a dime.
His sister had another one. she paid it for a lime.

She put the lime in the coconut. She drank them both up.
She put the lime in the coconut. She called the doctor, woke him up.

Say, "Doctor, ain't there nothin' I can take?"
I say, "Doctor, to relieve this belly ache?"
I say, "Doctor, ain't there nothin' I can take?"
I say "Doctor! Let me get this straight:

"You put the lime in the coconut, drink them both up.
You put the lime in the coconut, drink them both up.
You put the lime in the coconut, drink them both up.
Put the lime in the coconut. you such a silly woman!,

Put the lime in the coconut. Drink them both together.
Put the lime in the coconut, t ain't there nothing I can take hen you feel better.
Put the lime in the coconut. Drink them both down.
Put the lime in the coconut, and call me in the morning."

"Woo Woo, ain't there nothin' you can take?" I say,
"Woo Woo, to relieve my belly ache?"
You say, "woo woo, ain't there nothin' I can take?" I say,
"Woo woo, to relieve your belly ache?"

You say, "yah yah, ain't there nothin' I can take?" I say,
"Waah waah, to relieve this belly ache?"
I say, "Doctor, ain't there nothin' I can take?"
I say, "Doctor, ain't there nothin' I can take?"
I say, "Doctor, ain't there nothin' I can take?"
I say, "Doctor, you such a silly woman!,

"Put the lime in the coconut. Drink them both together.
Put the lime in the coconut, then you feel better.
Put the lime in the coconut. Drink them both up.
Put the lime in the coconut, and call me in the moooooorning.

"Yes, you call me in the morning,
If you call me in the morning, then X5

Subject: RE: Folk songs appropriate for medical students
From: Susanne (skw)
Date: 20 Jan 03 - 07:56 PM

Rapaire, I've heard it sung by Nancy Nicolson, but have been looking for a recording for years without success. 'Burke and Hare' on Robin Laing's Edinburgh Skyline CD is a different song.

Subject: RE: Folk songs appropriate for medical students
From: Rapparee
Date: 20 Jan 03 - 04:54 PM

Someone has probably set this to music, since it was popular eith the children of the time:

Up the close and down the stair
But and ben w' Burke and Hare
Burke's the butcher Hare's the thief
And Knox's the boy who buys the beef.

Subject: RE: Folk songs appropriate for medical students
From: Nogs
Date: 20 Jan 03 - 02:03 PM

the wordsto the song that northfolk was referring to above 4/28/98 can be found at http://www.joelmabus.com/1097_lyrics.htm#druggist

Subject: RE: Folk songs appropriate for medical students
From: kytrad (Jean Ritchie)
Date: 06 Jul 02 - 06:03 PM

I haven't time to read all above carefully, but I don't think this one was mentioned: "Pretty Sally," and old ballad often sung by Horton Barker, and a beauty. Sad, though.

Another which I used to sing for medical students- it always made them laugh: Leadbelly's, "Irene, Goodnight," which has the verse:

I love Irene, God knows I do,
Love'er till till the seas run dry-
But if Irene turn'er back on me,
I'll take morphine and die!

Subject: RE: Folk songs appropriate for medical students
From: GUEST,Erin
Date: 05 Jul 02 - 07:30 PM

I THINK I've read all the entries so far....and I didn't see the following parody of "Side By Side" (some people know it as "Oh, We Ain't Got a Barrel of Money")

Well, I got married last Friday
My new wife stood beside me
When the guests had all gone
We stood alone
Side by Side

We really knew we were wed then
So we got ready for bed then
When her false teeth and hair
She laid on a chair
Side by Side

One tin leg to follow,
one glass eye so small
Then she unscrewed her left arm
And put it on the chair by the wall

Well, here I stand broken hearted
Most of my wife has departed
So I slept by the chair
There was more of her there
Side by Side

Subject: RE: Folk songs appropriate for medical students
From: GUEST,Argenine
Date: 05 Jul 02 - 03:48 PM

Jeanie, thanks for that Cole Porter song! The man had a way with words, din't 'e?

Subject: RE: Folk songs appropriate for medical students
From: Deda
Date: 04 Jul 02 - 03:53 PM

A fun thread! The one just above it when I opened it was "falorum dingdorum" (from "Maids when you're young") which has some great lyrics for anatomy students.

Subject: RE: Folk songs appropriate for medical students
From: Mark Cohen
Date: 04 Jul 02 - 02:07 PM

Here's the original, and the tune: Fair Margaret and Sweet William, Child 74 (page includes MIDI). The tune is apparently one of two versions collected by Cecil Sharp.

Aloha,
Mark

Subject: Lyr add: Sir John and the Magic Castle
From: Mark Cohen
Date: 04 Jul 02 - 01:53 PM

Here's one that I wrote when I was a medical student. I don't believe I've posted them before. It's a parody of "Fair Margaret and Sweet William", which I believe is a Child ballad; I'll leave it to Masato or one of the other scholars to figure out which! Warning: not for the faint-hearted.

[A brief explanation: My medical school, Penn State U.'s Hershey Medical Center, was a gleaming white building that was built in the middle of a cornfield outside Hershey, Pennsylvania (Chocolate Town, USA), so from a distance it really does look a bit like a magic castle. Anyone who's been to a major medical center won't need any more explanation of the song. Oh...3rd and 4th year medical students in the hospital were called "clinical clerks".]

SIR JOHN AND THE MAGIC CASTLE
lyrics (c)1976 Mark Cohen, tune trad (Fair Margaret and Sweet William)

Sir John awoke on a gray morning, he felt so terribly bad
"I have a pain in my belly," he said, "the worst I've ever had"

He dragged himself out of his bed and found his friend William Brown
"Oh, take me to that white castle now, that stands in Hershey Town"

"Oh have no fear, Sir John dear friend, oh have no fear" said he
"I'll take you to that magic castle now, and better you'll soon be"

"Oh take me there with haste, my friend, for I am terribly sore"
He gave a cry that cracked the sky, and then he gave one more

They rode so fast and they rode so far, the castle soon they spied
But they had to go through a twisted maze, before they got inside

The signs they misdirected them, the door was very well hid
Sir John stopped once to bring up his lunch, and was quite glad he did

At last they came upon the door, but when they stepped within
A demon there was sitting in a chair, on its face an evil grin

"Oh demon what want you of us?" said William bold and brave
"My friend Sir John is so very ill, he's almost in his grave"

"It is not much I want of you," the demon said with a smirk
"Your name, your age, your next of kin, where you live, and where you work

Then you must fill out all these forms, and press full hard with your pen
Sign here, and here, and also here" -- Sir John threw up again

They took Sir John into a room, and thirteen people came in
And each one had a different idea of what was wrong with him

Said one, "Let's have him swallow this tube, and then I'll look within"
Said another, "No, the only way we'll know is by opening up his skin"

Then up there spoke a third-year clerk: "Sir, when was your last stool?"
"Why, four days ago," said good Sir John, "and I'm regular, as a rule"

The clerk then donned his rubber glove, the rest you surely can guess
Said a happy Sir John, "Of all you wise men here, this young one is the best"

I'll end my story here and now, but please remember my friend
The third-year clerk who saved the day, with a finger in...The End

Aloha,
Mark

Subject: RE: Folk songs appropriate for medical students
From: GUEST,Martin Ryan
Date: 04 Jul 02 - 09:01 AM

Kevin Barry

Regards

Subject: RE: Folk songs appropriate for medical students
From: GUEST,another guest
Date: 03 Jul 02 - 11:07 PM

Paddy Kelly's brew---verse 2 It will cure the rheumatism it will cure a wheezy chest it will cure away the gout and gallstones too toothach headache backache losing hair and all the rest fallen arches corns and bunions and the flu.

and it tastes as sweet as honey as it trickles down your throat its pure and clear its just like mountain dew it would make a fellow sing tho he didnt have a note wont you try a drop of Paddy Kelly's brew

Subject: RE: Folk songs appropriate for medical students
From: maire-aine
Date: 03 Jul 02 - 09:00 PM

Miss Fogarty's Christmas Cake, maybe. "It could kill a man twice after eatin' a slice...."

Subject: RE: Folk songs appropriate for medical students
From: Jim Dixon
Date: 03 Jul 02 - 07:18 PM

See DOCTOR BROWN.

Subject: RE: Folk songs appropriate for medical students
From: Genie
Date: 29 Jun 02 - 11:25 PM

For cardiologists:
How Can You Mend A Broken Heart?

For Pharmacists:
Love Potion Number Nine

For Dermatologists:
Poison Ivy

For Psychiatrists:
Me and My Shadow ... not a soul to tell our troubles to...
You're Just In Love (Irving Berlin) : "I hear singing and there's no one there; I smell blossoms and the trees are bare; All day long I seem to walk on air. I wonder why...

Subject: RE: Folk songs appropriate for medical students
From: Genie
Date: 29 Jun 02 - 11:17 PM

For patients who've just been stabbed with a hypodermic:

"I've got you under my skin..."

Then there's the classic "Found a peanut." Among the umpteen kazillion verses, you find:

"It was rotten (x3) just now...
"Ate it anyhow (x3) just now ...
"'Pendicitis (x3) just now...
"Operattion (x3) just now...
"Died anyway (x3) just now... (etc.)

Genie

Subject: RE: Folk songs appropriate for medical students
From: GUEST,JTT
Date: 29 Jun 02 - 08:16 PM

In haste - I haven't read the whole thread, so sorry if this is a repeat:

Oh doctor, oh doctor, oh Dr De Jong
Your cod liver oil is so sweet and so strong
Oh Dr De Jong, I'll go down in the soil
If my wife don't stop drinking your cod-liver oil

and many other bawdy verses.

Subject: RE: Folk songs appropriate for medical students
From: Donuel
Date: 29 Jun 02 - 06:44 PM

The TV show Scrubs has had lots of digusting medical school songs.

Subject: Lyr Add: THE PHYSICIAN (Cole Porter)
From: Jeanie
Date: 29 Jun 02 - 06:36 PM

As we've moved into "non-folk," here's "THE PHYSICIAN," music and lyrics by Cole Porter, recorded by Gertrude Lawrence 1933:

Once I loved such a shattering physician,
Quite the best looking doctor in the state.
And his bedside manner was great.
When I'd gaze up and see him there above me,
Looking less like a doctor than a Turk,
I was tempted to whisper, "Do you love me,
Or do you merely love your work?"

He said by bronchial tubes were entrancing,
My epiglottis filled him with glee,
He simply loved my larynx
And went wild about my pharynx,
Be he never said he loved me.

He said my epidermis was darling,
And found my blood as blue as could be,
We went through wild ecstatics
When I showed him my lymphatics,
But he never said he loved me.

And though, no doubt,
It was not very smart of me,
I kept on a-wracking my soul
To figure out
Why he loved every part of me,
And yet not me as a whole.

With my esophagus he was ravished,
Enthusiastic to a degree,
He said 'twas just enormous,
My appendix vermiformis,
But he never said he loved me.

He said my cerebellum was brilliant,
And my cerebrum far from N.G.,
I know he thought a lotta
My medulla oblongata,
But he never said he loved me.

He said my maxillaries were marvels,
And found my sternum stunning to see,
He did a double hurdle
When I shook my pelvic girdle,
But he never said he loved me.

He seemed amused
When he first made a test of me
To further his medical art,
Yet he refused
When he'd fix up the rest of me,
To cure that ache in my heart.

I know he thought my pancreas perfect,
And for my spleen was keen as could be,
He said of all his sweeties
I'd the sweetest diabetes,
But he never said he loved me.

He said my vertebrae were "sehr schoene,"
And called my coccyx "plus que gentil,"
He murmured "molta bella"
When I sat on his patella,
But he never said he loved me.

He took a fleeting look at my thorax,
And started singing slightly off-key,
He cried, "My Heaven strike us",
When I played my umbilicus,
But he never said he loved me.

As it was dark,
I suggested we walk about
Before he returned to his post.
Once in the park,
I induced him to talk about
The thing I wanted the most.

He lingered on with me until morning,
Yet when I tried to pay him his fee,
He said, "Why, don't be funny,
It is I who owe you money,"
But he never said he loved me.

Some of the cranial nerve mnemonics listed above would have been a lot easier to learn than the one were taught at school for 'O' Level Human Biology:
"Old opticians occasionally trot triumphantly around fairs auctioning green vases and hydrangeas" - I always thought the actual names of the nerves would have been easier to remember than that sentence!

- jeanie

HTML line breaks added. --JoeClone, 1-Jul-02.

Subject: RE: Folk songs appropriate for medical students
From: Genie
Date: 28 Jun 02 - 10:13 PM

I know it's not a folk song, but Miss Adelaide's Lament (from Guys and Dolls) is perfect for med students.  Miss Adelaide (Sky Masterson's moll) keeps reading medical textbook descriptions of "post nasal drip" and other sinus cavity ailments and their relation to socio-emotional issues.  Each verse of these descriptions ends with

"in other words, ...
a person can develop a cold."

Then there's another non-folk one that's relevant:
"Doctor, Doctor, gimme the news!<BR>
I gotta bad case o' lovin' you!"

Subject: RE: Folk songs appropriate for medical students
From: redcogs
Date: 28 Jun 02 - 05:28 PM

How about 'Digging graves is my delight a digging graves for you to lie in every morning every night I makes me living from the dying

Subject: RE: Folk songs appropriate for medical students
From: Genie
Date: 28 Jun 02 - 05:24 PM

Isn't there a punk or grunge band called "Smegma?"

Subject: RE: Folk songs appropriate for medical students
From: Cappuccino
Date: 28 Jun 02 - 04:37 PM

In Edinburgh once I saw a great band of medical students, playing under the name of The Peristalsis Five.

It is, apparently, the movement of the bowel.

- ian B

Subject: RE: Folk songs appropriate for medical students
From: Susanne (skw)
Date: 28 Jun 02 - 04:26 PM

How about 'Pills' or 'Cholesterol', both by Glaswegian Adam McNaughtan? And 'Cod Liver Oil' (the one without the Orange Juice - the music hall song made popular by The Dubliners)?
I'd love to know which songs Clarke chose and how the students reacted to them!

BTW, the 'Burke and Hare' song Iamarca quoted far above was written by Robin Laing.

Subject: RE: Folk songs appropriate for medical students
From: DonD
Date: 27 Jun 02 - 12:37 PM

Learned men that use the pen
Have writ your praises high
You sweet poteen from Ireland green
That's made from corn and rye.
So away all pills, it'll cure all ills
Be you Christian, Pagan or Jew
Take off your coat, open up your throat
To the dear old mountan dew.

Subject: RE: Folk songs appropriate for medical students
From: Mrrzy
Date: 27 Jun 02 - 11:53 AM

I had Dr. Freud by the Gateway Singers at the Hungry I, but I wouldn't be surprised if the KTrio did it too.

Subject: RE: Folk songs appropriate for medical students
From: Genie
Date: 27 Jun 02 - 10:51 AM

"...and the doctor said, "Give 'em jug band music. It's bound to make 'em feel just fine!"

§;- D

Subject: RE: Folk songs appropriate for medical students
From: GUEST,Fossil at home
Date: 27 Jun 02 - 05:51 AM

Loudon Wainwright III: "I went to the Doctor".

Must be on his website somewhere.

Subject: RE: Folk songs appropriate for medical students
From: JohnInKansas
Date: 26 Jun 02 - 06:20 AM

I recently overheard an unknown member of the audience who seemed to have several verses that were "cute," although I only caught:

To the tune of (Come to me my) Melancholy Baby -

Never give Viagra to a lawyer,
'Cause it only makes them tall...

Anyone recognize it?

John

Subject: RE: Folk songs appropriate for medical students
From: GUEST,David Richoux (KFJC FM)
Date: 26 Jun 02 - 12:17 AM

Hi, I just happened to find this site & forum while researching a favorite song. Earlier in the thread someone mentions "SOME LITTLE BUG IS GOING TO FIND YOU" and the Mudcat database gives this reference to the lyric:

Note: Surprisingly enough, this dates back to the 1890s. Brad Kincaid recorded it in the 30's, Phil Harris recorded it in the 1940s. Sally Rogers recorded it on Love Will Guide Us, Flying Fish. RG

From what I know about this song, it was written in 1915 (maybe it was influenced by the influenza epidemic of that year) Music by: Silvio Hein Lyrics by: Benjamin Hapgood Burt and Roy Atwell for a Franz Lehar Operetta "Alone At Last" and made popular by Roy Atwell. You can see a image of the song sheet at http://www.parlorsongs.com/issues/2000-9/2000-9.asp

BTW, There is a fine recording of this song by Eubie Blake and Ivan Harold Browning that was recorded in 1972.

Standard disclamers apply - this info came off the internet, after all...

Subject: RE: Folk songs appropriate for medical students
From: GUEST,Philippa
Date: 17 May 00 - 02:28 PM

I once had a physics prof who taught us a song to the tune of Men of Harlech, which incorporated some formulas to memorise.
Reviewing anatomy and physiology on-line today, I found a muscle song included in the outline notes at http://www.cs.ndsu.nodak.edu/~revie/notes/bio131/apch10.htm
If you don't want to read all the notes do a search for the word "song" on the page. I expect you may find other songs if you go to the home page and look through the other biology notes at this site.

I was at a waulking song workshop with Anna Martin recently. She showed us how the songs kept the rhythyms for fulling the tweed and I was wondering if I could work up a song sequence to do massage by. There's a challenge for someone, the rhythyms have to flow from effleurage through to hacking and cupping and back to effleurage. ... although I've always said I don't like to hear music while giving or receiving massage, that it's too distracting.

Subject: RE: Folk songs appropriate for medical students
From: Crowhugger
Date: 06 Apr 00 - 08:38 AM

KT, maybe something here...

Subject: RE: Folk songs appropriate for medical students
From: Crowhugger
Date: 18 Feb 00 - 08:00 AM

I always wondered how surgeons were trained.

Subject: RE: Folk songs appropriate for medical students
From: GUEST,Mark Cohen
Date: 17 Feb 00 - 06:30 PM

Thanks, Arkie! I'll have to learn these and do them for my surgeon friends.

Aloha (from Eugene Oregon today)
Mark

Subject: RE: Folk songs appropriate for medical students
From: GUEST,Jim Dixon
Date: 17 Feb 00 - 04:13 PM

After posting the above excerpt of "Doctor Feel-Good" I spent a good deal of time searching the web for the lyrics. I never succeeded, but I was able to find out this much: It was written by Willie Lee "Piano Red" Perryman (1911-85), recorded by him in 1961, and published as a single on the Okeh label (#7144). It became a big hit, so that Perryman subsequently adopted "Doctor Feelgood" as his stage name, and when he brought out an album in 1962, it was called "Doctor Feelgood and the Interns." Fascinating, huh?

Now perhaps someone with more skill or determination than I will continue the search. I'm giving up.