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Divorce Music (songs)

bflat 01 Jul 00 - 11:10 PM
Amergin 01 Jul 00 - 11:14 PM
WyoWoman 02 Jul 00 - 01:16 AM
GUEST,dbugajski@juno.com 02 Jul 00 - 04:34 AM
SeanM 02 Jul 00 - 05:36 AM
gillymor 02 Jul 00 - 08:54 AM
kendall 02 Jul 00 - 09:06 AM
katlaughing 02 Jul 00 - 09:37 AM
Morticia 02 Jul 00 - 11:01 AM
Liz the Squeak 02 Jul 00 - 03:16 PM
Margaret V 02 Jul 00 - 03:24 PM
bflat 02 Jul 00 - 09:21 PM
flattop 02 Jul 00 - 09:38 PM
flattop 02 Jul 00 - 09:39 PM
Mrrzy 02 Jul 00 - 10:20 PM
WyoWoman 02 Jul 00 - 11:54 PM
katlaughing 03 Jul 00 - 12:09 AM
Roger in Baltimore 03 Jul 00 - 12:21 AM
flattop 03 Jul 00 - 12:22 AM
Mark Cohen 03 Jul 00 - 12:45 AM
WyoWoman 03 Jul 00 - 01:13 AM
flattop 03 Jul 00 - 01:51 AM
Mark Clark 03 Jul 00 - 02:21 AM
alison 03 Jul 00 - 05:17 AM
dwditty 03 Jul 00 - 09:54 AM
L R Mole 03 Jul 00 - 10:56 AM
pastorpest 03 Jul 00 - 11:52 AM
Mrrzy 03 Jul 00 - 12:00 PM
Willie-O 03 Jul 00 - 12:40 PM
GUEST 03 Jul 00 - 01:36 PM
GUEST,JMCC 03 Jul 00 - 02:58 PM
bflat 03 Jul 00 - 11:41 PM
katlaughing 03 Jul 00 - 11:50 PM
mg 04 Jul 00 - 12:21 AM
JenEllen 04 Jul 00 - 12:30 AM
Amergin 04 Jul 00 - 01:04 AM
WyoWoman 04 Jul 00 - 01:48 AM
Lucius 04 Jul 00 - 01:58 AM
katlaughing 04 Jul 00 - 06:07 AM
gatyamgal 04 Jul 00 - 06:37 AM
Bagpuss 04 Jul 00 - 07:20 AM
Callie 04 Jul 00 - 09:35 AM
wysiwyg 04 Jul 00 - 12:08 PM
wysiwyg 04 Jul 00 - 12:11 PM
leprechaun 04 Jul 00 - 12:27 PM
sledge 04 Jul 00 - 12:32 PM
GUEST,O'Carroll of the Midwest 04 Jul 00 - 01:01 PM
wysiwyg 04 Jul 00 - 01:22 PM
GUEST,JMCC 04 Jul 00 - 08:05 PM
WyoWoman 04 Jul 00 - 11:13 PM
Jim Krause 05 Jul 00 - 02:51 PM
katlaughing 05 Jul 00 - 03:24 PM
Hollowfox 05 Jul 00 - 03:36 PM
GUEST 05 Jul 00 - 04:04 PM
GUEST,mountain man 05 Jul 00 - 04:05 PM
GUEST,LDB 05 Jul 00 - 09:48 PM
bob jr 06 Jul 00 - 01:16 AM
Callie 06 Jul 00 - 01:24 AM
Rob the Ranter 06 Jul 00 - 01:39 AM
WyoWoman 06 Jul 00 - 01:44 AM
WyoWoman 06 Jul 00 - 01:44 AM
Rob the Ranter 06 Jul 00 - 02:16 AM
katlaughing 06 Jul 00 - 07:07 AM
bflat 06 Jul 00 - 08:13 AM
GUEST,Ron Olesko 06 Jul 00 - 10:53 AM
wysiwyg 06 Jul 00 - 02:48 PM
Fiddlin' Big Al 06 Jul 00 - 03:23 PM
Bill Hahn//\\ 06 Jul 00 - 06:39 PM
WyoWoman 06 Jul 00 - 09:59 PM
Callie 07 Jul 00 - 12:46 AM
WyoWoman 07 Jul 00 - 01:14 AM
Albatross 07 Jul 00 - 03:26 AM
Callie 08 Jul 00 - 12:07 AM
dwditty 08 Jul 00 - 06:51 AM
bigchuck 08 Jul 00 - 08:40 AM
dwditty 08 Jul 00 - 06:52 PM
GUEST,Tale 08 Jul 00 - 08:42 PM
bflat 08 Jul 00 - 08:56 PM
Margaret V 08 Jul 00 - 10:33 PM
WyoWoman 08 Jul 00 - 11:34 PM
katlaughing 08 Jul 00 - 11:45 PM
bob jr 09 Jul 00 - 12:32 AM
WyoWoman 09 Jul 00 - 01:18 AM
Callie 09 Jul 00 - 06:29 AM
Margaret V 09 Jul 00 - 09:16 AM
katlaughing 09 Jul 00 - 09:39 AM
Callie 09 Jul 00 - 09:45 AM
Margaret V 09 Jul 00 - 12:22 PM
oggie 09 Jul 00 - 03:38 PM
WyoWoman 09 Jul 00 - 03:38 PM
bflat 09 Jul 00 - 05:23 PM
Margaret V 09 Jul 00 - 08:22 PM
Callie 09 Jul 00 - 10:15 PM
Hollowfox 10 Jul 00 - 04:39 PM
WyoWoman 11 Jul 00 - 12:54 AM
Callie 11 Jul 00 - 02:31 AM
katlaughing 11 Jul 00 - 04:35 AM
bflat 17 Aug 00 - 05:09 PM
Callie 17 Aug 00 - 07:48 PM
Matt Woodbury/Mimosa 17 Aug 00 - 08:35 PM
richlmo 17 Aug 00 - 10:26 PM
Shanti 18 Aug 00 - 12:33 PM
Bert 18 Aug 00 - 01:03 PM
Mbo 18 Aug 00 - 01:07 PM
katlaughing 18 Aug 00 - 01:15 PM
GUEST,Hope 18 Aug 00 - 04:52 PM
bflat 18 Aug 00 - 07:16 PM
Lox 19 Aug 00 - 12:38 AM
GUEST 26 Aug 00 - 07:08 PM
Jim Dixon 25 Jan 01 - 08:22 PM
Noreen 26 Jan 01 - 12:35 PM
mousethief 26 Jan 01 - 01:34 PM
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Subject: Divorce Music
From: bflat
Date: 01 Jul 00 - 11:10 PM

Sometimes it becomes necessary for a person to stand alone after many years of marriage and say I must become my own person. It is not because the spouse is without redeeming qualities but it is the only option left to the other person if he is to remain an intact person. And music can help especially if it has been an integral part of one partners' life. Can you help with some song titles that may be soothing during this transition? I would appreciate the musical sustenance.

[Many song titles in this thread have been converted to links by a Mudelf.]


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Subject: RE: BS: Divorce Music
From: Amergin
Date: 01 Jul 00 - 11:14 PM

HARRY'S WIFE by Eric Bogle. Don't have lyrics to it though. I have a friend who's leaving her husband and when I played that song on the stereo her face lit up... so I guess there's something to it....

Amergin


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Subject: RE: BS: Divorce Music
From: WyoWoman
Date: 02 Jul 00 - 01:16 AM

"ARE YOU TIRED OF ME, [MY] DARLING?"

or maybe "HIT THE ROAD, JACK," depending, of course on whether you've reached the anger part of the grieving process...

I know it's not folk, but Tom Waits' earlier stuff is pretty darned good for -- not necessarily soothing your emotions, but reflecting them when you're in that poignant, deep-blue, gritty funk that accompanies such emotional upheaval.

I also favor taking long drives with Schubert's Mass #2 in G major blasting away. Sort of helps put it all in perspective ...

I'll be interested to see what posts get added. This is sort of a hole in my folk cloak ...

WW


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Subject: RE: BS: Divorce Music
From: GUEST,dbugajski@juno.com
Date: 02 Jul 00 - 04:34 AM

My current favorite is on my way (or maybe it's called I'M NOT RUNNING ANYMORE) by John Mellencamp


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Subject: RE: BS: Divorce Music
From: SeanM
Date: 02 Jul 00 - 05:36 AM

"SAD SONGS AND WALTZES"... I believe it's Willie Nelson, though I'm incredibly willing to be corrected.

M


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Subject: RE: BS: Divorce Music
From: gillymor
Date: 02 Jul 00 - 08:54 AM

Emmylou Harris did a beautiful and sad song called "IN MY DREAMS" that helped me through the breakup of my marriage, although I find it a tad self-pitying. Richard Thompson did a great country song called "KEEP YOUR DISTANCE" that sounded like he was writing my life.

Chin Up, Frankie


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Subject: RE: BS: Divorce Music
From: kendall
Date: 02 Jul 00 - 09:06 AM

"I GOT SICK OF YOU SOME TIME AGO"


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Subject: RE: BS: Divorce Music
From: katlaughing
Date: 02 Jul 00 - 09:37 AM

There is that one by Eric Clapton on his "Backless" album, sorry I don't have it to hand, that has a great tune and words some of which are, "I don't care."..something, something, then "'cause I don't love you and you don't love me." [=PROMISES]

I'll look up the title today and post it. Have you heard Mudcatter Paul G.'s song, "SAILS AGAINST THE WIND?" I think it would be a pretty nice one for this kind of situation. Let me know if you'd like to hear it and I can send you a midi or you could come into HearMe sometime and I could sing it for you.

kat


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Subject: RE: BS: Divorce Music
From: Morticia
Date: 02 Jul 00 - 11:01 AM

SOLO by Sandy Denny has always been a comfort to me


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Subject: RE: BS: Divorce Music
From: Liz the Squeak
Date: 02 Jul 00 - 03:16 PM

The perennial 'HERE'S A QUARTER (CALL SOMEONE WHO CARES)' - or the Corrs 'I NEVER LOVED YOU ANYWAY'. Both great for those more ... acerbic separations.

For the softer side, there's...

No, sorry, I don't have a softer side...

LTS


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Subject: RE: BS: Divorce Music
From: Margaret V
Date: 02 Jul 00 - 03:24 PM

How about Merle Haggard's "I CAN'T BE MYSELF"? Certainly one of the most beautiful songs that captures the sentiment (though not the intent to separate) is Lucinda Williams' "SIDE OF THE ROAD." Heal well, bflat. Margaret


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Subject: RE: BS: Divorce Music
From: bflat
Date: 02 Jul 00 - 09:21 PM

With a grateful heart, Thank You.


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Subject: Lyr Add: BETTER OFF WITHOUT A WIFE (Tom Waits)
From: flattop
Date: 02 Jul 00 - 09:38 PM

This may have been one of the songs that WyoWoman had in mind.

BETTER OFF WITHOUT A WIFE
by Tom Waits

all my friends are married
every Tom and Dick and Harry
you must be strong to go it alone
here's to the bachelors and the bowery bums
and those who feel that they're the ones
who are better off without a wife

I like to sleep until the crack of noon
midnight howlin' at the moon
goin' out when I wanto, comin' home when I please
I don't have to ask permission
if I want to go out fishing
and I never have to ask for the keys

never been no Valentino
had a girl who lived in Reno
left me for a trumpet player didn't get me down
he was wanted for assault
though he said it weren't his fault
well the coppers rode him right out of town

sleeping until the crack of noon
midnight howlin' at the moon
goin' out when I wanto, comin' home when I please
don't have to ask permission
if I want to go out fishing
and I never have to ask for the keys

selfish about my privacy
as long as I can be with me
we get along so well I can't believe
I love to chew the fat with folks
and listen to all your dirty jokes
I'm so thankful for these friends I do receive

This song had a great talking intro on the album about dating himself, taking himself up to his room, showing himself some dirty magazines and taking advantage of himself but not being weird about it.


--- Line breaks <br> added (I hope correctly)---
-- PA --


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Subject: RE: BS: Divorce Music
From: flattop
Date: 02 Jul 00 - 09:39 PM

Well the formatting didn't work.


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Subject: RE: BS: Divorce Music
From: Mrrzy
Date: 02 Jul 00 - 10:20 PM

Bflat, check out the Bummed Out And Singing Anyway thread, it's one I started in a similar spot and it has all kinds of great music on it... and best of luck and soft shoes for your hard road,

-Mrr


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Subject: RE: BS: Divorce Music
From: WyoWoman
Date: 02 Jul 00 - 11:54 PM

Flattop -- yes, yes. I remember that monologue.That's a great one.

the song that always makes me cry is "MARTHA," [by Tim Buckley] with the lyrics, "Those were days of roses, of poetry and prose and, Martha, all I had was you and all you had was me ..."

And it ALWAYS, every time without fail, brings to mind this image of the odd little apartment where my kids' dad was living when we met in college and that first passion-drenched summer we spent so in love and lust with each other we could barely come up for air.

Isn't it simply amazing how relationships can start out with so much

ooompfh

and end up just going
fzzzzztttt?

But at least for a while, it was sweet, and it does provide me with lovely, poignant memories...

ww


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Subject: RE: BS: Divorce Music
From: katlaughing
Date: 03 Jul 00 - 12:09 AM

Ah....that is poignant, WW...

How about Greg Brown's "JUST BY MYSELF" and "I DON'T WANT TO HAVE A NICE DAY?"


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Subject: RE: BS: Divorce Music
From: Roger in Baltimore
Date: 03 Jul 00 - 12:21 AM

I think it's Lynn Morris who wrote a song whose idea is "everybody hates country music, that is until they go through a divorce." I'll go look it up on Cowpie.

Big RiB


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Subject: RE: BS: Divorce Music
From: flattop
Date: 03 Jul 00 - 12:22 AM

I don't remember your Martha song, WyoWoman. Was it on the same album? I bought two Waits albums looking for a song that Margie Gilles danced to. I didn't find the song and didn't like either album a lot so I gave them away. Sounds like you got more out of his songs than I did. Strange. I thought he was funny at times. I don't think any of his songs reminded me of your kid's dad or that first summer you had together. Your message touched me though.


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Subject: RE: BS: Divorce Music
From: Mark Cohen
Date: 03 Jul 00 - 12:45 AM

bflat, this may not be true for anybody but me, but I've found myself singing love songs a lot. I think the reason is that I lived through eight years of a marriage in which my wife told me all our problems were my fault, and I had just little enough self-esteem to think she was right. After about a year of painful simmering crisis, during which I tried as hard as I could to make things work, she finally took the kids to the Mainland for a family emergency and then called to tell me she wasn't coming back. That was last November, and a month later I filed for divorce, which pissed her off no end. But what I discovered was that I AM the good and strong person that I always wished I was but thought I couldn't be. So songs about real love (not flash-in-the-pan projected lust) and real people now ring true for me. Like Stan Rogers' "LIES" and "FORTY-FIVE YEARS", Gordon Bok's "A TUNE FOR NOVEMBER", Bill Staines' "THE ROSEVILLE FAIR", etc. Even though I'm living by myself now, I have friends and music, and a beautiful daughter (who I hope I'll be seeing more often soon) and I know that I have the ability to love if the opportunity arises. Good luck, my friend, and keep on singing.

Aloha,
Mark


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Subject: RE: BS: Divorce Music
From: WyoWoman
Date: 03 Jul 00 - 01:13 AM

Yeah. The scraping-yourself-up-off-the-pavement part of the program is the hardest part. It does get better, with the passage of time and lots of long, hot baths (is this a chick thing?). And even if it's a fairly amicable divorce and you mutually agree it's the best thing, it still is deeply ouchy for a good, long while... Although I sort of think "amicable divorce" is more hope than reality...

Flattop -- I think it was on a compilation CD I have. I agree that some of his work doesn't strike any particularly poignant chords in me (Rain Dogs, for instance) but some, like "(LOOKING FOR) THE HEART OF SATURDAY NIGHT," are just splendid...

And as for them not reminding you of that hot, sultry Oklahoma summer -- well, alls I got to say is, ya shoulda been there...

ww


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Subject: RE: BS: Divorce Music
From: flattop
Date: 03 Jul 00 - 01:51 AM

Sorry I missed it.


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Subject: RE: BS: Divorce Music
From: Mark Clark
Date: 03 Jul 00 - 02:21 AM

bflat, there's only one thing to do. Check yourself into the nearest saloon with a three-piece country band that takes requests. Stick with Maker's Mark, either straight up or on the rocks. Ask for "FOR THE GOOD TIMES," "D-I-V-O-R-C-E," then maybe "THE STREETS OF BALTIMORE," "THE RACE IS ON," and "GOLDEN RING." After those, see if they know any sad songs.

Stick with it, you'll come out just fine.

- Mark


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Subject: RE: BS: Divorce Music
From: alison
Date: 03 Jul 00 - 05:17 AM

Loudon Wainwright III's

"I'D RATHER BE LONELY"

slainte

alison


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Subject: RE: BS: Divorce Music
From: dwditty
Date: 03 Jul 00 - 09:54 AM

If you want a good cry, try Fred Koller's "LIFE AS WE KNEW IT (ENDED TODAY)"

dw


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Subject: RE: BS: Divorce Music
From: L R Mole
Date: 03 Jul 00 - 10:56 AM

Peter Allen: "I'D RATHER LEAVE WHILE I'M IN LOVE". If I were a piano guy and not guitar, I'd do more of his stuff. Or, as he'd say from the ivories, half-sympathy, half-kidding: "Ballad crowd, huh?"


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Subject: RE: BS: Divorce Music
From: pastorpest
Date: 03 Jul 00 - 11:52 AM

Leonard Cohen's "SO LONG, MARIANNE" and "(When You and I Were Young) MAGGIE" as sung by Jean Redpath (the couple do not stay together). Best wishes bflat! May you find abundant life in new ways. I have thought for a long time there need to be significant rituals to help people through divorce. Every other big change in a relationship has its rituals: birth, marriage, death.


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Subject: RE: BS: Divorce Music
From: Mrrzy
Date: 03 Jul 00 - 12:00 PM

Ooh, I just LOVE Leonard Cohen when life sucks! Forgot all about him. But what if bflat doesn't want to wallow but kind of ride the storm? I will survive?? Anything else on that tone?


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Subject: RE: BS: Divorce Music
From: Willie-O
Date: 03 Jul 00 - 12:40 PM

When I feel like my long-term partnership is not in the best of health, I find myself pretty much involuntarily singing stuff like "SUMMER WAGES ", "ALCOHOL IN THE BLOODSTREAM" (another Ian Tyson song), "SHIVER ME TIMBERS," "BACHELOR'S HALL" (thanks again Rick) and rather sneakily the piano riff from "BETTER OFF WITHOUT A WIFE".

It's kind of devious--gives some emotional release without having to actually get all first-person and direct about it. I can always say, "oh, I just _like_ that song."

Bflat, I appreciate your words in the opening post. There are surely better times ahead.

W-O


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Subject: RE: BS: Divorce Music
From: GUEST
Date: 03 Jul 00 - 01:36 PM

"LIQUOR, BEER, AND WINE" by the Reverend Horton Heat. It's got a good, honkey-tonk bounce to it, and although it's about a guy drowning his sorrows, it's also funny. And if you order now, you'll also receive this bonus, at no extra cost: It's easy to play along with...typical I-IV-V7 in the key of C, I think...C-F-G7. lyrics

http://www.reverendhortonheat.com/new_start.html


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Subject: RE: BS: Divorce Music
From: GUEST,JMCC
Date: 03 Jul 00 - 02:58 PM

Nothing can beat "ONE CLEAR MOMENT" by Linda Thompson. Album released on WB after she and Richard split. Don't think it's out on CD, but believe me, it's worth tracking down. RT's answer "THE HAND OF KINDNESS" is available from Joe Boyd's label.
love, John.


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Subject: RE: BS: Divorce Music
From: bflat
Date: 03 Jul 00 - 11:41 PM

I'm compiling a list of the song title suggestions you have made. I'd like to create a tape for myself from an original recording, with as many of the songs found herein. No CD burning equipment around here. But I can tape from my CD player, so tape is best, greater portability. I never would have thought to includ many of songs found above, if it were not for the depth of all of you. Sincere thanks for your effort and especially your good wishes. This is a neat place to bare one's soul. Lots of support.


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Subject: RE: BS: Divorce Music
From: katlaughing
Date: 03 Jul 00 - 11:50 PM

bflat, if you have any problems finding any of them, let us know. I could send you midis of the ones I mentioned or a tape, except for the Eric Clapton one I mentioned. The LP is buried behind some boxes at the moment. Can anyone remember the name of it? It's got a realy pretty melody.

Hang in there and know we're all thinking of you....seems you have some pretty good insight...may it serve you well through such a major life change, been through it twice myself.

kat


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Subject: RE: BS: Divorce Music
From: mg
Date: 04 Jul 00 - 12:21 AM

it's one thing to leave a partner you have gotten out of love with, or even grown to despise. it is another matter entirely to deprive the children of a parent by moving them far away or playing the tricks that people play so well. That is child abuse in my book, unless there is danger to the child. mg


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Subject: RE: BS: Divorce Music
From: JenEllen
Date: 04 Jul 00 - 12:30 AM

Big hug bflat, you're among friends. There was a time that I couldn't even listen to Mary Chapin-Carpenter's 'JUST BECAUSE' without bawling. Ended up taking the dog for LOTS of runs. How about songs like
"I Don't Feel Like Crying Today"
old 80's metal like "DON'T GO AWAY MAD (JUST GO AWAY)"
Those always seem to help...~Elle


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Subject: RE: BS: Divorce Music
From: Amergin
Date: 04 Jul 00 - 01:04 AM

Roy Clark's THANK GOD AND GREYHOUND (You're Gone)


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Subject: RE: BS: Divorce Music
From: WyoWoman
Date: 04 Jul 00 - 01:48 AM

Ben Folds Five "I Want My Money Back ..." [=SONG FOR THE DUMPED]


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Subject: RE: BS: Divorce Music
From: Lucius
Date: 04 Jul 00 - 01:58 AM

I've been in this neighboorhood. I usually end up humming "THE LAST TIME I SAW RICHARD "(Joni). Once my pain was gone, I could be amused by "HOW CAN I MISS YOU WHEN YOU WON'T GO AWAY" (Dan Hicks).

Lucius


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Subject: RE: BS: Divorce Music
From: katlaughing
Date: 04 Jul 00 - 06:07 AM

bflat, take a gander at the words Bugsy posted of a song he did in HearMe, written by his friend Derek Brimstone, which is the title of the thread. Bugsy did a fine job of singing it and the words seem to be relevant, imo.


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Subject: RE: BS: Divorce Music
From: gatyamgal
Date: 04 Jul 00 - 06:37 AM

Back when I got my divorce in 1988 there were several country songs that brought me comfort. Some titles I remember are Letters Home, Radio Heart, That's that, Life As We Knew It, Johnny Doesn't Love Here Anymore. But my favorite one was Everytime You Go Outside I Hope It Rains.


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Subject: RE: BS: Divorce Music
From: Bagpuss
Date: 04 Jul 00 - 07:20 AM

Its got to be D-I-V-O-R-C-E, the Billy Connolly version. If nothing else, I'm sure it will make you laugh.

I was going to mention I Want My Money Back [=SONG FOR THE DUMPED] by Ben Folds Five, but someone beat me to it.

Bagpuss


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Subject: RE: BS: Divorce Music
From: Callie
Date: 04 Jul 00 - 09:35 AM

Can't think of any uplifting ones, but there are plenty of sad ones about separation. My favourite ones are Elvis Costello's "Almost Blue" and "This House is Empty Now", and his cover of "A GOOD YEAR FOR THE ROSES". Then there's Charles Mingus' "Weird Nightmare", Richard Thompson's "WITHERED AND DIED", even the Bread song "Diary". And what about Burt Bacharach's "I'll Never Fall In Love Again".

"Martha" is on Tom Waits' "Closing Time" record.

Here is a great poem by Brian Patten, who even at his cheeriest knows that there's bound to be (half) a worm in even the sweetest apple!

THE AMBUSH When the face you swore never to forget
Can no longer be remembered,
When a list of regrets is torn up and thrown away
Then the hurt fades,
And you think you've grown strong.
You sit in bars and boast to yourself
'Never again will I be vulnerable.
It was an aberration to be so open,
A folly, never to be repeated.'
How absurd and fragile such promises.
Hidden from you, crouched
Among the longings you have suppressed
And the desires you imagine tamed,
A sweet pain waits in ambush.
And there will come a day when in a field
Heaven's mouth gapes open,
And on a web the shadow
Of a marigold will smoulder.
Then without warning,
Without a shred of comfort,
Emotions you thought had been put aside
Will flare up within you and bleed you of reason.
The routines which comforted you,
And the habits in which you sought refuge
Will bend like sunlight under water,
And go astray.
Your body will become a banquet,
Falling heavenwards.
You will loll in spring's sweet avalanche
Without the burden of memory,
And once again
Monstrous love will swallow you.

Heal well bflat.

Callie


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Subject: RE: BS: Divorce Music
From: wysiwyg
Date: 04 Jul 00 - 12:08 PM

Well, there is a blues tune coming to mind but I can't track it down. The essence of the song is a recounting of some of the bad things the "missed" partner has done, and a wish for their return-- but then each verse ends-- "On second thought, baby, I think I'd rather have the blues!"

For uplifting, Clint Black's "A BETTER MAN" "I'm leaving here a better man...."

~S~


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Subject: RE: BS: Divorce Music
From: wysiwyg
Date: 04 Jul 00 - 12:11 PM

... conveniently posted at COWPIE:

Click here

~s~


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Subject: RE: BS: Divorce Music
From: leprechaun
Date: 04 Jul 00 - 12:27 PM

Barry Manilow - any song - great incentive to heal.


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Subject: RE: BS: Divorce Music
From: sledge
Date: 04 Jul 00 - 12:32 PM

When needing wallow in self pity (as I have done myself a few years ago) try REM, every body hurts or Pearl jam's delight fully dark "Black".

Take heart anyway, it does get better.


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Subject: RE: BS: Divorce Music
From: GUEST,O'Carroll of the Midwest
Date: 04 Jul 00 - 01:01 PM

Just remember that everything you've done in the past has brought you to this point in your life and that from now on you can chart your course and aim for happiness.

Try Cat Stevens "On the Road to Find Out". From this point on you can search for joy, fun, and follow the music to be your own destiny.

( I've heard the rumor that if you play the vinyl record backward, you can hear the words "kill Rushdie", but I think that's only rumor)

If that doesn't work, try Dervish's "I Buried My Wife and Danced on Top of Her", adjusted for gender, of course.


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Subject: RE: BS: Divorce Music
From: wysiwyg
Date: 04 Jul 00 - 01:22 PM

also see www.rc.org

~S~


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Subject: RE: BS: Divorce Music
From: GUEST,JMCC
Date: 04 Jul 00 - 08:05 PM

Forget wallowing,as Sledge proposes. Me, I go for vitriol. Some tracks from Linda Thompson's "One Clear Moment" appear on "Dreams Fly Away" (well, that title is a dead give away). "Talking like a Man", "Many Dreams Must Fly Away", Telling Me Lies" and One Clear Moment". Hannabal HNCD 1379. (? Rykodisc in USA).
Personally I wrote "Do you lie awake at night, thinking of new ways to hurt me?". Vitriol on a stick.
love, john.


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Subject: RE: BS: Divorce Music
From: WyoWoman
Date: 04 Jul 00 - 11:13 PM

Callie -- nice poem. I'm printing it out and putting it on my bulletin board...And thanks for the info on "Martha."

Ya see, bflat? "There are sorrows to be healed, and mercies, mercies in this world..."

WW


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Subject: RE: BS: Divorce Music
From: Jim Krause
Date: 05 Jul 00 - 02:51 PM

WyoWoman, I think that it is pretty special that you are blessed with pleasant memories. I go back to the old places where I met my first wife and it makes my heart pretty heavy, even after twenty-five years. In fact, for a long, long time, I couldn't even mention her name without my stomach turning over. And only recently, in the last oh, five years, or so have I been able to work out some of these feelings in songs that I feel I can reasonably sing in public. Time heals all wounds? Maybe not. At least not completely. Someday I'm gonna put all those well written hurtin' tunes on CD. Someday. Along with a few I've written for the Light of My Life.


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Subject: RE: BS: Divorce Music
From: katlaughing
Date: 05 Jul 00 - 03:24 PM

Soddy, that will be good medicine, please let us know when you do!

Callie, that poem is just incredibly beautiful. Thank you for posting it.

Bflat, if you go listen to the Mudcat Radio SHow of June 21st, when Bill and Allan were there, at about 03:20:00 on the RealPlayer counter, you can hear Bert sing one of his originals which is relevant and very poignant, "There's Never A Good Time for Leaving."

Glad you found those two in the other thread.

kat


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Subject: RE: BS: Divorce Music
From: Hollowfox
Date: 05 Jul 00 - 03:36 PM

I've found that the singing of Edith Piaf helped a lot when my husband left. I don't speak French, but her spirit shines through. she was quite a survivor.


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Subject: RE: BS: Divorce Music
From: GUEST
Date: 05 Jul 00 - 04:04 PM


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Subject: RE: BS: Divorce Music
From: GUEST,mountain man
Date: 05 Jul 00 - 04:05 PM

There must be 50 ways to leave your lover, Simon (without Garfunkle).


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Subject: RE: BS: Divorce Music
From: GUEST,LDB
Date: 05 Jul 00 - 09:48 PM

It may have been written as a political song, but I'll nominate "HAPPY DAYS ARE HERE AGAIN."


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Subject: RE: BS: Divorce Music
From: bob jr
Date: 06 Jul 00 - 01:16 AM

how about some of the following "It's Over" Roy Orbison "Don't Renege on Our Love" by Richard and Linda Thompson "SHE THINKS I STILL CARE" by George Jones "I Just Don't Know What to Do With Myself" either Dusty Springfield or Elvis Costello version "Hot Burrito #1" by the Flying Burrito Brothers "She's Gone" by Bob Marley "HE STOPPED LOVING HER TODAY" by Merle Haggard "You're a Big Girl Now" by Dylan "BIG RIVER " by Johnny Cash "OH, LONESOME ME " by Don Gibson "Tracks of My Tears" Smokey Robinson and the Miracles and man now I am getting depressed so I am gonna stop oh one more "The Walking" by Jane Siberry that one does it to me every damn time....


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Subject: RE: BS: Divorce Music
From: Callie
Date: 06 Jul 00 - 01:24 AM

Other good wallowing music: ANYTHING by Tom Waits, Ron Sexsmith (what a name, eh?!), Leonard Cohen, Chet Baker.


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Subject: RE: BS: Divorce Music
From: Rob the Ranter
Date: 06 Jul 00 - 01:39 AM

Billy Connoly D.I.V.O.R.C.E. is very funny. I unfortunatly do not have the words at the moment.
Rob


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Subject: RE: BS: Divorce Music
From: WyoWoman
Date: 06 Jul 00 - 01:44 AM

Bob jr -- Have you heard Jane Siberry's duet with k.d. lang on the "Until the End of the World" soundtrack? One of my favorite songs, ever.

And soddy -- Time didn't heal my wounds, I did. I worked really hard at it, at forgiving and creating a different life for myself, and at freeing myself from the need to blame and especially from the need to win and to be right. I think healing and forgiving are a discipline, just like yoga or meditation. Time, left to its own devices, can just make wounds fester or burrow underground. It takes an act of will to heal and move on -- at least that's my experience.

WW


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Subject: RE: BS: Divorce Music
From: WyoWoman
Date: 06 Jul 00 - 01:44 AM

Oh, whoops. The name of the aforementioned duet is "Calling All Angels."

ww


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Subject: Lyr Add: D.I.V.O.R.C.E (parody by Billy Connolly)
From: Rob the Ranter
Date: 06 Jul 00 - 02:16 AM

D.I.V.O.R.C.E.
(from the LP "Classic Connolly in Words and Music")

Our little dog is six years old, and he's smart as any damn kid.
But when you mention the V.E.T. he damn near flips his lid.
Words like S.H.O.T. shot or W.O.R.M. worm,
These are words which make him S.Q.U.I.R.M. squirm.

His Q.U.A.R.A.N.T.I.N.E quarantine starts today,
Because he bit the V.E.T. and then he ran away.
He caused me and my wife to have a big fight, and then both of them bit me.
And that's why I'm gonna get a D.I.V.O.R.C.E.

She shouted "get him, Rover," and he jumped over, and bit my L.E.G.
She sank her teeth in my B.U.M. and called me an effin B
Well I'm telling you, that was my cue to get O.F.F.-ski
And I'm going down to the town tonight to get a new B.I.R.D.

His Q.U.A.R.A.N.T.I.N.E quarantine starts today,
Both my wife and my wee scabby dog will soon be hauled away.
That's why I spell out all these words so as my dog can't hear,
Oh I must admit that dog is acting Q.U.E.E.R. queer.
Oh, I must admit that dog is acting Q.U.E.E.R. queer.

(Published by EMI Music Publishing Ltd.)


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Subject: RE: BS: Divorce Music
From: katlaughing
Date: 06 Jul 00 - 07:07 AM

Thanks for posting those words, RtheR, I love Billy's stuff but had not heard that one! Hilarious and my dog understood every word!**BG**

Kind of gender-specific, but one I liked a loooonnng time ago was *gasp* "THESE BOOTS ARE MADE FOR WALKIN'"...Nancy Sinatra! "Are ya ready boots? Start walking!"

kat


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Subject: RE: BS: Divorce Music
From: bflat
Date: 06 Jul 00 - 08:13 AM

WyoWoman, Very true. Heal yourself. But it takes time. Alone time is only a measurement. Thanks for your cogent thoughts.


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Subject: RE: BS: Divorce Music
From: GUEST,Ron Olesko
Date: 06 Jul 00 - 10:53 AM

Paul Clayton recorded a brilliant album called "Unholy Matrimony". The album is filled with songs that question the reasons for marriage.

Also, Loudon Wainwright III has dozens of great songs on the topic. Check out the BBC Sessions CD!


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Subject: RE: BS: Divorce Music
From: wysiwyg
Date: 06 Jul 00 - 02:48 PM

kat,

duh duh duh DAH!
duh duh duh DAH!
duh duh duh DAH!
duh duh duh DAH!

~S~


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Subject: RE: BS: Divorce Music
From: Fiddlin' Big Al
Date: 06 Jul 00 - 03:23 PM

Al Dexter & His Troopers "DIVORCE ME C.O.D.", from the 1940s will give you an upbeat attitude.


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Subject: RE: BS: Divorce Music
From: Bill Hahn//\\
Date: 06 Jul 00 - 06:39 PM

Unless I overlooked it in all the postings no one has mentioned John Prine and his--"(I GUESS I WISH YOU) ALL THE BEST". He hopes she finds someone just like herself.

A tear has now welled up in my left eyeball.

Bill H


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Subject: RE: BS: Divorce Music
From: WyoWoman
Date: 06 Jul 00 - 09:59 PM

Thanks, bflat.

Yes, Bill H. THAT's a great curse/wish...I actually laid it on my most recent ex. (Hadn't bothered to remove the hex yet, but I understand he's just gotten married.)

But, from the 'Be careful what you wish for' department, if I should end up with someone just like ME ... Lordy. It'd be a nuclear meltdown ...

Scary thought.

ww


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Subject: RE: BS: Divorce Music
From: Callie
Date: 07 Jul 00 - 12:46 AM

WyoW: that's one of my favourite songs! (Calling All Angels)


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Subject: RE: BS: Divorce Music
From: WyoWoman
Date: 07 Jul 00 - 01:14 AM

Do you happen to have the chords? I"ve written the words out but haven't sat down to figure out the chords yet...

ww


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Subject: RE: BS: Divorce Music
From: Albatross
Date: 07 Jul 00 - 03:26 AM

Bflat you could try: "As I moved out one bright may morning....."

but seriously you'll get over the divorce if you don't fight it and one day maybe you'll be friends again. Being single is not so bad. There's a big world out there and you're back on the market! Look on it as like being a student again. Foot loose and fancy free. best wishes, Albatross (Trying to keep flying high)


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Subject: RE: BS: Divorce Music
From: Callie
Date: 08 Jul 00 - 12:07 AM

Wyo: If you post the words, I'll work out the chords for you. Not too tricky.

Callie (with guitar in hand)


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Subject: Lyr Add: MY WIFE LEFT TOWN WITH A BANANA
From: dwditty
Date: 08 Jul 00 - 06:51 AM

I do a song called "My Wife Left Town With a Banana" which may not actually fit a thread on divorce music, but it will bring a smile. I have no idea where I learned this from, but wherever it was, I give them credit here.

MY WIFE LEFT TOWN WITH A BANANA

My wife left town with a banana
Life's a rotten deal
I found that yellow sucker hiding in her purse
He's cold and hard but he's got appeal
I hope it never happens to you
Some fruit breaks your marriage in two
My wife left town with a banana
She slipped away

My wife left town with a banana
Now I'm a jealous man
She found a six-inch Latin lover
Now she does the tango with her right hand
Right now I could just die
He's eating my banana creme pie
Oh, my wife left town with a banana
She slipped away


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Subject: RE: BS: Divorce Music
From: bigchuck
Date: 08 Jul 00 - 08:40 AM

One of my favorite "wrote my life songs" is Chris Wall's "I FEEL LIKE HANK WILLIAMS TONIGHT", (Jerry Jeff Walker's Live at Gruen Hall has a great version.


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Subject: RE: BS: Divorce Music
From: dwditty
Date: 08 Jul 00 - 06:52 PM

refresh


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Subject: RE: BS: Divorce Music
From: GUEST,Tale
Date: 08 Jul 00 - 08:42 PM

Neil Young has written (and performed) a song called "THE GREAT DIVIDE", which (even after many years since my parents divorced) really struck me.


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Subject: RE: BS: Divorce Music
From: bflat
Date: 08 Jul 00 - 08:56 PM

There has been such an incredible amount of songs listed and lots of great thoughts that I am amazed and feel a lot of support. So thanks in a big way.

I need your help identifying a song which I believe to be Greg Brown's. There is this refrain: I'm so happy happy happy. It's germane to this thread as I recall. Can someone give me a title and possibly release info?

bflat


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Subject: RE: BS: Divorce Music
From: Margaret V
Date: 08 Jul 00 - 10:33 PM

I think you're looking for "JUST BY MYSELF" which is on "Dream Cafe." You can check the lyrics at www.wing.net/gbrown/ Best wishes. Margaret


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Subject: Lyr Add: CALLING ALL ANGELS (Jean Siberry)
From: WyoWoman
Date: 08 Jul 00 - 11:34 PM

Callie,

Here's my best stab at it, from listening to the CD. (For those who haven't been following along above, Jean Siberry and k.d.lang sing it on "Love You 'til the End of the World," soundtrack to the Wem Winders film of the same name...)

It's not folk, so I don't know if I should post it ... and I don't have anything here with the name of the composer on it, but if you can supply that (I have no idea where my CD case went ...) that would be great and we could give credit where it's due for what is arguably one of the loveliest songs you'll hear.
I want this one done at my funeral -- which of course will be another 50 or 60 years down the road. But I like to be prepared ...

ww
Calling All Angels

A man is placed upon the stairs
A baby cries and high above
You can hear the church bells start to ring.
And the heaviness, the heaviness of it settles in. (Somewhere you can hear a voice sing...)

Then it's one foot, then the other
as you step out on the road, ah,
step out on the road.
And it's how long and how far and how many times
Oh, before it's too late?

Calling all angels, calling all angels,
Walk me through this world, don't leave me alone
Calling all angels, calling all angels,
We're trying, we're hoping,
but we're not sure how this goes.

Ah, every day you gaze upon
the sunset with such dark intensity.
Why, it's almost as if, if you could only crack the code
you'd finally understand
what this all means

Ah, but if you could, do you think you would
trade it all, all the pain and suffering?
Ah, but then you would have missed
the beauty of the light upon this earth
and the sweetness of the evening.

Calling all angels, calling all angels
Walk me through this world, don't leave me alone
Calling all angels, calling all angels
We're trying, we're hoping,
but we're not sure how this goes.

Repeat: Calling all angels, calling all angels
Walk me through this world, don't leave me alone
Calling all angels, calling all angels
We're trying, we're hoping,
We're hurting, we're loving, we're crying, we're calling
'cause we're not sure how this goes...


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Subject: RE: BS: Divorce Music
From: katlaughing
Date: 08 Jul 00 - 11:45 PM

bflat, that's one of the Greg Brown ones I mentioned, which Margaret V, named "JUST BY MYSELF". I have it on his CD, "The Live One", released 1995 by Red House Records. If you'd like me to send you a sound file of it, please just let me know. I love how upbeat it is and the way he laughs about maybe not even folding the laundry, just wadding it up in a drawer and several other *rebellious* things!

kat


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Subject: RE: BS: Divorce Music
From: bob jr
Date: 09 Jul 00 - 12:32 AM

I got another one: "AIN'T THAT LONELY YET" by Dwight Yoakam that's a good one! hey, Callie, if you can figure out "THE WALKING" I would love it cause the damn thing keeps eluding my meagre talents...and yes, wyo woman, I know the song from the movie soundtrack "til the end of the world" and also on jane's album "the angel looked down" I think it's called. I am a fan of her earlier funny albums (just kidding but her later stuff leaves me a bit cold but THE WALKING should have been huge up here in Canada but radio just ignored her)


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Subject: RE: BS: Divorce Music
From: WyoWoman
Date: 09 Jul 00 - 01:18 AM

I wonder, why's that?


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Subject: RE: BS: Divorce Music
From: Callie
Date: 09 Jul 00 - 06:29 AM

I don't know THE WALKING. Will post chords shortly ...

Callie


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Subject: RE: BS: Divorce Music
From: Margaret V
Date: 09 Jul 00 - 09:16 AM

"Calling All Angels" was written by Jane Siberry herself and it is on her album "When I Was a Boy" (one of my all-time favorite albums, by the way, though "The Walking" is right up there too). You can hear a sound clip of "Calling All Angels" at Jane's website, www.sheeba.ca/ All her lyrics are there too. Margaret


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Subject: RE: BS: Divorce Music
From: katlaughing
Date: 09 Jul 00 - 09:39 AM

Here ya go: click here


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Subject: Lyr/Chords Add: CALLING ALL ANGELS (Jean Siberry)
From: Callie
Date: 09 Jul 00 - 09:45 AM

NOT SURE HOW THE FORMATTING IS GOING TO GO, BUT TRY THIS! --Callie (with apologies to bflat - this is really off the topic. Hope you find the song somewhere and are able to enjoy it!)

The recording is in G, so you can play along with it with the following chords. It's hard to hear - without spending a few hours on it, it's hard to pin it down exactly, and the synth in the back I think is deliberately murky. There are lots of long passages where the chord doesn't exactly change from G, but there are lots of sus4 and Em with a G in the bass thrown in. Muck around with it!

Calling All Angels
instrumental bit is mainly G then Gsus4 and back to G in a 6/8 feel

I reckon you could play around with singing over this riff, but on the recording it sounds as though the chords do change once you get to the verse, as follows (approx):

G C
A man is placed upon the stairs


A baby cries and high above

G
You can hear the church bells start to ring.

C G
And the heaviness, the heaviness of it settles in. (Somewhere you can hear a voice sing...)

C D
Then it's one foot, then the other

C
as you step out on the road, ah,

G to G sus riff
step out on the road.

C D
And it's how long and how far and how many times

D
Oh, before it's too late?


C G
Calling all angels, calling all angels,

D G
Walk me through this world, don't leave me alone

C Em
Calling all angels, calling all angels,

D C
We're trying, we're hoping,

D G
but we're not sure how this goes.


D
Ah, every day you gaze upon

C G
the sunset with such dark intensity.

Gsus
Why, it's almost as if, if you could only crack the code

you'd finally understand

what this all means

C D
Ah, but if you could, do you think you would

trade it all, all the pain and suffering?

C D
Ah, but then you would have missed

C
the beauty of the light upon this earth

D D G
and the sweetness of the evening.

Calling all angels, calling all angels
Walk me through this world, don't leave me alone
Calling all angels, calling all angels
We're trying, we're hoping,
but we're not sure how this goes.

Repeat: Calling all angels, calling all angels
Walk me through this world, don't leave me alone
Calling all angels, calling all angels
We're trying, we're hoping,
We're hurting, we're loving, we're crying, we're calling
'cause we're not sure how this goes...


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Subject: RE: BS: Divorce Music
From: Margaret V
Date: 09 Jul 00 - 12:22 PM

In the second verse, the words are actually "such love and intensity," not "dark intensity." Also, it's "but then you'd miss the beauty of the light upon this earth, oh, and the sweetness of the leaving," not "evening." Such a beautiful song. . . Margaret


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Subject: RE: BS: Divorce Music
From: oggie
Date: 09 Jul 00 - 03:38 PM

As someone currently going through the process it ain't fun and, as was posted, 'amicable' is a misnomer.

Currently listening to Dick Gaughan's SAIL ON '..only a fool breaks their heart for what has gone...' and The John Wright Band album 'Other Roads' which has half a dozen suitable songs.

For peace and quiet (even as a non-practicing Christian), Choral Evensong sung by a good church choir has much to recommend it.

All the best

Steve (oggie)


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Subject: RE: BS: Divorce Music
From: WyoWoman
Date: 09 Jul 00 - 03:38 PM

Thanks all.And thanks, bflat, for stirring up this conversation, which led to this "Calling All Angels" fan club (although I keep writing it "Calling all Angles..." maybe "Calling all Anglers." No, no. That was on the fishing thread ...)

I'll go check out that CD. (Just when I think it's safe to put away my MasterCard ...)

ww


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Subject: RE: BS: Divorce Music
From: bflat
Date: 09 Jul 00 - 05:23 PM

kat, If you can walk me through what I should do I'd love to receive the Midi.

bflat


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Subject: RE: BS: Divorce Music
From: Margaret V
Date: 09 Jul 00 - 08:22 PM

Apologies for propagating the thread drift (should we start a separate "Calling All Angels" thread?!) but I wanted to mention something regarding WyoWoman's qualms about it "not being folk." The last time I saw Jane Siberry in concert, she said that "Calling All Angels" was actually the result of a "song challenge" (my mudcat metaphor, not her precise words) among a bunch of songwriters hanging out, if I remember correctly, at Peter Gabriel's place. Everyone was supposed to write a country song! So this is what she came up with. Does a Canadian genius spending time at the home of a famous rock star writing a "country" song that ends up in a major motion picture give us something that counts as "folk?" Sure! WyoWoman, you won't regret the credit card bill. Margaret


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Subject: RE: BS: Divorce Music
From: Callie
Date: 09 Jul 00 - 10:15 PM

Thanks for that interesting info Margaret. bflat, if you do happen to find the "Until The End of the World" soundtrack on which the song appears, you'll also find a very good version of Ray Davies' song "DAYS" performed by Elvis Costello. A bit of a wallowing song, but uplifting too.


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Subject: RE: BS: Divorce Music
From: Hollowfox
Date: 10 Jul 00 - 04:39 PM

I just re-discovered the perfect-for-me-at-the-moment song on the subject: "ONE MORE MINUTE" on Wierd Al Yankovic's "Dare to Be Stupid" album. Hilarious.


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Subject: RE: BS: Divorce Music
From: WyoWoman
Date: 11 Jul 00 - 12:54 AM

'Days' is a great song, too. When my daughter graduated from high school she used that text as part of a photo collage she did of her and her pals and gave to each of them as a graduation present. It was very cool and the text was completely appropriate... (Ok, ok. Just one more thing and then i'll stop creeping. I also love the T-Bone Burnett song "Humans from EArth" on that CD -- In fact, I think that CD ranks as just about my favorite compilation CD ever. It certainly is one I play again and again and continue to enjoy -probably a decade after i first purchased it... I can't remember when the movie came out, but I got the tape after I saw the movie and the CD after I wore out the tape ... I just wonder about who made those choices of what music to use. Whoever it was, he/she has great taste...)


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Subject: RE: BS: Divorce Music
From: Callie
Date: 11 Jul 00 - 02:31 AM

According to articles I read after seeing the film, Wim Wenders got a bunch of his favourite musicians together and asked them to record a song as they thought it might sound 20 years from now, to try to get a futuristic sound happening. The songs were all used in the film (which I'm still not sure about - was it really good or really bad? Dunno).

I hadn't thought about the cd until you brought up "Angels" WyoWoman. It's 9 years old - can you believe it? When I first heard it I thought it was so 'cutting edge'. Still sounds pretty fresh, eh? I particularly like Crime and the City Solution doing The Adversary.

Eek - this "Calling All Angels" stuff SHOULD have been a different thread.


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Subject: RE: BS: Divorce Music
From: katlaughing
Date: 11 Jul 00 - 04:35 AM

Sure thing, bflat, I'll send you a personal message about it.

This Angels stuff is interesting. Why don't one of you take some of it and paste it into a new thread, so it doesn't get lost and you can add more?

Thanks,

kat


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Subject: RE: BS: Divorce Music
From: bflat
Date: 17 Aug 00 - 05:09 PM

Help! Send me some reinforcement--please.

bflat


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Subject: RE: BS: Divorce Music
From: Callie
Date: 17 Aug 00 - 07:48 PM

hang in there bflat. Good things will come to you again - you are much to kind a soul for it not to come together for you.

Think about a few small things to look forward to. If there's nothing to look forward to, plan something. Small diversions and pleasures can lead to bigger fulfilment.

Callie


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Subject: RE: BS: Divorce Music
From: Matt Woodbury/Mimosa
Date: 17 Aug 00 - 08:35 PM

Currently I'm sing Willie Nelson's "CRAZY", and Sondheim's "Losing My Mind". I listened to my recording of "WIND BENEATH MY WINGS" which the Ex (of 3weeks now) requested I record, and I don't think I'll be doing that song for a while, or listening to it either. Ouch Mimosa (who's back in Dallas)


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Subject: RE: BS: Divorce Music
From: richlmo
Date: 17 Aug 00 - 10:26 PM

They aren't folk or blues,exactly 1. Heart Of the Matter - Don Henley 2. Last To Know-Dan Fogelberg I'm happily married ( 20 Years and counting ) , so what do I know?


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Subject: RE: BS: Divorce Music
From: Shanti
Date: 18 Aug 00 - 12:33 PM

bflat...as one who became another statistic in 1992, (after 23 years), I can truly sympathize. It does take time, but you will make it. God! That sounds so trite. The song that immediately came to my mind when I saw this thread was Patrick Sky's SEPARATION BLUES.

I'm not good advice, but I am an impartial listener if you need one. Write on the personal line if you want to.


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Subject: RE: BS: Divorce Music
From: Bert
Date: 18 Aug 00 - 01:03 PM

And there'll be times when you just want to sing Elliot Kenin's "Fuck Off and Die"


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Subject: RE: BS: Divorce Music
From: Mbo
Date: 18 Aug 00 - 01:07 PM

How about "I'm So Happy I Can't Stop Crying" by Sting (also redone as an awesome country hit by Toby Keith & Sting)?


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Subject: RE: BS: Divorce Music
From: katlaughing
Date: 18 Aug 00 - 01:15 PM

bflat, keep listening to those who've been through it...it will get better, trite as that may sound. I am sorry you are having a difficult time. Just remember, there IS something better coming your way.

Mimosa, the same goes for you. I am sorry to hear of the split. Keep singing and *harping*...you have a gift and by continuing to share you will enrich not only others' lives, but your own as well.

luvyaboth...kat


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Subject: Lyr Add: FAIR AND TENDER LADIES
From: GUEST,Hope
Date: 18 Aug 00 - 04:52 PM

For me, the top three (none of which are particularly folk, but they're all singable) were Reba McIntyre's "Take It Back," Linda Ronstadt's "You're No Good" and the Waitresses "No Guilt." Best folk -- The Water is Wide or Tiny Sparrow:

Come all ye fair and tender ladies
Take warning how you court your man
They're like the stars on a summer's morning
First they'll appear, and then they're gone

I wish I were a tiny sparrow
That I had wings, and I could fly
I'd fly away to my own true lover
And all he asked, I would deny

If I had known before I courted
What all his lying would have done
I'd have locked my heart in a box of golden
And never would have courted more...


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Subject: RE: BS: Divorce Music
From: bflat
Date: 18 Aug 00 - 07:16 PM

Hope,

The singable songs are terrific. Not familiar with Tiny Sparrow and it is not in the DT.

The lines that followed were maudlin and not with HOPE. Are you a contradiction? Hey, I've got enough grief without seeming to be grief. Thanks for the post.

Special thanks to Kat--sent a PM. You are a dear.

bflat


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Subject: RE: BS: Divorce Music
From: Lox
Date: 19 Aug 00 - 12:38 AM

Any Tom Waits

But it has to be sung by "Tom Waits"

Don't be fooled by bad impersonations of:

"TOM WAITS"


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Subject: RE: BS: Divorce Music
From: GUEST
Date: 26 Aug 00 - 07:08 PM

One of my favorite songs is "When The Children Are Asleep." I'm not sure that's the right title. My parents used to sing it together. It was fun to watch them. They were so goofy.


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Subject: Lyr Add: THANKS FOR THE MEMORY^^
From: Jim Dixon
Date: 25 Jan 01 - 08:22 PM

THANKS FOR THE MEMORY
(Lyrics by Leo Robin, tune by Ralph Rainger.)

Thanks for the memory
Of things I can't forget:
Journeys on a jet,
Our wond'rous week in Martinique,
And Vegas and roulette.
How lucky I was!

And thanks for the memory
Of summers by the sea,
Dawn in Waikiki.
We had a pad in London
But we didn't stop for tea.
How cozy it was!

Now since our breakup I wake up
Alone on a gray morning-after.
I long for the sound of your laughter,
And then I see
The laugh's on me.

But thanks for the memory,
Of every touch a thrill.
I've been through the mill.
I've lived a lot and learned a lot.
You loved me not, and still
I miss you so much.

Thanks for the memory
Of how we used to jog,
Even in a fog,
That barbecue in Malibu,
Away from all the smog.
How rainy it was!

Thanks for the memory,
Of letters I destroyed,
Books that we enjoyed.
Tonight the way things look,
I need a book by Sigmund Freud.
How brainy he was!

Gone are those evenings on Broadway.
Together we'd go to a great show.
But now I begin with the Late Show,
And wish that you
Were watching, too.

I know it's a fallacy,
That grown men never cry.
Baby, that's a lie,
We had our bed of roses
But forgot that roses die.
And thank you so much.

[Sung by Bob Hope and Shirley Ross in the film, "Big Broadcast of 1938."]


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Subject: RE: BS: Divorce Music
From: Noreen
Date: 26 Jan 01 - 12:35 PM

Thanks for the original post, bflat. I didn't read this thread the first time round, but now...

Noreen


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Subject: RE: BS: Divorce Music
From: mousethief
Date: 26 Jan 01 - 01:34 PM

For those not quite ready to let go, there's Bruce Cockburn's "What About the Bond?" (from the Humans album, 1980):

What About the Bond
by Bruce Cockburn

disharmony gives way
to mute helplessness
not enough communication
too much not expressed

it's all to easy
to let go of hope
to think there's nothing worth saving
and let it all go up in smoke

(Chorus:)
what about the the bond
what about the mystical unity
what about the bond
sealed in the loving presence of the Father

dysfunction
of the institutions
that should give a frame to work in
got to find our own solutions

confusion
pressure from all sides
got to head right down the centre
in the love that will abide

(repeat chorus)

man and a woman
made to be one flesh
nobody said it would be easy
but can we let go now and fail the test?

now you could say
life is full of moving on
but do you want the pain that's already been spent
to all be wasted -- c'mon

(repeat chorus)

(Ottawa, March 28th, 1980)


Next, for people who are wondering what happened, there's Al Stewart's fabulous "In the Dark" (from the Seemed Like a Good Idea at the Time album, 1999):

In the Dark
by Al Stewart

They said "God Bless the Prince of Wales
Let let us hope that he prevails."
The souvenirs provide details
Of distant monarchy

Moving through the human tide
With the Princess at his side
Tribesmen cheer and gaze wide-eyed
At such celebrity

The Royal smile from magazines
Waving hands from limousines
The crowd holds pictures of the Queen
The magic entity

These images are beamed to me
Ten thousand miles across the sea
Lately I don't seem to be
Concerned with what they mean

(Chorus:)
In the dark, in the dark
Oh I never saw the danger or the spark
In the dark, in the dark
I was feeling like a stranger
'Cause I never saw the changes in your heart

Those angry words you soon regret
Are gone but not forgotten yet
She may forgive, she won't forget
Each individual scar

You make it up and say no more
And go on living like before
But every wave erodes the shore
And tarnishes the star

You sow each seed of discontent
Wonder where the loving went
Every night that's heaven sent
The dawn can sweep away

And in the background all the time
Like some ironic church bell chime
You watch the Royal couple climb
Towards their destiny

(repeat chorus)

So yes, let's bless the Prince of Wales
Cheer for him and if all fails
Wrap him in Valkyries' sails
The golden vanity

I am free to choose my part
But still can't find the place to start
To find my way back to your heart
That place of mystery

In Africa the anchor slips
They bid farewell to the Royal ship
The newly painted fences chip
Life falls into routine

We go on from day to day
Living in the usual way
I don't know, and you won't say
What happened in between

(repeat chorus 2x)


This is from Paul Simon, on Graceland (1985?) for people who are ready to toss in the towel:

Crazy Love
by Paul Simon

Fat Charlie the Archangel
Sloped into the room
He said I have no opinion about this
And I have no opinion about that
Sad as a lonely little wrinkled balloon
He said well I don't claim to be happy about this, boys
And I don't seem to be happy about that

I don't want no part of this crazy love
I don't want no part of your love
I don't want no part of this crazy love
I don't want no part of your love
I don't want no part of this crazy love
I don't want no part of your love
I don't want no part of this crazy love
I don't want no part of this crazy love

She says she knows about jokes
This time the joke is on me
Well, I have no opinion about that
And I have no opinion about me

Somebody could walk into this room
And say your life is on fire
It's all over the evening news
All about the fire in your life
On the evening news

I don't want no part of this crazy love
I don't want no part of your love
I don't want no part of this crazy love
I don't want no part of your love

Fat Charlie the Archangel
Files for divorce
He says well this will eat up a year of my life
And then there's all that weight to be lost

She says the joke is on me
I say the joke is on her
I said I have no opinion about that
Well, we'll just have to wait and confer

I don't want no part of this crazy love
I don't want no part of your love
I don't want no part of this crazy love
I don't want no part of your love
I don't want no part of this crazy love
I don't want no part of your love
I don't want no part of this crazy love
I don't want no part of this crazy love


And from the wonderful and under-rated Bob Bennett comes this, once you're ready to laugh about it all, from the Songs From Bright Avenue album (1991):

Our Codependent Love
by Bob Bennett

I never did anything
You did not make me do
That's why I can't believe
You're telling me we're through
I sacrificed everything
It was the least that I could do
Now I'm paying the tab
And blaming it all on you
And our codependent love

Re-writing history
It's a twisted kind of fun
You can be Joan of Arc
And I'll be Atilla, hon'
When things get too complex
And I'm feelin' kinda bad
I shift myself into reverse
And blame my mom and dad
And our codependent love

No matter how hard I try
To live life to the full
I know I can never be good enough
Because I'm so dysfunctional

My life is so lonely now
The hours take too long
But I've got six feet worth of books
To tell me what went wrong
With our codependent love

When I need a vacation
From tormenting trouble and trial
I simply choose to take a cruise
To the Island of Denial
That Isle of Denial!

I'm faking my mental health
But I hope it never shows
Hey, I think your inner child
Just punched mine in the nose
There's one thing I have to know
And that will be enough
How did we ever get along
Before we knew all of this stuff
About our codependent love?

Our codependent love?
Our codependent love
Did-not-want-to-end-it love
Our codependent love
I'm the defendant guilty of
Our codependent love
I-could-not-mend-it love
Don't I look resplendent
In our codependent love?


Alex


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