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BS: Shane McBride's family history, eh?

Little Hawk 28 Sep 11 - 06:14 PM
gnu 28 Sep 11 - 06:20 PM
Little Hawk 28 Sep 11 - 06:26 PM
Rapparee 28 Sep 11 - 08:08 PM
JennieG 29 Sep 11 - 02:16 AM
Little Hawk 29 Sep 11 - 03:23 AM
Rapparee 29 Sep 11 - 08:45 AM
GUEST,leeneia 29 Sep 11 - 12:35 PM
Little Hawk 29 Sep 11 - 12:59 PM
gnu 29 Sep 11 - 02:52 PM
gnu 29 Sep 11 - 02:54 PM
Rapparee 29 Sep 11 - 02:59 PM
gnu 29 Sep 11 - 03:53 PM
Ed T 29 Sep 11 - 04:04 PM
Ed T 29 Sep 11 - 04:06 PM
Ed T 29 Sep 11 - 04:06 PM
GUEST,leeneia 29 Sep 11 - 04:10 PM
gnu 29 Sep 11 - 05:45 PM
gnu 29 Sep 11 - 06:03 PM
Rapparee 29 Sep 11 - 07:50 PM
Rapparee 30 Sep 11 - 10:33 AM
Rapparee 30 Sep 11 - 10:33 AM
Little Hawk 30 Sep 11 - 12:18 PM
Rapparee 30 Sep 11 - 03:34 PM
BTNG 30 Sep 11 - 03:41 PM
Little Hawk 30 Sep 11 - 04:31 PM
Rapparee 30 Sep 11 - 06:15 PM
Ed T 30 Sep 11 - 07:34 PM
BTNG 30 Sep 11 - 08:13 PM
Ed T 30 Sep 11 - 09:30 PM
TheFamousEccles 01 Oct 11 - 12:06 AM
Little Hawk 01 Oct 11 - 12:09 AM
gnu 01 Oct 11 - 07:12 PM
Rapparee 01 Oct 11 - 09:11 PM
Rapparee 02 Oct 11 - 10:54 AM
TheFamousEccles 02 Oct 11 - 05:39 PM
gnu 02 Oct 11 - 05:53 PM
Little Hawk 02 Oct 11 - 07:57 PM
Rapparee 02 Oct 11 - 09:01 PM
gnu 02 Oct 11 - 10:24 PM
GUEST,leeneia 03 Oct 11 - 12:00 AM
JennieG 03 Oct 11 - 01:01 AM
Rapparee 03 Oct 11 - 08:28 AM
GUEST,leeneia 03 Oct 11 - 10:06 AM
GUEST,crazy little woman 03 Oct 11 - 10:08 AM
Bob the Postman 03 Oct 11 - 10:10 AM
gnu 03 Oct 11 - 03:47 PM
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Subject: BS: Shane McBride's family history, eh?
From: Little Hawk
Date: 28 Sep 11 - 06:14 PM

The McBride family came over "on the boat" during the hard years of the Irish Potato Famine and have never looked back (well, maybe once or twice...) since. If they had looked back, they'd have seen an angry mob of creditors and disgruntled neighbours that they "borrowed" things from, plus probably a few Irish police officers.

The McBrides haled from the region around the Dingle Peninsula. They were famous in the area as drunkards, layabouts, and petty thieves blessed with an almost superhuman ability to avoid paying work and sidestep most forms of social responsibility. Due to the perenially roving eye and virtual unmarriageability of most of the McBride men, they fathered a very large number of children out of wedlock, so Shane has many relatives still living around the area of Dingle, most of whom are eager to deny any form of connection with him or his forbears and family name.

Having arrived in the new lands of North America in 1850 and settling in Nova Scotia, Shane's great grandfather decided to turn over a new leaf and started growing marijuana and selling it to the locals. At first this was a very small business which attracted little attention, so Shane's great grandfather was forced, much to his chagrin and shame, to accept normal work as a casual labourer, while abetting his meagre income with stolen horses, carriages, and light machinery. This led to an increasingly acrimonious relationship with the RCMP and the local police in Nova Scotia, eventually causing the McBride family to relocate to Blind River, Ontario. Shane's father, Sam McBride, started up a small marijuana grow-op in Blind River and eked out a precarious living by fencing stolen goods and forging checks.

Then the 60s came and all of a sudden Marijuana blossomed from being a minor cult phenomenon of a few jazz musicians to becoming a mainstream recreational drug embraced by an entire young generation!

The life of the McBride family was transformed. They could now afford takeout pizza at least 3 times a week, and the fridge was always full of Canadian beer. These were "the salad days".

It all went swimmingly until Shane's father fell asleep on the railroad tracks after an epic drinking session and got run over by a westbound train. They had to bury him in fifteen different pieces. The family was devastated.

But nothing can keep a McBride down forever. Shane and his brother Don swore on their father's grave (as well as pretty much everyplace else they went) that they would restore the "fambly fortune". This might sound difficult, but one should keep in mind that that would only require raising about $320. Within a year Shane and Don had built the marijuana business back up to the levels attained by their dad, and things were "lookin' good, eh?"

Then the cops ruined it all by busting the brothers and shutting down their grow-op! This led to a bitter vendetta between the McBride brothers and the police force which has persisted to this day, each determined to outlast the other and achieve final victory.

And there you have it. The glorious history of a proud Irish-Canadian family who have never forgotten their roots, never given up on their ideals, and never refused the challenges life has offered them.

Shane and Don McBride can be found today living in Blind River, often hanging out at the local Tim Hortons or the Iron Horse Tavern. They will sign autographs for free cigarettes or beer. They will accept friendly offers from single (or married) women with no strings attached. A book and movie deal is rumoured to be in the works as I speak, and the brothers will play themselves. Famed Hockey commentator Don Cherry will appear in a cameo role, as will a local police officer, the lovely Jennifer Dana. It's gonna be AWESOME!


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Subject: RE: BS: Shane McBride's family history, eh?
From: gnu
Date: 28 Sep 11 - 06:20 PM

If The Cherry brings his dog it will be an instant success.


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Subject: RE: BS: Shane McBride's family history, eh?
From: Little Hawk
Date: 28 Sep 11 - 06:26 PM

For sure, eh? I think the original dog died, but I trust he has gotten another to replace it.


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Subject: RE: BS: Shane McBride's family history, eh?
From: Rapparee
Date: 28 Sep 11 - 08:08 PM

Okay, Don Cherry will perform as Officer Jennifer Dana. That'll be interesting, so say the least.

Also, my earlier research shows that Shame McBride's ancestors included the Sawney Bean family of Scotland, Messrs. Burke and Hare, and several noted coprophiliacs.

If Shame thinks he came from the Dingle Peninsula, he could be correct. I know the area reasonably well, having been there a few times visiting my wife's folks, and there is a large gallows on top of a very prominent hill still awaiting the return of any of the McBride clan. (I looked very diligently for a photo which would show that, and I'll be danged if I can find a picture! If you wish to go there I can give you directions, however. It's straight up the hill from the old family farm.) While the death penalty no longer exists in Ireland, there is an exemption in both the modern and Brehon laws for Shame's family.

Come to think of it, there was a family in the area very well known for their women being "bush-strumpets" and the men were known for their lám-chairdes -- something that I'm certain Shame practices as his ancestors did before him.


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Subject: RE: BS: Shane McBride's family history, eh?
From: JennieG
Date: 29 Sep 11 - 02:16 AM

Ah, thank you so much, Little Hawk! Shane is such a unique....er....he's so unique (as of course is Don) that I had been wondering from where he sprung. Does the family have only the two boys, or are there other siblings? I had heard a rumour that there was a sister or two, but perhaps that was wrong.

Cheers
JennieG


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Subject: RE: BS: Shane McBride's family history, eh?
From: Little Hawk
Date: 29 Sep 11 - 03:23 AM

There have been rumors to that effect, but as far as I know there are only the 2 brothers, Shane and Don. It's always possible, I suppose, that Sam McBride might have fathered some illegitimate children here and there...McBride men tend to do that...but if so, I don't have any hard information about it, nor do Shane and Don.

There is a girl named Feral Sheryl who has a romantic interest in Shane (!). She is definitely a few beer short of a 6-pack. Shane started trying to avoid her after he realized she had matrimony in mind. Sheryl is hoping to entrap him by the oldest strategem of all, but hasn't succeeded in doing so as yet.

Shane's great dream is to marry Officer Jennifer Dana of the O.P.P. (Ontario Provincial Police). Ms Dana is an impressive young woman. She's tall, blonde, beautiful, efficient, extremely good at her job, and about as likely to marry Shane as to don a lizard suit and take up a job as a gargoyle on the parapets of Notre Dame Cathedral.

Nevertheless, she seems to feel a protective instinct where Shane is concerned, perhaps seeing a spark of decency in him that no one else has been able to detect. Although she has arrested him on various occasions when he broke the law, she has always looked out for his welfare and tried to keep him out of serious trouble both in and out of the slammer. She seems intent on reforming him or rescuing him from his depraved lifestyle.

Shane worships the ground she walks on. While he hates and detests cops in general, he adores Jennifer Dana. This amuses Don greatly, and he once attempted to make a pass at Ms Dana, but did not succeed. She put him in an armlock. When Shane found out about it later, he went berserk and broke Don's nose, while Don gave him a black eye and a couple of loose teeth in return. They didn't talk to each other for days after that.

Shane and Don are deeply attached to each other, though, because they are basically all they've got in this world, and as Shane often says, "Blood is thicker than water, eh?....Maybe even thicker than beer...or...ketchup...Well, okay, maybe not ketchup."

Matter of fact, Shane once saved Don's life from a convict named Snake when they were in jail together. Snake was a huge guy with an ugly attitude and a need to terrorize people. One day he tried to stick a knife in Don and Shane leaped on his back, whaled away on him, and choked him so hard that he lost consciousness, thus saving his big brother from an untimely demise. This was extraordinary heroism, something Shane has seldom shown, and it proves how deeply he does love his brother in the final analysis, despite periodic disagreements over women, beer, money, and other stuff like that.

Don is a pretty cool guy for a hoser. He drives a red pickup truck, works a real job at the local garage (in defiance of longstanding McBride tradition), and has had an almost endless succession of girlfriends over the years, most of them quite attractive...generally sort of working class girls with a yen for action, adventure, and a bit of risk. These are girls who are not afraid to enter a "wet T-shirt" contest at the Iron Horse Bar or drive at 120mph on backwoods logging roads. Don's success with women is so legendary, in fact, that he figured Jenny Dana would be an easy conquest, but it didn't turn out that way. He figures that she is too "stuck up" to go out with a hoser, "so flip her" (which is exactly what he had in mind).

Don's success with women is a constant annoyance to Shane. He comforts himself by drawing attention to the fact that Don is bald on top, while Shane still has all his hair...hair which, by the way, is in a mullet cut, dirty blonde hair, shaggy to just above the shoulders, and with the addition of a poorly trimmed mustache and a five o'clock shadow.

Shane figures that he is at least as cool as Johnny Depp, maybe moreso. (He's dead wrong about that.) He figures he is God's greatest gift to women. (Dead wrong again!) His greatest hero is Don Cherry, the Canadian TV hockey commentator. He hopes that Cherry will someday become Prime Minister of Canada.


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Subject: RE: BS: Shane McBride's family history, eh?
From: Rapparee
Date: 29 Sep 11 - 08:45 AM

Oh, c'mon, LH. You know that Shame's hair is "blonde" due to the effects of seagull droppings. His natural hair color is a sort of slimy puce. And that's not a mustache, but a fungus living on his nose drippings.


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Subject: RE: BS: Shane McBride's family history, eh?
From: GUEST,leeneia
Date: 29 Sep 11 - 12:35 PM

LH, is it me? I was in Canada for a week, and not one person said "eh".

The important thing about Don and Shane is not are they bald, are they shaggy, do they have 5 o'clock shadow? As far as women are concerned, the important thing is, "Does he have a twinkle in his eye?"

By the way, what's a hoser?


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Subject: RE: BS: Shane McBride's family history, eh?
From: Little Hawk
Date: 29 Sep 11 - 12:59 PM

"Eh?" is basically an Ontario expression as far as I know, and I think it's gradually dying out, probably due to television being mostly dominated by American programming.

"Does he have a twinkle in his eye?" ????????????? THAT'S the crucial matter in attracting women?

Shit.

NOW I find out. After all these years! AAAARGGGGHHH!

(sigh)

This explains why my friend David is irresistible to women. He ALWAYS has a twinkle in his eye. I only rarely do. I tend to be seeee-rious. It may be almost too late to do anything about this, I fear...

Okay, moving on...a "hoser" is another Canadian expression. It basically means a not very smart young man, probably rural, seldom employed, rather oafish, devoted to basic carnal pursuits among which are drinking, dope smoking, casual sex, sleeping in, eating pizza and other fast food, avoiding work, and being an irresponsible layabout.

Hosers tend to think they are pretty cool people, though, and they take pride in their working class origins and knowledge of heavy metal music. They make very poor husbands and have great difficulty staying employed for long. They have a very poor relationship with the forces of law and order, but cannot be called "criminals", because they aren't really dangerous...just a bit of an annoyance. Many hosers can be found in any Canadian town, usually hanging out at local bars or just standing around on the sidewalk and having a smoke.

Shane is the epitome of hoserhood. He has it totally mastered. Don is close...only he works a real job.


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Subject: RE: BS: Shane McBride's family history, eh?
From: gnu
Date: 29 Sep 11 - 02:52 PM

""Eh?" is basically an Ontario expression as far as I know, and I think it's gradually dying out, probably due to television being mostly dominated by American programming."

Take off eh, ya hoser.

Short for hosehead. One who has a hose connected to his head for continuous beer supply directly to the brain which makes one stunned as me arse all the time.

leeneia... where in Canada?


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Subject: RE: BS: Shane McBride's family history, eh?
From: gnu
Date: 29 Sep 11 - 02:54 PM

Wiki says... Like the very similar term hosehead, the term may have referred to farmers of the Canadian prairies, who would siphon gas from farming vehicles with a hose during the Great Depression of the 1930s.[citation needed] The expression has since been converted to the verb 'to hose' as in to trick, deceive, or steal - for example: "That card-shark sure hosed me." Hosed has an additional meaning of becoming drunk - for example: "Let's go out and get hosed." Another possible origin is derived from hockey slang. Before ice resurfacers, the losing team in a hockey game would have to hose down the rink after a game. Thus the term "hoser" being synonymous with "loser".

A hoser's flannel shirt may also be referred to as a "Kenora dinner jacket". (Some regional variations of this term also exist, usually substituting a hoser-stereotyped local community's name in place of Kenora.)


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Subject: RE: BS: Shane McBride's family history, eh?
From: Rapparee
Date: 29 Sep 11 - 02:59 PM

Shame's, on the other hand, is known as a "Mylunchiscomingup dinner jacket."

Shame is a hoser because he drools "like a leaky hose."


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Subject: RE: BS: Shane McBride's family history, eh?
From: gnu
Date: 29 Sep 11 - 03:53 PM

Yeah. Well here is a Kent County Tux


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Subject: RE: BS: Shane McBride's family history, eh?
From: Ed T
Date: 29 Sep 11 - 04:04 PM

Surely you do not mean this "Dingle"" in Nova Scotia? ""although the word 'dingle' means "a small wooded valley, a shady dell, a narrow cleft between hills", here in Halifax it refers to the Sir Sandford Fleming Park, or simply, Fleming Park""


The Dingle, Halifax, Nova Scotia


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Subject: RE: BS: Shane McBride's family history, eh?
From: Ed T
Date: 29 Sep 11 - 04:06 PM

In "the Dingle" park in Halifax Nova Scotia, there lies a Frog Pond>
That would seem like a more proper place for Shane to reside in, or near


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Subject: RE: BS: Shane McBride's family history, eh?
From: Ed T
Date: 29 Sep 11 - 04:06 PM

In "the Dingle" park in Halifax Nova Scotia, there lies a Frog Pond>
That would seem like a more proper place for Shane to reside in, or near


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Subject: RE: BS: Shane McBride's family history, eh?
From: GUEST,leeneia
Date: 29 Sep 11 - 04:10 PM

A hoser sounds like the guys we call rowdy or ornery (pronounced on-ree down here in Missouri.) 'Redneck' isn't quite degenerate enough.
===========
I think Fred Astaire was a good example of a guy with a twinkle in his eye. For example:

Uptight Russian secret policewoman: Are you the oppressor or the oppressed?

Fred Astaire: Oh, an oppressor. I'm sure as a fellow oppressor you agree it's much the best position.
===========

gnu, we went to the Rockies for a week.   Jasper, Yoho and Banff National Parks. The mountains were incredible, and we saw caribou and bears. Not many birds, though.

It was a wonderful trip.


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Subject: RE: BS: Shane McBride's family history, eh?
From: gnu
Date: 29 Sep 11 - 05:45 PM

leeneia... well there ya go eh? Full of tourists and yuppies. Not many Eh-typical types around sure.

But, better'n a week in the fly-infested bog country of Kent County New Brunswick wit da loikes far worse than there Shane. Even Rap wouldn't mess wit da boys up country eh.


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Subject: RE: BS: Shane McBride's family history, eh?
From: gnu
Date: 29 Sep 11 - 06:03 PM

oops... than that there Shane


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Subject: RE: BS: Shane McBride's family history, eh?
From: Rapparee
Date: 29 Sep 11 - 07:50 PM

Rap doesn't "mess" with anyone.


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Subject: RE: BS: Shane McBride's family history, eh?
From: Rapparee
Date: 30 Sep 11 - 10:33 AM

Come to think of it, doesn't Shame's ancestors hold some kind of record for inbreeding? I think it was in the Guinness Book where I saw that. They were breeding for ugly, filthy, lazy, drunken, vermin attraction, stupidity and criminality, as I recall. Shame is the apogee (or perigee) of their centuries of effort.


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Subject: RE: BS: Shane McBride's family history, eh?
From: Rapparee
Date: 30 Sep 11 - 10:33 AM

Oh, the point was to raise the family standards.


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Subject: RE: BS: Shane McBride's family history, eh?
From: Little Hawk
Date: 30 Sep 11 - 12:18 PM

Shane is indeed the crowning culmination of centuries, perhaps milennia of McBride selective breeding. He has achieved an awesome level of hoserhood surpassed by none. I expect that one day a monument will be erected in stone in appreciation of his unique contributions to North Ontario culture...such as it is.


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Subject: RE: BS: Shane McBride's family history, eh?
From: Rapparee
Date: 30 Sep 11 - 03:34 PM

Or a dump.


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Subject: RE: BS: Shane McBride's family history, eh?
From: BTNG
Date: 30 Sep 11 - 03:41 PM

there are rumours (or rumors, if you will) that there are members of The McBride family in Saskatchewan, at least that's what the police forces here keep saying, approach with caution is the favoured (or favored, if you will) response by the law...


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Subject: RE: BS: Shane McBride's family history, eh?
From: Little Hawk
Date: 30 Sep 11 - 04:31 PM

There is also a clone of Shane living out in B.C., I think maybe in Vancouver. His name is Shawn McBaird. He was the discarded first attempt by the Greys (space aliens) to clone Shane back to life after he died in a freak accident...he was crushed in a trash compactor in Sudbury while attempting to flee from the police. The Greys didn't get it quite right the first time, in terms of balancing the various elements in Shane's personality. Being desirous of not hurting any lifeform, they named that first attempt "Shawn McBaird" and beamed him over to B.C. so that it would be unlikely he'd run into Shane on the street, but he could still live a Canadian life, eh?

The Greys then successfully cloned Shane on the 2nd attempt and returned him to his normal life in North Ontario. The main change was that he got a brand new set of perfect teeth to replace the old ones. Damn good thing! The old ones were not in good shape.

There are rumours that Shawn McBaird has started up a heavy metal band in Vancouver and is busy destroying people's eardrums and inciting riots. If so, he has realized a lifelong dream of Shanes! Shane can only play air guitar. It may be that Shawn got an excess of musical tendencies programmed into him in the first cloning. But I'll have to hear the band first to be certain about that.


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Subject: RE: BS: Shane McBride's family history, eh?
From: Rapparee
Date: 30 Sep 11 - 06:15 PM

...or a sewage lagoon.


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Subject: RE: BS: Shane McBride's family history, eh?
From: Ed T
Date: 30 Sep 11 - 07:34 PM

Vancouver? Maybe, Hastings Street.


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Subject: RE: BS: Shane McBride's family history, eh?
From: BTNG
Date: 30 Sep 11 - 08:13 PM

For the love of God! Don't mention THAT episode on Hastings Street. We had a devil of time hushing the incident up, keeping the police away and paying off the right people with, shall we say, appropriate amounts of cash. The goat will be in therapy for quite sometime yet has developed a nervous tic in its right eye and continues to mumble something about keyholes.


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Subject: RE: BS: Shane McBride's family history, eh?
From: Ed T
Date: 30 Sep 11 - 09:30 PM

Where's Shane?


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Subject: RE: BS: Shane McBride's family history, eh?
From: TheFamousEccles
Date: 01 Oct 11 - 12:06 AM

The rumours are the RCMP has McBridewatch is the south-eastern corner of
Saskatchewan. SaskPower has reported an increase use of electricity and the recent arrival of a Tige McBride, a cousin 5-times removed, and why he was removed he will not dwell on this time, but the dog is doing okay, in Estevan, working at Boundary Dam. A new greenhouse has been build on an acreage near the dam. And new supergrass is now circulating   
that is said to cause Satan to have shakes and politcos to tell the truth. Now Tige is the first SK Public Enemy #1, and most popular person of the UofR campus.


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Subject: RE: BS: Shane McBride's family history, eh?
From: Little Hawk
Date: 01 Oct 11 - 12:09 AM

I don't think Shane is anywhere near mean enough to do well in a place like Hastings Street in Vancouver. He'd be horrified by what's going on there. This guy, Shawn McBaird, though...he may be a different story. The question is, how many of Shane's good traits were passed on to Shawn? This would depend on how effectively the Greys calibrated and tuned the cloning device. It is also possible that some genes from a stray cat or dog got mixed in with the material they salvaged from the garbage.

The Greys have taken care to prevent Shane and Shawn from every meeting one another face to face as it might cause some kind of dimensional shift and bring about the catastrophic destruction or permanent alteration of the world as we know it...specially if they were ever to make direct physical contact!

Let's hope Shawn's band never plays in Blind River. That would not be good.


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Subject: RE: BS: Shane McBride's family history, eh?
From: gnu
Date: 01 Oct 11 - 07:12 PM

Ed... that's a very disturbing video. Sad. Shaking to the core. In the "best city in the world". Sickening. Something is wrong.


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Subject: RE: BS: Shane McBride's family history, eh?
From: Rapparee
Date: 01 Oct 11 - 09:11 PM

...take up arms against a sea of troubles, and by opposing, end them.


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Subject: RE: BS: Shane McBride's family history, eh?
From: Rapparee
Date: 02 Oct 11 - 10:54 AM

To get back to the topic, I'm still not really convinced that Shame's family HAD a history. I kinda think Shame crawled out of the filth and ooze of a North Ontario cesspool and was taken in by a pitying McBride family.


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Subject: RE: BS: Shane McBride's family history, eh?
From: TheFamousEccles
Date: 02 Oct 11 - 05:39 PM

Recently the sporadic reports of a hairy, ugly and malodorous creature with three legs in woods around near LaRonge in Northern Saskatchewan excited much discussion during July and August of this year. It was said the sight of the thing was enough cause male bears to hide and weep, along with many Sasquatches.

Well, it turned out to be none other than Tige's younger brother, Jack 'The Skunk' McBride, Regina enforcer for the family. His body odour is so notorious, just the threat of removing his jacket was enough for the Hell's Angels to pay tribute. The smell forms a force field around him so powerful that is impregnable to bullets, radiation and hell-fire.

Professors at the University of Saskatchewan have offered Jack as proof that Cro-Magnon and Neanderthal were not separate species but sub-species of Homo Sapiens. The cross-breeding usual occurred after Cro-Magnon males indulged in the drink called by Neanderthal females called red power juice. This also where the term 'coyote ugly' originated, after the males awoke and found out what had happened.

Despite the reaction males have to his odour, it is strangely attractive females, so there are now numerous children running around Regina who look like Jack.

The Investigative Bureau of Saskatchewan (IBS) has announced that Jack has promised to refrain from walking through the north woods naked, frighten old men and exciting old maids. He confine his nude rambling to his moated and walled LaRonge compound. The bear and Sasquatch populations has only recently been seen in there area.

Oh yes. The report of the third leg. That is another reason Jack is popular with the female population.


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Subject: RE: BS: Shane McBride's family history, eh?
From: gnu
Date: 02 Oct 11 - 05:53 PM

Sounds like Shane... just a big dick.


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Subject: RE: BS: Shane McBride's family history, eh?
From: Little Hawk
Date: 02 Oct 11 - 07:57 PM

Yeah, I was sort of wondering about the third leg. Shane yearns to have a whanger of such monstrous proportions, but the rumour is that it's pretty much average, size-wise.


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Subject: RE: BS: Shane McBride's family history, eh?
From: Rapparee
Date: 02 Oct 11 - 09:01 PM

Actual photos taken by the OPP on various occasions shows that, like Shame, there is much less there than meets the eye.


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Subject: RE: BS: Shane McBride's family history, eh?
From: gnu
Date: 02 Oct 11 - 10:24 PM

The OPP dicks take pics of dicks?


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Subject: RE: BS: Shane McBride's family history, eh?
From: GUEST,leeneia
Date: 03 Oct 11 - 12:00 AM

Y'all have overdone it. You're beginning to sound like teenagers spreading rumors about a kid who's not cool.

I bet Shane is an okay guy who drinks beer, does a little dope, doesn't mow his lawn much because it actually contains no grass, and is the guy you would call for help if your car broke down 100 miles, I mean kilometers, from home.


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Subject: RE: BS: Shane McBride's family history, eh?
From: JennieG
Date: 03 Oct 11 - 01:01 AM

So if neither Shane nor Don breed, that would be the end of the McBride line? or of that particular branch, at least?

Praise the Lord for small mercies.......


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Subject: RE: BS: Shane McBride's family history, eh?
From: Rapparee
Date: 03 Oct 11 - 08:28 AM

I bet if my car breaks down I'd call AAA, CAA, or AA. If Shame did show up I would call S&W.


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Subject: RE: BS: Shane McBride's family history, eh?
From: GUEST,leeneia
Date: 03 Oct 11 - 10:06 AM

Yeah, right. Rap, you are so tough. ;)

Every circle of acquaintance needs somebody uncool who gets invited to parties so he can put away the tables and chairs when it's over. I bet Shane is the guy.

I'm familiar with this because I'm that kind of person. My church once mounted a campaign to restore its stained-glass, and my husband and I helped a lot. At the end there was a thank-you dinner for the donors and volunteers. We were honored guests, but we also found ourselves cleaning up after it.

My husband was irritated, but I just laughed.


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Subject: RE: BS: Shane McBride's family history, eh?
From: GUEST,crazy little woman
Date: 03 Oct 11 - 10:08 AM

Yep, yep. It's an old story.

I bet he plays banjo at their parties too. And when there's a potluck, Shane brings meat and all the others bring bags of chips.


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Subject: RE: BS: Shane McBride's family history, eh?
From: Bob the Postman
Date: 03 Oct 11 - 10:10 AM

Behold the shocking evidence that Saskatchewan has indeed suffered an infestation of McBrides. An RCMP task force is said to be investigating the possibility that Sam hid out there for a spell in the Fifties.


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Subject: RE: BS: Shane McBride's family history, eh?
From: gnu
Date: 03 Oct 11 - 03:47 PM

Kinda odd that they they would attack the ambulance if they were defending their god given right to get drunk and drive their ATVs where the law says you can't. I would ask a question at this point but I'd be assailed for asking it. I think I know the answer. And, no, I won't ask it if asked to do so... I can't be strung up for what I am thinking.


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Subject: RE: BS: Shane McBride's family history, eh?
From: GUEST,Blind DRunk in Blind River
Date: 03 Oct 11 - 04:02 PM

There are a lotta flippin' LIES bein' told here, eh? I hardly flippin' know where to start! Whatta buncha flipheads youse peple must be!

My fambly is proud to be from Ireland, the flippin' greenest place on the face of the flippin' Eathr! When St Patrick's Day rolls around we get so flippin' wasted that you would not even believe it.

We are also real proud to be Canadian, eh? I mean those of us that, like, came here to Canada. Canada is the greatest place in the whole flippin' world, eh? Where else do you got Brador Beer, Don Cherry, and the Big Nickle? Eh? Nowheres else! That is why Canada rules!

Them peple in Saskeatchewan was dead flippin' RIGHT to attack the flippin' cops. The cops was innerferin' in privae busines like they usually do and they didn't have no bizness to do that, eh? Okay, it was goin' a bit too far to attack the ambullance...I would not of done that...but ya gotta give people some leeway when they are drinkin' cos things can get a bit outta hand, you know?

Anyways, I figger there are some proud McBrides livin' in every province of Canada by now. No fear of that, eh?

This bolthole that calls himself Shawn McBaird is a total idiot that don't have no right to be showin' his face arownd anywheres, and if I ever see him I will kick his ass! He is just a pail refleckshun of ME. Same goes for Rapparee. He is lower than a snake's coal chute. What a flippin' waste of valyable space that idiot is!

And what is this about me bein' uncool!???? I am the coolest dude within 8000 flippin' miles! Everyone knows that, eh? Women all want me. Men all wish they was me. That is all their is to it and nothin' more to be said about it.

- Shane


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Subject: RE: BS: Shane McBride's family history, eh?
From: gnu
Date: 03 Oct 11 - 06:41 PM

Shane... Del tells me, after huntin season and Johnny gets off parole (you remember the insurance thing?), him and Johnny and Dale are gonna come and visit youse guys, as long as Dale stays outta jail an Daisy don't get knocked up again. She's wild when she's with eh.

They are gonna buy a comeback at the auction and drive up and sell it and rent a U-Haul and fill it with cheap beer on the way back in La Belle Province. That'll pay fer the trip and make enough money ta feed the still fer the winter, especially when they don't pay the U-Haul bill. Sounds like a plan eh?

An Del asked me how much smoke is goin fer in Uppity Canada. It's October eh? An we ain't had a frost to speak of yet so the buds are huge man. We're talkin 8 to 10 feet tall! ALL females! Gonna have turkey at Xmas this year insteada moose. Livin the high life eh. Don't get much better n that.


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Subject: RE: BS: Shane McBride's family history, eh?
From: Rapparee
Date: 03 Oct 11 - 10:17 PM

I have found that, without a doubt, Shame McBride is a carbon-based, bipedal, drooling, parasitical, non-sapient pseudo-life form resulting from the asexual division of certain as yet unidentified amino acids in the double helix (which is thought in his case to be a single helix).


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