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BS: Smoking Licence

Doc John 16 Feb 08 - 01:52 PM
McGrath of Harlow 16 Feb 08 - 02:45 PM
Peace 16 Feb 08 - 02:54 PM
Peace 16 Feb 08 - 02:58 PM
Peace 16 Feb 08 - 03:04 PM
skipy 16 Feb 08 - 07:41 PM
Richard Bridge 17 Feb 08 - 06:18 AM
Ernest 17 Feb 08 - 10:52 AM
Rt Revd Sir jOhn from Hull 17 Feb 08 - 10:55 AM
Mr Happy 17 Feb 08 - 12:50 PM
Doc John 17 Feb 08 - 01:02 PM
McGrath of Harlow 17 Feb 08 - 02:17 PM
Sorcha 17 Feb 08 - 03:52 PM
Bonecruncher 17 Feb 08 - 08:45 PM
Peace 17 Feb 08 - 08:47 PM
Ernest 18 Feb 08 - 02:12 AM
Dave the Gnome 18 Feb 08 - 06:15 AM
GUEST,CrazyEddie 18 Feb 08 - 06:25 AM
Dave the Gnome 18 Feb 08 - 07:58 AM
McGrath of Harlow 18 Feb 08 - 05:38 PM
Big Phil 18 Feb 08 - 06:34 PM
Rt Revd Sir jOhn from Hull 18 Feb 08 - 07:22 PM
McGrath of Harlow 18 Feb 08 - 07:28 PM
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Subject: BS: Smoking Licence
From: Doc John
Date: 16 Feb 08 - 01:52 PM

A government (UK) health advisor has proposed a £10 smoking licence. At £10 it isn't going to deter anybody and how on earth is it going to be enforced? About the daftest thing I've heard. Perhaps I can get a job as a government adviser, in the treasury maybe; what daft taxes can I think up?
Doc John


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Subject: RE: BS: Smoking Licence
From: McGrath of Harlow
Date: 16 Feb 08 - 02:45 PM

It'd backfire. Once you'd got a smoking licence you'd be likely to feel you ought to light up or it'd be a wsste.

I wonder if a Smoking Test is envisaged to go with it? You'd have to prove you could do a roll-up, or keep a pipe alight...


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Subject: RE: BS: Smoking Licence
From: Peace
Date: 16 Feb 08 - 02:54 PM

If they have the sense to make the licenses from rolling papers, it'll give them a utilty beyond their face value, imo. BUT, on a serious note, is there a test to get the license? We have them for hunting, fishing and driving, so why not for smoking? Geeze, to get the license you have to be able to

1) roll a smoke

2) light it with a single match in a Force 8 wind

3) name and spell 40 of the chemicals found in treated tobacco

4) and tell who brought tobacco back to England from the New World


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Subject: RE: BS: Smoking Licence
From: Peace
Date: 16 Feb 08 - 02:58 PM

acetone (finger nail polish remover)
cadmium (used in batteries)
hexamine (barbecue lighter)
acetic acid (vinegar)
carbon monoxide (car exhaust)
hydrogen cyanide (poison)
ammonia (toilet cleaner)
carbon monoxide (car exhaust)
methane (sewer gas)
arsenic (poison)
DDT/Dieldrin (used to kill bugs)
methanol (rocket fluid)
butane (lighter fluid)
ethanol (alcohol)
napthalene (mothballs)
nicotine (insecticide)
stearic acid (candle wax)
toluene (industrial solvent)


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Subject: RE: BS: Smoking Licence
From: Peace
Date: 16 Feb 08 - 03:04 PM

McG of H: Sorry. Didn't see your post. (Great minds . . . .)


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Subject: RE: BS: Smoking Licence
From: skipy
Date: 16 Feb 08 - 07:41 PM

This next to the smoking ban in pubs is the biggest load of bollox yet! It is the thin of the wedge though, what about motorcyclalists, skiers, rugby players etc. etc. they all put themselves at risk! What about class A drug users (kill them I say) & people who drink drive, or steal cars when they have no licence (driving licence that is not one to steal cars!) etc. etc. Oh! been gardening have you, that's a dangerous way to spend a Sunday afternoon we will have to charge you for it, what paid in all your life! Well sorry there is no money left to treat you, just crawl off & die, next please!


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Subject: RE: BS: Smoking Licence
From: Richard Bridge
Date: 17 Feb 08 - 06:18 AM

How about a screwing licence? That ought to raise - err- something.


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Subject: RE: BS: Smoking Licence
From: Ernest
Date: 17 Feb 08 - 10:52 AM

Richard: Isn`t a license to screw people usually called "admission to the bar"?

;0)
Ernest@law


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Subject: RE: BS: Smoking Licence
From: Rt Revd Sir jOhn from Hull
Date: 17 Feb 08 - 10:55 AM

bloody stupid idea, they'll try to bring out a licence to sing in pubs next!


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Subject: RE: BS: Smoking Licence
From: Mr Happy
Date: 17 Feb 08 - 12:50 PM

..............& we'll all need a permit to imbibe the beverages they sell!


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Subject: RE: BS: Smoking Licence
From: Doc John
Date: 17 Feb 08 - 01:02 PM

Well we already pay a substantial 'licence' fee, Mr Happy


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Subject: RE: BS: Smoking Licence
From: McGrath of Harlow
Date: 17 Feb 08 - 02:17 PM

Tax on grumbling...


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Subject: RE: BS: Smoking Licence
From: Sorcha
Date: 17 Feb 08 - 03:52 PM

OK, let's do a license to Breathe...oh, your wife had a baby? Do you have it's license to breathe? No? Why not?

Oh, you couldn't get one until it was born. I see. Well now that it is born, it doesn't have a license...so .......and so forth. Catch 22.

It may well come to this friends.


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Subject: RE: BS: Smoking Licence
From: Bonecruncher
Date: 17 Feb 08 - 08:45 PM

Richard's suggestion for a licence on screwing - have a meter fitted and be assessed on time, speed and distance travelled.
Colyn.


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Subject: RE: BS: Smoking Licence
From: Peace
Date: 17 Feb 08 - 08:47 PM

Bugger that. Have a meter MAID fitted and the rest is academic!


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Subject: RE: BS: Smoking Licence
From: Ernest
Date: 18 Feb 08 - 02:12 AM

A smoking license indicates malicious arson - so be careful and speak to your lawyer.
Regards
Ernest@law


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Subject: RE: BS: Smoking Licence
From: Dave the Gnome
Date: 18 Feb 08 - 06:15 AM

If there was a licence on screwing the government would be paying a hell of a lot. They screw millions of us all the time...

:D


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Subject: RE: BS: Smoking Licence
From: GUEST,CrazyEddie
Date: 18 Feb 08 - 06:25 AM

Ah, but to get your (photo) licence, you'll need to prove your age. They'll set the age limit to 18, & try to use this to stop under 18s from buying tobacco.


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Subject: RE: BS: Smoking Licence
From: Dave the Gnome
Date: 18 Feb 08 - 07:58 AM

I think it went up to 18 a few months ago, Eddie. Well, looking at the notices in shops it seems to have! Eeeeh, and I remember the days when on your twelth birthday you were taken for a glass of gin, a pipe full of black twist and a good shag in a brothel. Or was it a good shag in the pipe and a black twist in the brothel? Hmmm.

:D


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Subject: RE: BS: Smoking Licence
From: McGrath of Harlow
Date: 18 Feb 08 - 05:38 PM

Don't most people in the UK these days tend to buy their tobacco in the pub from someone who's brought it in from abroad where it's cheaper?


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Subject: RE: BS: Smoking Licence
From: Big Phil
Date: 18 Feb 08 - 06:34 PM

Life in 2008 under NEW Labour, if it moves, tax it, if it does not move, tax it, and some clowns will still vote for them next time.

Phil*


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Subject: RE: BS: Smoking Licence
From: Rt Revd Sir jOhn from Hull
Date: 18 Feb 08 - 07:22 PM

this gverment is rubbish.


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Subject: RE: BS: Smoking Licence
From: McGrath of Harlow
Date: 18 Feb 08 - 07:28 PM

Not especially. Goverment is rubbish, that's a truer statement of the case.


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