Mudcat Café message #627175 The Mudcat Café TM
Thread #43033   Message #627175
Posted By: Stilly River Sage
13-Jan-02 - 01:57 PM
Thread Name: BS: sliding into a depression
Subject: RE: BS: sliding into a depression
RD--you've tapped into a great supportive group here. Such good advice from people who have exerienced what you're going through.

I had a problem with losing weight during serious depression (prior to filing for divorce). I was skin and bones when I finally "saw" myself in the mirror and realized I had to do something. Exercise did help increase my appetite, and I made sure I ate several small meals during the day. I was probably getting too much sleep, and it all felt like it was fetal position.

I found that making a list of things I needed to do each day, and crossing them off as they were finished was a help. But this only works if your list is realistic and if you include the daily maintenance stuff. Dishes, cooking, laundry, tidying your bedroom, cleaning the cat box. Because just getting through the day is demonstrated when you see on paper all that you really do. Add some task you've wanted to accomplish--paying bills is a good one, or perhaps (and I find very soothing) writing a letter to a friend. A pen and paper kind of letter, with a stamp on it.

My cat has always been good company, and I would hazard a guess that over the years the simple act of taking care of something else that is dependent on me has made a difference. Now that I have children, when I feel depression coming on, I make a point of doing things with them, and being sure that we follow our regular comfort rituals (foods we particularly like at meals, reading a good book at bedtime).

I resisted medications for my depression, because I knew the source of my feelings (divorce) and felt that my brain was trying to tell me to sort it out. As I went through that natural period of adjustment I didn't want to "defer" the process. I was able to get by without medcations, but not everyone can. Take advantage of the resources available. Work out a plan for the future--this helped me most of all--knowing what I wanted to do with myself in the future (I went back to school for my master's, to start with). And it is true--having a good friend to talk to is as good as going into therapy.