Mudcat Café message #3763955 The Mudcat Café TM
Thread #61416   Message #3763955
Posted By: GUEST,Winsleydale
09-Jan-16 - 02:46 AM
Thread Name: Lyr Req: Turkish Delight (Ray Noble)
Subject: RE: Lyr Req: Turkish Delight (Ray Noble)
Here's what I've come up with, based on my copy of the record and what has already been posted here. Some of the choruses are probably wrong, they are difficult to understand on the record, but I wrote what sounded similar and made some sense.

Turkish Delight, Part One
(A-Side)
Ray Noble and his Mayfair Orchestra
1933
This musical travelogue comes to you by courtesy of the Persian Cap and Carpet Company, whose slogan, "As snug as a bug in a Persian rug," is known all over Wiggam.
(Arab)I sell you a nice carpet, Master. Lovely carpet, very cheap…
Quite, yes. Quite. We are now in the native quarter, which occupies more than three quarters of Baghdad.
(Arab)You want to see pretty postcards, Master? All real photos…
Go away. On our left hand is a large mosque, and on our right, several small mosques, or 'mosquitoes.' The smell is terrible.
(Arab)Alms for the love of Allah!
Oh, take no notice of him. Uh, facing us is a minaret. It is a very old one, and it is rather high. In fact, it is so high that the smell is terrible.
(Arab)You like pretty ladies? I show you lovely dancing girls, ey?
Pardon me one moment – Uh, are they really a bit of alright, these dancing girls? Can you take them – Oh, don't be silly.
Once there was a caliph and he lived in old Baghdad,
The poor old bloke's been dead for years but who cares about that?
He couldn't sleep a wink at night, he had two hundred wives,
Who had to tell him stories, otherwise they lost their lives.

(Chorus)They all told tales, so the first wife told her tale.

King Solomon, that wise old man, he had a thousand wives,
He bought a lovely charabanc to take them all for drives,
The charabanc broke down one night, and here's where trouble starts,
His wives were waiting in a row, but he'd got no spare parts!

(Chorus)All day, oh my, so the next wife told her tale.

Aladdin loved a princess whom they call "Belle Troubador,"
And though he loved her dearly, she loved Aladdin more.
She opened wide the palace gates to let her drunken dad in,
And who can blame her if, by chance, she sometimes let Aladdin.

(Chorus)Oh, dirty girl! So the next wife told her tale.

Abdullah had a little lamp, he swapped it for a camel.
He didn't like its color, so he daubed it with enamel.
The hot sun melted all the paint while crossing the Sahara,
He can't get off because the paint is stuck to his tarara.

(Chorus) Ah-ah-ah-ah, so the next wife told her tale.

(Arab)Alms for the love of Allah!
(Arab)Legs for the love of Allah!
(Tourist)No more wives for the love of my—
Oh, lots more wives, yes, dear boy.
(Tourist)Where are they?
On the other side.
------------ 
Turkish Delight, Part Two
(B-Side)
Ray Noble and his Mayfair Orchestra
1933
(Chorus)Here we are again! So the next wife told her tale.

Once there was a plumber and he left behind his tools,
He always had to do it; it was in the union rules.
He fell into a cistern, and when his mate returned,
It took three years to get him out, what overtime he earned!

(Chorus)Yah, yah, yah, yah, so the next wife told her tale.

A young commercial traveler came to Baghdad one day,
He climbed upon the harem walls to watch the girls at play.
He promised to be good, but when the bathing girls appeared,
He got so agitated that he fell and broke his word.

(Chorus)We want hot dog! So the next wife told her tale.

There was a bloke named Omar and he wore a ruby 'at.
He lived on loaves of bread and thou, but who cares about that?
I can't tell you when he was born, the only date that sticks,
Is Will-I-Am the Conqueror, and that's 1066.

(Chorus)Oh, do ya know? So the next wife told her tale.

Once there were two dancing girls who went about in gauze,
And when they danced in cabarets, they were enormous draws.
The chief of police arrested them for showing too much zeal,
He didn't mind the upper deck, but couldn't stand the keel.

(Chorus)How was that keel? And we haven't got any more wives.
This musical travelogue comes to you by courtesy of the Persian Cap and Carpet Company, whose slogan, "As snug as a bug in a Persian rug," is still known all over Wiggam.
In a few moments, from the highest minaret, you will hear the muezzin calling the faithful to assemble.

Thanks very much.