Mudcat Café message #307350 The Mudcat Café TM
Thread #25845   Message #307350
Posted By: JenEllen
28-Sep-00 - 11:50 AM
Thread Name: Lyr Req: Palindrome (parody of Paladin)
Subject: Lyr Add: BALLAD OF PALINDROME (parody of Paladin) ya go. Now it’s stuck in my head for the rest of the day...thanks a LOT!


BALLAD OF PALINDROME (parody of Paladin)

....And now, some words about a show forthcoming on the CBC television network.....

There are campfire legends that the Plainsmen spin
Of a man who was nothing like Paladin.
Couldn’t ride couldn’t shoot, but he won his fame
'Cause everything he said, said backwards
Was the saaaaaaaaame.
Palindrome, Palindrome, what’s in a name?
Palindrome, Palindrome, backwards the same.

Yes, Palindrome. No one knew where he came from, and nobody cared....He rode into town one day from out of the West, armed not with a six-gun, a long rifle, a whip, a knife, a chainsaw, or some other exotic weapon. No, his only means of self defense was his snappy little straw hat, and his uncanny ability to speak only in sentences which when spelled backwards, were exactly the same as when they were spelled forwards...Here’s a scene from a forthcoming episode of Palindrome.

“Howdy, stranger.”
“Well, what’s your name, pardner?”
“Madam. I’m Adam.”
“Oh, well, how’d ya get into town? I didn’t see a horse.”
“A Toyota.”
“Sounds like you have a little sinus problem?”
“Tons o’ snot.”
“Hey doc, how about a drink for my new friend here?”
“Well, he sure could use it. Look at him. His mouth’s hangin’ wide open.”
“In it, ram a martini.”
“Sorry, stranger, no hard liquor here. Would you like some wine, or some kind of beer?”
“Lager, sir, is regal.”
“Well, that’s fine. say, you must be hungry? You’re not trying to lose weight on one of them fad diets are ya?”
“Doc, note, I dissent. A fast never prevents a fatness. I diet on cod.”
“Sorry to tell ya we’re out of cod. Ya got two choices, Italian or deli.”
“Go hang a salami. I’m a lasagna hog.”
“For dessert, we could hail the young fresh fruit vendor over there...”
“Yo, banana boy!”
“I suppose you’re just out on your way to the new OJ Simpson theme park?”
“DNA Land?”
“Stranger, you got a snappy answer for everything. Don’t you ever ask yourself the spiritual questions in life?”
“Do geese see God?”
“Well...I never thought of that one...Who’s that waving at ya over there?”
“No, next to him.”
“The woman.”
“The other one.”
“The other one.”
“The other one.”
“No, the lady leaving!”
“So Ida, adios.”
“Stranger, I’m getting tired of this!”
“Reach for the sky!”
“Draw, O coward!”
“Well, what’s the trouble there stranger?”
“Snug guns!”
“I guess I got the drop on you then?”
“A man, a plan, a canal, panama...”
“Oh! Got me with that snappy little straw hat!”
“Oh, Palindrome, you’re my hero! Would you join me in my room for lunch?”
“Sex at noon taxes.”

Yeeeeesssss, Palindrome. Staring Bob Ottobob as Palindrome, and Meg Gem as Sis. Check your local station for time and temperature, and remember Palindrome....He get’s em’ coming and going....