Mudcat Café message #2721282 The Mudcat Café TM
Thread #20017   Message #2721282
Posted By: Joe Offer
11-Sep-09 - 12:56 AM
Thread Name: Lyr Add: Murderous Toy (parody of Marvelous Toy)
Subject: Add Version: Murderous Little Toy
Here's a slightly different version:

The Murderous Little Toy
       Words: Mike Roberts
       Music: The Marvelous Little Toy: Tom Paxton

When I was just a wee little lad, my Daddy brought to me
A toy he made down at the lab; it filled me full of glee!
A wonder to behold it was, with many buttons bright.
From the moment that I turned it on, it filled us all with fright.

Chorus: It went ZAP! when it fired; it cursed when it missed,
       And whirred as it took aim.
       It didn't know if we were friend or foe:
       It attacked us just the same.

Curiosity killed the cat, and the dog was next to go.
The parakeet beat a fast retreat, as the wall began to glow.
A turret turned, some bullets fired, and the TV was no more.
My friends, you should have seen it as the napalm hit the floor.

   Chorus

It broke each window down the hall, and then I heard it laugh.
I must admit, I chuckled when it cut my brother in half.
My sister made it to the stairs, when it caught her in the pants.
My daddy had the shotgun out but he never stood a chance.

   Chorus

It fired two mortars at the wall, and when the smoke had cleared,
I looked all around for my murderous toy, but it had disappeared!
Then I saw it leave through watered eyes; the tear-gas smelled so sweet.
Things weren't too good for the neighborhood, as it ambled down the street.

   Chorus

Well that's the last that ever saw of my murderous little toy.
It might be dead but I hope it's not, `cause it filled me full of joy.
They say it reached the Bearing Strait, and crossed the icy flows.
The Russian Army ain't killed it yet, but it keeps them on their toes.

   Chorus

Well, the years have gone too quickly now, and I've my own little boy,
And just last night I told him `bout my murderous little toy.
I recognized his crafty look, I could almost read his mind.
My son has grown up like his dad, `cause he wants one just like mine.

   Chorus


Source: http://web.archive.org/web/20001030001215/http://minyos.its.rmit.edu.au/~rchrw/toy.