(whispered aside) Sideboys?? Is that something like a made-to-order extramarital affair partner?

Bored Wife: "Scuse me, I'd like to know what you have in Sideboys this week."

Clerk: "Why, yes, Ma'am, step right this way, up the gangplank, as you can see by their piping, they have plenty of staying power. Now, will that be cash or charge?"

(Sorry, DaveTAM, I couldn't pass that one up. Something about a sailor-man. Ah...)