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User Name Thread Name Subject Posted
Rozza Lyr Req: I Can't Change It (T. W. Connor) (26) Lyr Add: I CAN'T CHANGE IT (T. W. Connor) 11 Mar 11

My Great Auntie Jessie Kydd knew two verses of this song and I have found the original. A photocopy of the original sheet music is in front of me. The full title is "I Can't Change It!", written and composed by T.W.Connor, sung by George Beauchamp, published by Francis, Day and Hunter in London and by T.B. Harms in New York. It may be sung in Public without fee or licence except at Music Halls and Liverpool and Birmingham theatres. The Copyright date is 1894. There are five verses:

Oh, I know a lot of lazy men,
And meet them when I may,
They've never got a penny-
Always stony broke they say;
With me it's just the other way,
For I'm a man of "biz,"
I've always got a shilling in
My pocket - there it is.
(Producing shilling)

But I can't change it, I can't change it!
The reason why I'll let you know, it's one I made myself and so
I can't change it, no matter how I try,
But I hope to cheat a blind man in the sweet by and by.

Oh, I never was a proud young man,
That anyone can see,
Fashions I don't care about,
For clothes don't trouble me.
I'll never be a masher, for
I'm satisfied to know,
I've got a shirt upon my back,
I can say that although-

I can't change it! I can't change it!
It fits me like a bloomin' sack, I've got but one shirt to my back
I can't change it, no matter how I try,
So when it's being washed I lie in bed until it's dry.

I got an invitation to
A wedding down our way;
So went into a shop to get
A new hat yesterday;
I soon got what I wanted, and
The premises did quit;
Now since I've tried it on my nut,
I find it doesn't fit!

But I can't change it! I can't change it!
For when the shopman turned his back, I sneaked the cadie off the rack
I can't change it, and never mean to try,
Or I might be picking oakum in the sweet by and by!

When I came home the other night,
The nurse was at the door;
She said "You've got another one-
That makes you just a score,
Such a pretty little girl,
I know you'll wish her joy"_
I wished it to old Nick, for what
I wanted was a boy!

But I can't change it, I can't change it.
I asked a lot, who ought to know, I asked the
nurse and she said "No!"
She can't change it, and she doesn't intend to try,
But she hopes I'll have a dozen in the sweet by and by

I thought that I'd get married-
Like a lot of foolish men,
I found the girl, bought the ring,
Got married there and then.
When the job was over,
I was taken down a peg-
Her hair, her eyes and teeth were false,
And she had a wooden leg!

But I can't change it! I can't change it!
It was a great surprise to me, half a woman and half a tree;
I can't change her, I wish she'd do a guy.
But I'll put her up for auction in the sweet by and by.

Auntie Jessie knew verses 1 and 3, learnt from the Pierrots on Cleethorpes beach in about 1905. Her last line was different- "chop her up for firewood" instead of "put her up for auction".

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