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User Name Thread Name Subject Posted
Mickey191 BS: Aphorisms and Truisms, (29) RE: BS: Aphorisms and Truisms, 29 Oct 07

I've burried a brother-at 47, Mom at 80, Father died at 92. Those deaths were preceded by illness-so there was no surprise and we were prepared. It was very tough to see their suffering, but death was inevitble.

So My husband Jim & I were alone. We never talked, for some reason, about how things would go for us. Never talked about how it would be for the lone partner. We always talked of getting old together. It did not work out-he was killed by a drunk driver. The light of my life was suddenly gone.

That was horrific - still is. It is something one never gets over. To view the oncoming years alone just adds another pain to a broken heart.

I'm starting now to divest myself of many cherished possessions-they truly have no meaning.Things I used to love mean less and less to me. Waterford collection, Movies, shopping, friends are of little import to me.   

A friend who was dying of cancer said that as one's death approaches - one lets go of the _things_ which were once important & loved. I don't know if it starts when the years have piled up or if it is an intuitive knowledge one aquires somehow. Before my husband died we went to two cemeteries to place Xmas wreathes on family headstones. At each cemetary he said:"Mickey, don't put me in the ground." He joked:"put me in a jar."   He'd never said that before. That was a Saturday-he died on Monday.

I sure as hell hope I do not emulate my Father's long life-or even my Moms. I used to say I'd love to die in my sleep with some Oreos & cold milk in my tummy. That was a joke in my 40's. Now I'd call it a gift.
Sorry this is so long.

Never count on tomorrow---it may not come.

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