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User Name Thread Name Subject Posted
YorkshireYankee BS: English To English Dictionary (158* d) ADD: Don't Know the Words... (for My Favo(u)rite T 29 Nov 03

As a transplanted Yank (Detroit-area to Sheffield), I'm particularly enjoying this thread.

A few terms I haven't seen mentioned yet:

Shattered: emotionally traumatized (US); exhausted (UK)
Muffler: car silencer (US); scarf (UK)
Scoff: make fun of (US); gobble up (UK)

Mobile: something you hang over a baby's crib (US); portable phone (UK)

There are a few more in this parody wot I wrote (I think most are evident from context, but if not, let me know & I'll clarify).

Don't Know the Words... (for My Favo(u)rite Things)
(with apologies to Rodgers & Hammerstein)

Jelly is jam here, and jello is jelly
Cars have a boot and my foot wears a wellie
Mention "sultanas", I think: Eastern Kings
Don't know the words for my favourite things

Summat is not where you go when you're climbing
Jumper is not someone into sky diving
Bob is Your uncle, the Beeb is your Aunt
Don't know the words to explain what I want

If my languish causes anguish; if you think me sad
Oh, won't you remember I'm just a poor Yank, and that's why I talk... so bad

Beer's sold by landlords instead of bartenders
Don't tell the clerk that your man needs suspenders
Braces aren't something you wear on your teeth
Rubber is nothing to do with a sheath

I stand in line; over here it's called queueing
Lines are engaged but they never need wooing
You work while five while I labor 'til four
Knob isn't always a thing on a door

If I speak, luv, like a freak, luv; if you think me mad
Oh, won't you remember I'm just a poor Yank, and that's why I talk... so bad

Biscuits are sweet but a tart can be racy, a
Nice bit o' crumpet might wear something lacy
Crackers are not to be eaten with cheese
Folks don't wear flannels but you can wear fleece

Chips come with haddock; and crisps in a packet
Soccer is football and baseball's not cricket
Stockings have ladders and Cricket has runs
Baps is the word for my favourite buns

If my diction causes friction; if I seem a cad
Oh, won't you remember I'm just a poor Yank, and that's why I talk... so bad

Two pints of bitter were not a bad notion
Held up two fingers and caused a commotion
I didn't quack but you called me a duck
Muffler's not something to quiet a truck   

You call me luv; I don't know who you are, pet
But when I say shag, ducks, I only mean carpet
Met a cute bloke at the Anchor & Bull
Kept my hands off him but he said I pulled

I get confused but I can't ask my granny
My knickers are knackered and show off my f...reckles               
You can go barking though you're not a dog,
Everyone goes to the loo in a swamp... um, bog!

If you're thinkin' I've been drinkin'; if you think me lewd
Oh, won't you remember I'm just a poor Yank, and that's why I seem... so rude!



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